From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…
A few reminders on this, the first day of autumn:
• To hook up with your senators and give ‘em an earful about what you think of Trumpcare 4.0 (aka the Graham-Cassidy amendment), the D.C. switchboard number is 202-224-3121. McCain’s a no vote, but we need two more from the GOP.
• The Republican president fills his days by spewing a string of non-stop lies, and his followers love him because he "tells it like it is."
• Mother Nature is really pissed. (Puerto Rico/Mexico relief agencies list here via Samantha Bee.)
• Gay marriage is legal in all 50 states but you can still be fired for being gay in 29 states and for being transgender in 32.
• The only thing taking over the world faster than robots is pumpkin spice.
• This…
• America should be ashamed that North Korea thought of calling Trump a dotard before we did. [Update via Kossack Elwood Dowd: Charlie Pierce at Esquire beat Kim Jong Un to the dotard label. The republic is saved. ]
• The Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act continues to reduce the number of uninsured in America and is growing in popularity. The Republican alternative is popular only with people who thought the wrong side won the Civil War.
• The performance of The Resistance has been damned impressive over the past eight months. The history books are gonna sing your praises. Vive le pussyhats!
• The world may end tomorrow.
• If the world doesn't end in tomorrow, you'll want to weigh the pros and cons of tossing out the coleslaw in the back of the fridge that expired in June.
And, above all, for the next three months don’t forget to stop and take time to smell the leaves. Your west coast-friendly edition of Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]
Cheers and Jeers for Friday, September 22, 2017
Note: Coming up at 11: Derp derp derp derp derp derp derp derp derp derp derp derp, plus Chet with high school football highlights and Sarah’s weekend outlook, tonight on Eyewitness Derp.
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By the Numbers:
Days 'til 2018: 100
Days 'til the Albuquerque International Balloon Fiesta: 14
Number of Paris Climate Agreement holdouts now that Nicaragua has agreed to join it, according to FiveThirtyEight: 2 (USA and Syria)
Percent of teens who tried alcohol in the late 1970s and in the last six years, respectively, according to the journal Child Development: 93%, 67%
Number of state Medicaid directors who say the Graham-Cassidy-Trumpcare amendment is a piece of garbage: 50
Factor by which Russian trade with North Korea increased between Jan. and March of this year: 2x
Number of vaginas kangaroos have, according to the internet: 3
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Yup, must be fall…
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CHEERS to taking giving no for an answer. Oh dear---that sound you hear is Lindsey Graham throwing his friendship ring in the trash, now that BFF John McCain has officially announced he’s a “nay” on Graham’s hastily-thrown-together health care bill that would’ve gutted Medicaid and left the final say on pre-existing conditions (and much more) up to each individual state,many of which have Satan’s spawn for governors:
"I cannot in good conscience vote for the Graham-Cassidy proposal," the Arizona Republican said in a statement.
"I believe we could do better working together, Republicans and Democrats, and have not yet really tried. Nor could I support it without knowing how much it will cost, how it will (affect) insurance premiums, and how many people will be helped or hurt by it. Without a full CBO score, which won't be available by the end of the month, we won't have reliable answers to any of those questions."
McCain did the right thing for the right reasons and earns a tip of our hat. At the same time, his status as an anomaly in this fight says something frightening about most of his GOP colleagues: they have become so bloodthirsty for money and power that they’re willing to fire up the jalopy, hit the gas, and mow down any number of their constituents to reach the Koch brothers’ piggy bank. All the more reason why Democrats need to take back the House or Senate (preferably both) next year. In the meantime we still need two more ‘no’ votes before Wednesday. I’ll do my part and mount a charm offensive against Susan Collins when she comes up for the weekend. I’m thinking tights, feathered cap and freshly-tuned mandolin under her window at 3am. Irresistible.
CHEERS to the chilling season. This afternoon at 4:02PM EDT the autumnal equinox got its groove on and stole summer's mojo. Right on cue the flannel shirttails are flappin' in the breeze and the trees are fixin’ to become nature's fireworks display---big-time this year in New England:
New England’s fall foliage forecast is looking so fine it’s enough to make a maple leaf blush.
For the first time in several years, little has conspired against a truly glorious autumn. There’s no more drought, the summer has been mild and the leaves---largely spared by marauding gypsy moth caterpillars---look healthy.
Translation: A pretty great season for leaf peeping seems to be shaping up. “It’s the most optimistic forecast I’ve had in a couple of years,” said Jim Salge, who tracks the region’s annual autumn pageant for Yankee Magazine.
Still, the transition to The Nippy Side does make everyday life more of a challenge. Biggest pain: putting on ten individual pairs of Gore-Tex toemuffs anytime the dog has to go out to pee. Here at the BiPM household we'll observe our usual solstice tradition: slurping a quart of steaming clam chowder from a dirty L.L. Bean boot.
CHEERS to throwing your proof-reader under the bus. Disgraced judge Roy Moore is running for the U.S. Senate in Alabama (to the right of incumbent Luther Strange, which my political GPS puts somewhere near Pluto), and his campaign is not rolling out smoothly. Check out his campaign bus, specifically the web site on the bottom line:
Yup. Derserves. (Oh, shut up, computer spellchecker, I know it’s wrong.) Nobody proofed his effing bus signage! That’s funny enough, but here’s the kicker: Moore’s Democratic opponent, Doug Johnson, who is doing well in the polls, was quick enough to buy the misspelled slogan’s URL. So when people type it in, it goes to his website instead. Try it---click here. And now that you’re there, maybe toss a few bucks into his campaign chest. For making hay of his opponent’s gaffe, he derserves it.
JEERS to crazy Brits. On September 22, 1761, George III was crowned King of England. His ascension seems to mirror a recent one here on our side of the pond:
"It was a sad day for the British Empire when King George became its political master.
He was a man of narrow intellect, and lacked every element of the greatness of statesmanship.
'He had a smaller mind,' says the British historian, [Peter] Green, 'than any English king before him save James II.' He showered favors on his obsequious followers, while men of independent character whom he could not bend to his will became the objects of his hatred."
Sounds like a certain Jamaica, Queens-born jackass with a twitter addiction who hoisted his bloated carcass on our own throne eight months ago. Anyway, thanks for the colonies, G-3! But, as always, you can keep the kidney pudding. And the haggis. And Boris Johnson.
CHEERS to getting away from it all. A six-person crew just finished up an eight-month stint in a something-something-a-hedron complex on a Hawaiian hillside. The goal was to simulate a Mars-like environment so NASA can better understand potential perils and pitfalls of sending humans to Mars via space Uber (or is Lyft better for long-distance travel?) The researchers who were monitoring the crew from the outside say they’ve learned some important lessons from the test: "[F]or one thing, that conflict, even in the best of teams, is going to arise," [researcher Kim] Binsted said. "So what's really important is to have a crew that, both as individuals and a group, is really resilient, is able to look at that conflict and come back from it." Oh, and also: never tell your emerging crew that Donald Trump is still president before they’re far enough away that they can’t run back inside and wedge a chair under the doorknob.
CHEERS to great moments in naval warfare. On tomorrow’s date in 1779, during our War of Independence, Commodore John Paul George Ringo Jones, aboard the U.S.S. Bonhomme Richard (named as a tribute to Ben Franklin) engaged the British man-of-war Serapis in the North Sea. It was during this battle that Jones uttered the immortal words, "I have not yet begun to fight." Less known was the response from his crew: "Wild guess: you're in management."
CHEERS to home vegetation. Nice cool weekend coming up here---our cue to fire up the teevee for some quality couch time, starting tonight with Chris Hayes and Rachel Maddow putting more pieces of the Dotard-Russia puzzle in place. (Is there a Nambia connection? Find out!) Then on HBO's Real Time, Bill Maher talks with former Rep. Barney Frank, Martin Short, Catherine Rampell, Rick Wilson and Bob Costas. Oh, and the premiere of season four of Transparent is now up at Amazon.
The Global Citizen concert (Stevie Wonder, Green Day, Pharrell Williams et al) is tomorrow on MSNBC starting at 3. New home video releases include mega-smash Wonder Woman and sleeper hit The Big Sick. The baseball schedule is here and the NFL concussion schedule is here. On 60 Minutes: a report on Hurricane Harvey’s destruction in Houston, and a good old-fashioned fluffing of John McCain (more on him below). Sunday night at 8 Ken Burns’ PBS documentary on Vietnam continues. At 8:30 on CBS (and after that on CBS’s pay channel), the wait is finally over for Trekkies as the new series Star Trek: Discovery premieres---may it live long and prosper. And the weekend wraps up with John Oliver, fresh off his multiple-Emmy win, taking on more sacred cows in Last Week Tonight. Now here's your Sunday morning lineup:
Meet the Press: Nancy Pelosi; Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY); White House Legislative Affairs Director Marc Short.
This Week: TBA
CNN's State of the Union: Maine Senator Susan Collins who, I believe, will announce her ‘no’ vote against the Graham-Cassidy health care bill; former U.S. attorney and thorn in Trump’s side PreetBharara, who starts his new podcast Monday; whiny-ass Secretary of the Treasury Steve Mnuchin, who pounded his fists this week and demanded that people stop calling him THE FORECLOSURE KING THE FORECLOSURE KING THE FORECLOSURE KING!!!
Face the Nation: Sen. Susan Collins; Sen. Cory Gardner (R-CO); Rep. Adam Schiff (D-CA); White House Legislative Affairs Director Marc Short.
Fox GOP Talking Points Sunday: Bill Gates says you’re gonna be blown away by Windows 95! Plus: Marc Short again.
Happy viewing!
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Ten years ago in C&J: September 22, 2007
JEERS to the rhetoric of the right. Gee, I can't believe a Senate resolution hasn’t been proposed condemning Michelle Malkin for accusing Oscar-winning actress Sally Field of being "...the mom who buys her teenager beer, condoms, and a hotel room on prom night." Frankly, I'd rather have a mom like that than one who tells her teenager that throwing her parents and grandparents into an internment camp is neato! But I'm just a spoiled brat, I guess.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to the day the Straight Talk Express jumped the tracks. It happened nine years ago Sunday, and it's become a high holy day on the American political calendar. It started when John McCain---back in his evil Iraq War-flogging days, as opposed to his current “let’s save health care” days---kinda-sorta but not really suspended his presidential campaign so he could ride to Washington on a white stallion to stop the economic collapse (that happened on his party’s watch), a much-mocked effort that consisted of a perfunctory appearance at the Bush White House. But that half-baked stunt quickly faded into the background when, with Keith Olbermann (doing a fabo job with his anti-Trump video “special comments” for GQ these days) sitting beside him as a witness to history, David Letterman delivered the coup de grâce after catching McCain in a pasty-faced lie:
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Today Barack Obama is looking back on eight successful years in the Oval Office, and McCain is not. So thank you, Dave, for being so quick that night. But more important: Thank you, John, for being so slow.
Have a great weekend. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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