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Please begin with an informative title:

Jon Stewart and The Daily Show are back!  And he had an excellent segment blasting the 67 Republicans who still voted against the bare-bones $9.7 billion package for Hurricane Sandy relief.

HARI SREENIVASAN, PBS (1/5/2013): 67 Republicans voted against $9.7 billion dollars in aid for victims of superstorm Sandy.
MOTHER......!!!!!!!  (calms himself down)

So this is what I mean.  This is just a simple down the middle, black and white, cut and dry, warm cup of what would Jesus — or any other human being that isn't an asshole — do?  And you blew it.  You blew it!  (audience applause)

What possible reason could you have for voting against aid to hurricane victims by way of a flood reimbursement fund?  What did the Eastern seaboard ever do to any of you?

MARTIN BASHIR (1/4/2013): Paul Ryan joined 66 other Republicans in voting against it.
OK, well, I know what the Eastern seaboard did to him.

(audience cheering)

....

And by the way, you can't just change the rules of the game in the middle of a disaster.  The deal is, if your part of the country gets shellacked by a catastrophe, we all kick in a couple of shekels.  You want to change that deal?  Vote on it when people can't build sandcastles in their living room.

The truth of the matter is, this whole principled ideology thing that you're putting out there is bullshit anyway.  Exhibit A: Mississippi's honorable Mr. Palazzo.

ED SCHULTZ (1/4/2013): Steve Palazzo of Mississippi voted no to help the victims of Hurricane Sandy.
....

Palazzo is the guy who just last year was still asking for — you guessed it — funding of the National Flood Insurance Program for a storm that took place in his area over seven years ago.

REP. STEVEN PALAZZO, R-MS (5/16/2012): Many of my constituents in Mississippi are still dealing with the effects of Hurricane Katrina. ... They depend on the National Flood Insurance Program.
Oh, the Flood Insurance Program you vetoed spending money to reimburse?  Here's a thought experiment.  Let's pretend that instead of your constituents in Mississippi, it's someone else's constituents in New York.  And instead of seven years later, it's two months later.  And instead of a baseline temperature of 60°, it's fucking freezing!  And instead of being an asshole, you weren't.

(wild audience cheering and applause)

Look, Republicans, I get it.  I get that you're the party of limited government.  But we're not talking about Obamacare here.  This was two paragraphs giving aid to people in need.  And you guys still couldn't bring yourselves to vote for it, because of some stupid principle that you yourselves only occasionally live by.  And here's the thing.  If you guys can't vote for this, then we're fucked for the next two years.  And I'm not saying you're responsible for all the problems facing our country, but you sure are making them a lot harder to fix.

Video and full transcript below the fold.
Intro

You must enter an Intro for your Diary Entry between 300 and 1150 characters long (that's approximately 50-175 words without any html or formatting markup).

As you may recall, a couple of months ago, America was hit by two major disasters.  One of them natural — Hurricane Sandy — and one of them somewhat man-made — the Republican majority in the House of Representatives.

Now, the second of those disasters is pretty much making it impossible to clean up the first one.

WOLF BLITZER (1/2/2013): ... the $60 billion Hurricane Sandy aid package — the House adjourned last night without voting on it.
Oh, I can understand that, been a long session, and the House Republicans probably wanted to get home.  Hey, you know who else wanted to get back to their homes?  THE PEOPLE WHOSE HOMES GOT SWEPT AWAY BY HURRICANE SANDY!!!!!

(wild audience cheering and applause)

Yes, the House Republicans somehow neglected to vote for $60 billion dollars in hurricane aid, a move so ri-donk-ulous, even their own members were going after them.

GOV. CHRIS CHRISTIE, R-NJ (1/3/2013): There's only one group to blame for the continued suffering of these innocent victims — the House majority and their Speaker, John Boehner.

REP. PETER KING, R-NY (1/2/2013): I am saying right now, anyone from New York or New Jersey who contributes one penny to Congressional Republicans is out of their mind.  Because what they did last night was put a knife in the back of New Yorkers and New Jerseyans.  It was an absolute disgrace.

Wow.  When Peter King is calling you a disgrace....  (audience laughter)

And I'll say this for Christie and King.  They got results.  Cuz by the end of the week:

HARI SREENIVASAN, PBS (1/4/2013): The House voted today to approve more than $9 billion dollars for flood insurance claims for Hurricane Sandy.
See?  There you... wait a minute.  Yeah, you heard that right.  $9 billion.  Which is, as you may have noticed, not the $60 billion that the Senate passed.  Apparently, the House decided to separate the $9.7 billion in flood insurance from the $51 billion for relief and reconstruction, which they're going to vote on next week.  Cuz what's another week, when you've been fucked for months??  Huh?  Oh, and one more thing.
NEWS REPORT (1/5/2013): 67 Republicans voted against $9.7 billion dollars in aid for victims of superstorm Sandy.
MOTHER......!!!!!!!  (calms himself down)

So this is what I mean.  This is just a simple down the middle, black and white, cut and dry, warm cup of what would Jesus — or any other human being that isn't an asshole — do?  And you blew it.  You blew it!  (audience applause)

What possible reason could you have for voting against aid to hurricane victims by way of a flood reimbursement fund?  What did the Eastern seaboard ever do to any of you?

MARTIN BASHIR (1/4/2013): Paul Ryan joined 66 other Republicans in voting against it.
OK, well, I know what the Eastern seaboard did to him.

(audience cheering)

But, what's his stated reason?

CRAIG MELVIN (1/5/2013): In a statement, he said:
Unfortunately, Washington's legislative response fails on both counts.  It refuses to distinguish — or even prioritize — disaster relief over pork-barrel spending.
Ah yes, pork-barrel spending.  Now I know it seems anathema to Paul Ryan — who by the looks of things, favors lean protein and fit (unintelligible) — so let's take a look at this bill and see what kind of pork Congress snuck into this.  All right, let me get it for you.  Hold on, hold on.  Let me see if I can just get this giant pork-laden... IT'S ONE FUCKING PAGE!!!

It's two paragraphs that add $9.7 billion dollars to the National Flood Insurance Program, and nothing else.  There's as much pork in here as in the mini-fridge at the breakroom at PETA!  There's no pork in this thing!

Whatever happened to the nice moderate Paul Ryan?  You know, this guy?

REP. PAUL RYAN, R-WI (12/4/2012): Truth is, there has to be a balance between the two.  Government must act for the common good, while leaving private groups free to do the work that only they can do.
Yeah.  Guess what?  Private groups?  They kept up their half of the deal.  They raised like $400 million dollars.  Remember this?  (shows footage of Sandy Relief concert)  The Who.  The Stones.  Bon Jovi.  Half the surviving Beatles.  It was so big, Springsteen was the opening act!  This concert was so big, you know what they called Kanye at this concert?  Intermission!

And by the way, you can't just change the rules of the game in the middle of a disaster.  The deal is, if your part of the country gets shellacked by a catastrophe, we all kick in a couple of shekels.  You want to change that deal?  Vote on it when people can't build sandcastles in their living room.

The truth of the matter is, this whole principled ideology thing that you're putting out there is bullshit anyway.  Exhibit A: Mississippi's honorable Mr. Palazzo.

ED SCHULTZ (1/4/2013): Steve Palazzo of Mississippi voted no to help the victims of Hurricane Sandy.
Oh, now I know what you're thinking.  Steven Palazzo, the inventor of Palazzo pants, a.k.a., Jon Stewart's fat day pants?

But no.  Palazzo is the guy who just last year was still asking for — you guessed it — funding of the National Flood Insurance Program for a storm that took place in his area over seven years ago.

REP. STEVEN PALAZZO, R-MS (5/16/2012): Many of my constituents in Mississippi are still dealing with the effects of Hurricane Katrina. ... They depend on the National Flood Insurance Program.
Oh, the Flood Insurance Program you vetoed spending money to reimburse?  Here's a thought experiment.  Let's pretend that instead of your constituents in Mississippi, it's someone else's constituents in New York.  And instead of seven years later, it's two months later.  And instead of a baseline temperature of 60°, it's fucking freezing!  And instead of being an asshole, you weren't.

(wild audience cheering and applause)

Look, Republicans, I get it.  I get that you're the party of limited government.  But we're not talking about Obamacare here.  This was two paragraphs giving aid to people in need.  And you guys still couldn't bring yourselves to vote for it, because of some stupid principle that you yourselves only occasionally live by.  And here's the thing.  If you guys can't vote for this, then we're fucked for the next two years.  And I'm not saying you're responsible for all the problems facing our country, but you sure are making them a lot harder to fix.

We'll be right back.

Jon led off by noting the glut of news that happened while they were on break, and discussed the fiscal cliff fight that happened.
Meanwhile, Stephen talked about the fiscal cliff deal as well, and on the proposals to mint a platinum coin to avoid the GOP holding the debt ceiling hostage.
Stephen then tried to defend Bill O'Reilly's racist rant against Asians living in Hawaii.
Jon interviewed actress Anne Hathaway, and Stephen interviewed Wikipedia founder Jimmy Wales.
Extended (Optional)

Originally posted to BruinKid on Tue Jan 08, 2013 at 05:00 AM PST.

Also republished by Electronic America: Progressives Film, music & Arts Group.

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