One of the more surreal moments of the truly bizarre Trump performance we just were subjected to—which was akin to watching a drugged-up bear pretend to ride an imaginary unicycle while juggling imaginary flaming bowling pins—was our actual, honest-to-God president-elect denying that he would be stupid enough to hire prostitutes to pee on a Moscow hotel mattress because he, as an international hotel owner, knows hotel rooms "probably have cameras."
I am extremely careful. I’m surrounded by bodyguards. I’m surrounded by people.
And I always tell them — anywhere, but I always tell them if I’m leaving this country, “Be very careful, because in your hotel rooms and no matter where you go, you’re gonna probably have cameras.” I’m not referring just to Russia, but I would certainly put them in that category.
And number one, “I hope you’re gonna be good anyway. But in those rooms, you have cameras in the strangest places. Cameras that are so small with modern technology, you can’t see them and you won’t know. You better be careful, or you’ll be watching yourself on nightly television.”
I think we first need to say that many, many people who have said, over the past 18 months, that "Donald Trump would not be stupid enough to [something ridiculous]" have one after the other had to eat crow soon afterward, so the notion that Donald Trump would not do any particular thing, whether it be surreptitiously making deals with Russian officials over his public Ukraine and NATO stances to, sigh, that pee thing, because it's just too stupid to contemplate is, as argument, a non-starter at this point.
But as a Prominent International Luxury Hotel Guy, his matter-of-fact statement that you're gonna probably have cameras in your prominent international luxury hotel rooms is a bit, um, awkward.
Especially since Donald Trump has himself been accused of listening in on phone conversations at his own Mar-a-Lago resort using equipment allowing him to do that.
We can't help but wonder if maybe all those nice foreign diplomats staying at Trump's new D.C. hotel are looking more closely at the hotel room lamps and under the desks than they were yesterday. After all, Donald Trump is one of the bigliest hotel guys in the world. He knows hotel rooms.