OK

Let me first start off by saying this will be the last time I use the term Tea Party to describe the most conservative of Republicans.  Yes it is an easy description that they gave themselves, but it is an insult to our past to refer to them in that way.  So from this point forward I will refer to this group of people as Regressive Republicans.

The Regressive Republican is a very unique and interesting animal.  They absolutely despise anything to do with progress.  Not because they oppose moving forward but because progress is the root word of progressive.  If anything even resembles anything progressive it is automatically and evil and wrong thing.  They want to get back to the way things were directly after the War of Independence (or at least back to the ways they believed them to be during that era.  They are not much for facts and their understanding of actual history never gets in the way of their version of history.

This is why it can be good to be a Regressive Republican, though.  If you do not like something you can simply ignore it and that way you do not have to be afraid of it.  Unless you happen to be a follower of Islam.  In that case you just simply hate everything about it (true or not) because the entire religion is your enemy.

You say you do not want to worry about what is happening with the climate of the world?  Deny it.  You do not even have to worry about the fact that every scientific field is in agreement that climate change is occurring and that the only disagreement is how much of a role man has to play in it.  Deny that any of it is happening and you can can go on living in denial.  If that still will not shut up your liberal friends (anyone who accepts global climate change) just offer up how cold it was in your town one day or the record snow on the East Coast as your proof and then ignore what is said after that.

With the deficit it is a little harder.  You know that both parties are wildly guilty of running up the deficit.  You also know that the Democratic Party is much better at reigning in the spending than your beloved Republican Party.  So what do you do?  Change the facts to make it appear the other way around.  More importantly only have a problem with deficit spending when a Democrat is the President.  When a Republican is the President, do not say a word about it and then after the fact only blame the Democrats in Congress during a Republican administration whether they had control of Congress or not.

What do about President Reagan?  You love the man but deep down you know that he would not approve of the Regressive Republican stance on anything.  You also know that he was not a deeply religious man at any point in his life.  How do you message control that?  Again change history and ignore the facts.  Claim that Reagan would be a member of the Regressive Republicans despite him being an advocate of progress.  Claim that he was a very religious man by pointing out all the speeches he gave where he mentioned God.  Do this despite knowing that he rarely attending church and President Obama has attended more Memorial Day activities in Washington D.C. in less than a term that Reagan did during his two full terms.

How about Trickle Down Economics?  TDE has never worked in American history and it has been tried.  You know that it had very limited success (and you know even that can be argued) under Reagan and it was a disaster under George W. Bush.  The leaders of your party, however, still think it is a good idea so you have to support it.  So what do you do?  Whenever any of those nasty liberals (again anyone who does not support TDE) point to the facts when claiming that TDE has never worked.  Simply call them a liar and claim that the REAL facts show that it did work.  Never provide proof (no matter how many times you are asked too) because you and I know that it does not exist.  When those nasty liberals continue to claim that TDE does not work, simply change the subject to how they are murdering babies by supporting a woman's right to choose.

What about taxes?  You love your Medicaid and Medicare and Social Security and are fine with paying some taxes for it, but you are damned if you should pay any taxes for anything else.  You do not fully grasp (and really do not care) that most of your taxes are used to improve your daily life.  You do not want your retirement services cut and you also know that when Democrats do cut the programs they are cutting the excess pork out of it.  You also know that given the chance your party will completely gut all three programs.  But because of your loyalty to the Republican Party whenever their leaders tell you that Democrats want to end the service you get angry, but when the Republicans actually cut the services or change them and make it harder on you, you stay absolutely silent.  You oppose any taxes aimed at the rich (actually you support it greatly but you can not let down your bosses in the Republican Party and will spout off any nonsense they tell you too).

You also believe that taxes are way to high and ignore the fact that you are paying less taxes right now than Americans were paying in 1960.

Here is the real fun part of being a member of the Regressive Republican.  You have the right to call anyone that does not agree with you any name of the book without fear of retribution.  If someone wants to fire you for saying something offensive all you need do is wrap yourself up in the 1st Amendment and Freedom of Voice.  Even though that part of the amendment is strictly meant to protect you from being punished by the government you use it for every day situations, say having your Miss California title stripped for saying publicly that you believe abortion to be wrong.

Also you can label ANYONE that disagrees with you as a Socialist, Commie, Nazi, Liberal.  You can also compare anyone to Hitler because let us be honest what Hitler did to the Jews is really no worse than what Obama is doing to the rich people in the country.  You know in your mind that is a extremely far stretch to make that comparison but it sounds nice.  You can also believe that Socialism is the exact same thing as Soviet Communism and you can interchange them at will.  You scoff at Liberals who attempt to tell you what the the difference is but demand that they tell you what you believe.

Essentialy, to be a great Regressive Republican, you have to abandon all acts of sane thinking and ignore or deny the facts that surround you.  You believe that the bankrolled planned out Tea Party was a grass roots organization led by normal people like you, but believe the OccupyWallStreet movement to be completely bankrolled by high ranking Democrats and ran by them.

It is really easy to be a Regressive Republican unless you have a conscious and can think for yourself.

ADDENDUM: I would be remiss, and I apologize for not putting this in the original, if I did not add this.  In your heart of hearts you know that a very small minority of people abuse the Welfare system, but then again you do not deal with facts.  Instead you take that very small minority and blow it into the vast majority of people on Welfare abuse the system and you will be damned if your taxes pay for THOSE people not working.

EMAIL TO A FRIEND X
Your Email has been sent.