Last night, Stephen Colbert noted Karl Rove's concern about Stephen stabbing Ham Rove last year.

I don't know about you, but I have just gotten a copy of this, and I have, for the last week, been going through the details of Congress's temporary six-month funding agreement, and I gotta tell you, it has got me jazzed!  In that, like jazz, it goes on forever and I don't understand it.

But this thing, this little document right here, is not the big news rocking Washington.  No.  The big news everyone's talking about is the renaming of a conference room last Thursday afternoon at the Campaign Legal Center, a nonprofit devoted to campaign finance reform, whose President is my former lawyer, Trevor Potter.

From here on out, their conference room will officially be called the Ham Rove Memorial Conference Room.  (audience cheering)

Yes.  This is a moving tribute to my dearly digested friend Ham Rove, who was the chief strategist for Colbert Super PAC.  You may remember our motto, Making a Better Tomorrow....

AUDIENCE: Tomorrow!

Last year.

Together, Ham Rove and I collected unlimited corporate and individual and union donations to support candidates in the 2012 election.  Ham picked the candidates, so it's no surprise that a pile of lunch meat chose the white bread.  (picture of Mitt Romney appears)

Now Ham Rove may be gone, but he is not forgotten.  Especially by ABC News, who this Sunday asked Ham Rove's mentor Karl Rove the question we've all been wondering.


BENJAMIN BELL, ABC NEWS: How do you feel about Stephen Colbert's big canned ham rendition of your head?

KARL ROVE: Look, he's an entertainer. ... Though I have to admit, when he took out the knife and started stabbing it, I think he might need a little bit of professional counseling on his anger management issues. ... I don't know whether that was working out his inner feelings, or encouraging somebody to maybe mimic him. ... But there's a little bit of, you know, anxiety in his stabs there.

Karl, there is no need for anxiety.  I am in no way encouraging anybody to stab Karl Rove.  There is a big difference between Karl Rove and Ham Rove.  Jimmy, put up the pictures.

(wild audience applause)

No, Jimmy, not two Ham Roves.  One of them should be Karl.

Thank you, thank you.  You see?  They're totally different.  But, OK, since Easter is coming up, I want to ask everybody to make sure that the nice juicy ham you're cutting into is not Karl Rove.  (audience laughter)

There's an easy test, OK?  Before you slice into your ham, ask it if it ever put anti-gay marriage legislation in swing states to tip the scales in the 2004 presidential election.  If it answers "yes", that could be Karl Rove.  Actually, if it answers at all, better just not eat it at all.

And Karl, to avoid any confusion with Ham Rove, for the next week or so, please avoid the urge to cover your face with pineapple rings.  (Stephen licks his lips, then takes out knife and fork)

No, fight it, fight it!  Fight it!

In an unrelated note, Karl, if you're not doing anything this Sunday, why not come over to my house for Easter dinner?  It's a potluck, but... there's no need for you to bring a dish.

We'll be right back.

Video below the fold.

Stephen also talked about the election of Pope Francis, and the History Channel's "The Bible" miniseries that seems to have Satan looking like Obama.
Meanwhile, Jon looked at Obama's trip to Israel and the peace he helped bring between Israel and Turkey with Aasif Mandvi.
Al Madrigal then had a piece about a group that's pushing to make guns safer — the people that make silencers.
Stephen talked with Junot Diaz about educating undocumented immigrant children, and Jon talked with Game of Thrones' Peter Dinklage.

Also, you guys need to watch this segment from Lawrence last night, where he cites Barry Levinson's observation that Grover Norquist's "drown government in a bathtub" line should be seen as a radical threat to overthrow our entire government.  Just think about what the metaphor really stands for.  Drowning = murdering our government.

Originally posted to BruinKid on Tue Mar 26, 2013 at 12:30 PM PDT.

Also republished by Electronic America: Progressives Film, music & Arts Group.

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