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Please begin with an informative title:

Eat all your kid's Halloween candy because the world will fuck them over way worse than that later and they need preparation.

Work through your problems with a positive attitude, healthy friendships and mega fucktons of booze.

Encourage the best in everyone around you and they'll never notice if you steal some of their stuff.

Some believe all you need is love but everyone knows all you really need is fuckloads of money.


You must enter an Intro for your Diary Entry between 300 and 1150 characters long (that's approximately 50-175 words without any html or formatting markup).

God: Just don't eat my apple
Adam: God and apple sitting in a tree
God: Stop
Eve: K-I-S-S-I-N-G
God: Staaaaahp runs out of Eden crying
Satan: You can erase me with a thought but you don't
God: So
Satan: You need me
God: leans and whispers Hold me
Satan: Not this shit again
Lawyer: Your honor, my client gives out King size candy bars on Halloween. Would a murderer do that?
Judge: slams gavel Case dismissed.
Extended (Optional)



Never be a special snowflake if you've got the option to be a big fucking hailstone.

40%22 votes
5%3 votes
53%29 votes

| 54 votes | Vote | Results

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