OK

I am standing in my youngest son"s bedroom. He is 12 years old. I am trying to get him
up for school,he told me to go fxxk myself. I turned to my wife,also with me,and said I had to go to work. She yells at me and screams, "he is on drugs!".

I ignored her because no son of mine would EVER be on drugs. I had sales to make and my wife was a stay at home mom.I remember thinking how young he was to be smoking
"pot".

I WISH it had been only "pot". My youngest son was already using heroin. My journey
was starting. The journey is stll going on, my son is sleeping in the next room
as I write this. It"s almost noon,he is over 30 years old, his body is alive but he died
that morning ,19 years ago.

I have known heroin all my life,never used it, I was a drunk. Now a man who I loved
to watch make magic, Phillip Seymore Hoffman, is dead.

"Boogie Nights",Magnolia,"Capote, and so MANY movies! I saw them all. Phillip was an
"everyman". He was messy,overweight,and in pain. He was me. I am still in shock.
I bragged to my sons how Hoffman was "grounded",and "real". He WAS in pain and that is why he was "magic" on screen.

My Son noticed how depressed I am and he said, "Dad,being on heroin is like floating
on a cloud. it"s a high that you never want to leave."

My son understands why Hoffman died the way he did,He was floating on happiness
and never wanted to come back.

Heroin is poison to your nervous system,it changes the chemistry in your brain
forever. Both of my sons were destroyed by heroin. "pot" is not a high to them,
it relaxes them but bothj will die before they should,and will never have a real profession,house, or kids.

A Doctor once told me that because of their young age when they started  taking
drugs,their brain stopped  leting them mature,think as an adult, and will forever have
problems,

I have read that Hoffman stopped taking drugs when he was 22. My guess is that his brain finally gave in to the craving. I applaud this great actor for his brillance
for over 20 years. I have had 3 friends die from an overdose and I need to admit
that if PHILLIP SEYMORE HOFFMAN can die from this poison,anyone can.

Seattle is known for heroin and I could get it in an hour. It is cheap to buy.

I have said this before and I say it again:PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR CHILDEN! You
need to set strict rules,know where they are at all times,know their friends and
where they live.The first sign of drugs is the second you put them in rehab.
Your first hint anyone you love is on drugs will be how tired they are. If their choice is
meth or speed,you will see the opposite affect.

Life is  meant to be lived,and to reach for your highest dream. Phillip Seymore Hoffman
reached his mountain top.

I would so love to ask him,WHY? He should have seen a sunrise at dawn, sweating,
and feel a "natural" high. I know he would have loved it.

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