To whom it may concern:

I just read your highly insulting tweet regarding Hilary Rosen, and I am livid!

In your short, snotty little tweet, you have reiterated an extremely hurtful opinion and viewpoint about adoption that I spent years having to deal with growing up.

Follow me over the squiggle for my story.

I am 46 years old.  I was adopted in 1966 through Catholic Charities in Philadelphia when I was one month old.  I know very little about my biological parents:  they were both teenagers; both of Irish descent; and I was born in the hospital associated with St. Vincent's Home for (Wayward) Girls.  That's all I know, and that's okay with me, because I know that my parents (now deceased) who reared me were overwhelmed with joy at being able to adopt me.

My parents were always honest with me about my being adopted.  They answered my questions as best they could, and made it abundantly clear that I was loved and a gift.  In fact, my parents brought me home the day before my mother's birthday, so she always considered me the best birthday present she ever got!  I love and miss her dearly.

But, there was always something else.  It was strongly suggested that while my family knew I was adopted, I still shouldn't talk about it publicly.  You see, being adopted, back then, still had a little bit of a stigma - the idea that I was an illegitimate child, although now a bit more respectable because I had parents.  But they weren't "blood" relatives, and some people viewed that as being less than a true part of the family.

As an adult, I see the foolishness of this, but as a child, I felt like I had this secret, that somehow I wasn't my parents "real" daughter.  And believe me, once word got out that I was adopted, there were those in the neighborhood who told me to my face that I wasn't my parents "real" daughter.  Do you understand how hurtful that is to a child, being taunted with the notion that their family isn't "real" because they're not "blood?"  All every child wants is to be loved, and an adopted child needs that just as much as any biological child, sometimes even moreso.   You see, we understand that, for whatever reason, we could not be with the one who bore us, yet we know that the ones who took us in chose to open their hearts and lives to us.  That is a stronger bond than blood, and that is what makes a family.

And in your stupid, mean-spirited tweet, you opened the Pandora's Box once again that adopted children are somewhat less than pure, and denigrated every adopted child and adoptive parent out there, all in the name of trying to score a cheap shot.

How very, very Christian of you [snark]

You oppose birth control; you oppose abortion; you say every baby must be born and that every sperm is sacred.

But somehow, if the child is not born of the womb that loves and cares for her, she is less than perfect.

You hateful, hurtful bastards.

You owe Ms. Rosen, me and every adopted child and parent an apology, but I won't be holding my breath.

Adopted Child

2:47 PM PT: ZOINKS!  I step away for a few minutes and come back to see this on the rec list.  Thank you everyone for your kind words.  And, if you have the time, contact the Catholic League directly to voice your displeasure.  The nice receptionist I spoke with said she's been getting a lot of calls.  I got the impression she was clearly embarrassed as she kept apologizing to me.

2:50 PM PT: Let the Catholic League asshattery continue.  Apparently, there is a followup tweet to folks calling them on their bullshit:  https://twitter.com/...

5:57 PM PT: One last thought:  I was quite surprised at the visceral response I had to the initial tweet.  While it brought back a lot of internal struggle for me, I viewed it more as an affront to my adoptive parents, my "real" parents.  They did everything in their power to provide for my brother and me.  To suggest that they were less than parents was/is an insult to their integrity and devotion.  So, without shame, I say, "Fuck you, Bill Donohue."

Originally posted to Zombie Saguaros on Thu Apr 12, 2012 at 12:45 PM PDT.

Also republished by Street Prophets .

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