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View Diary: Write On! Censorship and Resolutions. (124 comments)

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  •  Oy, the pain! But I did it. (7+ / 0-)

    I used an alternate scene from a past exercise that I didn't post. Someone's plaint of not enough sex inspired it, so I wrote it, but never got to posting- just as well. It worked for this!

     "Food?" Jahow's proposal was a taunt softly crossing his auditory buccal, rousing him to full alarm.
     "Thank you, no," Yauls shrinks away. Satiny night cloths do not build a good wall.
     "Thirsty?" a nosy hand snuck up his thigh, causing Yauls mastication.
     "No." Now that was too angry. Aping a limp aquatic anguilliform, Yauls' bluffing calms Jahow. His hand stays. Staying is good. Up a buttock, scars start. Start past hauntings. Turn on mind-body paths to unstopping physical cravings.
    Jahow's hand stays still. An auxillary plan? Yauls waits. Night odors annoy his sinus'.
     "You will fly far, soon?" Jahow's massaging digits avoid scars, avoid any bad flinch.
    Yauls saw Jahow's aim. Was not strings into Tiban high dominion sating? Jahow's ultimatum for this trading position, Yauls paid. In full.
     "Hai, I will. Today." Softly, though. Cut this softly or risk it's loss.
     "What station?" Jahow coyly combs Yauls long, thick midnight hair.
     "Minding own duty station," Yauls shot back, vacating with a flip of divan quilts.

    And I hate writing present tense. I really suck at it, so this seems pretty awkward yet also has spots that really rock. Get that intense emotional punch that doesn't come thru so well in past tense.

    I have to pause to feed some starving (their opinion) goats.

    I just wanted to vote in the primaries. Honestly, I am much too liberal to be a Democrat.

    by WiseFerret on Thu Jan 06, 2011 at 06:29:45 PM PST

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