It was six years ago today,
Possibly, the happiest day of my life.
Or so I thought, then.
I wedded my “soul mate.”
Caring and kind; lover and maker of beauty,
In the presence of both our mothers
At the care center where his lived then.
Just a few relatives and friends
To mark the happy event.
And then, the losses began.
The first thing to go was his job.
He wasn’t crazy about it; still, it was a blow.
The next loss was his mother.
She’d passed 90, so a good, long life,
Yet, as with me, his closest, cherished parent.
I saw the tears in his eyes, though they never
Made it to his cheek. My first chance to meet
His sisters, who came to mark that ending.
Then, came the loss of his house.
Our marital home, it had been; mine rented.
My Navy son made the payments, so the rent could pay for his.
Sadly, that effort was too little, too late.
I still think, will always believe
That loss contributed to the stresses that led
To the final blow, two years on, now
Of him, that lovely, beloved dancer, photographer,
Industrial drafter, mechanic for SAABs,
Lover of cats; we were down to his last one
When he passed, she was ailing and did not long
Outlive him. And then, my house was empty.
Not of things, of which it was choked.
Where we’d retreated, when his went and my tenants
Evicted for non-payment of rent, were an ugly memory.
I was away, when he breathed his last.
My other son found his lifeless body, and set
The processes in motion to cope with that,
And the work on the house, required for
A “bio-hazard event,” in which my husband’s
Passing resulted, as things played out.
Just shy of four years of matrimony,
Two years of memory, since he left this
Mortal coil, I dwell here, alone.
Marking the day, in my heart’s solitude,
So much hoped for, so much learned,
So much gained, so much lost!
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