So the holiday coming up is really mixed for me. First of all, I’m more Buddhist or pagan than anything, so I’m not a big Christmas person. My parents always broke themselves making sure we got presents every year growing up, so it’s not a bad childhood thing, it’s more a matter of not being Christian and, more importantly, living in poverty for the last 13 years. When you can’t even pay your rent or bills some months, Christmas isn’t exactly a priority.
I have literally 2 pairs of pants, both of which are kept up by a belt because the button/snap has broken on each. I have lots of underwear, though, but only 3 pairs of socks. I have about 5 shirts I can wear.
I eat maybe twice a day, none of it particularly healthy because healthy food requires two things I lack: money and cooking ability. We’re all disabled in this house, so cooking is done with a microwave or not at all.
I don’t mention all of this to gain pity or sympathy - it is what it is - but to help to illustrate how strange my life is right now. My comic book's first issue sold out and had a second printing. My second issue sold less, but that’s standard, and it got amazing rave reviews. I literally have a higher average for #2 than SAGA #17 has, and it’s a blockbuster issue. I’m NOT saying my book is better than SAGA, it most certainly is not, but the critics really loved #2. I look forward to letting them all down when #3 comes out!
I get fan mail from Germany and Italy and Australia, and people make Youtube reviews of my book in the UK. I have stores HELPING me get to them to do signings. It’s amazing.
And yet I still have two busted pairs of pants and eat twice a day.
This has been the most crazy, frustrating, horribly wonderful couple of months of my life. I don’t know what my point is, or where I’m going with this. I don’t know whether to cheer or cry. I just know that I really, selfishly, want Christmas to be over and done, because once again it’s going to be little more than that day when everything is closed. Next year will be very different, and that goes a long way in keeping me motivated, but waiting sucks. I’ve been dirt poor for 13 years. I’m ready for it to be over with. Now.