SeaScum: like pondscum, but bigger! Multinational corporation-sized bigger!

BP has apparently come to the same conclusion that 300 million Americans have: Doug Suttles isn't photogenic, and every time Tony Hayward opens his mouth he digs himself a deeper hole (5,000 feet deep and counting).  Poor BP!  Poor Tony Hayward, who just wants his life back!  Excuse me, Mr. Hayward, but we'd like our ocean back.  Rather than trust Hayward to say anything intelligent, BP has hired a spokesperson.  And not just any spokesperson, but one fresh from the heart of darkness!  Anne Womack Kolton, congratulations.  You win the SeaScum of the Day award.

Reuters has the basic story:

Anne Kolton, former head of public affairs at the DOE, starts this week, the head of group media at London-based BP, Andrew Gowers, said on Sunday....

The company has flown in staff from London to help deal with media requests, but has also been forced to put its media hotline on voicemail to process the many calls -- some abusive -- that come in.

But who is Anne Kolton?  Her LinkedIn profile lists experience: press secretary to the Vice President, 2004; public affairs director, Department of Energy, 2005-07; vice-president at APCO Communications, a public relations firm, since election time December 2008.  A 2005 DOE press release gives a little more background:

Most recently, Ms. Kolton served as Vice President Dick Cheney’s Campaign Press Secretary.   Prior to joining the Bush-Cheney 2004 campaign, Ms. Kolton was Director of Public Affairs at the Department of the Treasury and previously served as Senior Advisor to Chairman William H. Donaldson at the Securities and Exchange Commission.

Ms. Kolton joined the Bush administration in January 2001 as Assistant Press Secretary in the White House Press Office after serving on the Bush-Cheney 2000 campaign as Assistant Press Secretary to then Vice Presidential candidate Dick Cheney.

Before joining Bush-Cheney 2000, Ms. Kolton was Washington Liaison for Texas Attorney General John Cornyn.

Sure enough, back in 2001-02 Anne Womack defended Cheney's secret energy task force.  Guess who attended those secret task force meetings?  BP America representatives, that's who.  Later, she moved to speaking on public affairs for then-Energy Secretary Samuel Bodman.

Apparently she's attractive enough that a Pensacola, FL blogger calls her Uber-Barbie.  Rumors from Wasilla, Alaska that Caribou Barbie is wrestling a green-eyed monster may or may not be true.

Who better to speak for BP than a Cheney flak skilled in the ways of both Cheney's campaign style and Cheney's secret energy task force?  This isn't a revolving door, it's a revolving, scummy sewer. Congratulations, Ms. Womack Kolton.  You win the SeaScum of the Day award.

Originally posted to RLMiller on Mon May 31, 2010 at 06:17 PM PDT.

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