As soon as Donald Trump’s “grab them by the pussy” grotesquerie emerged late Friday afternoon, Republicans who heretofore had been just fine with Trump’s campaign of hatred suddenly decided to start begging the election gods for a new nominee. But like a person trapped in a terrible dream, they’re shouting stuff aloud that doesn’t make sense—stuff like this:
But the nightmare is real: They’re stuck with a sex predator, and there’s nothing they can do about. Here are the cold facts:
The only option is what election law expert Rick Hasen rightly terms a “Hail Mary”: Trump “drops out," Republicans still ask voters to check his name on their ballots, and members of the Electoral College vote for some other candidate when they convene after the election. If that sounds insane, that’s because it is:
The reason this is such a Hail Mary is because it depends on a huge number of unlikely contingencies: Trump withdraws or the Republican leadership abandons him yet still get voters to choose Trump on the ballot, the “Trump” campaign gets more electoral college votes than the Clinton campaign (requiring a lot of thinking and effort on the part of battered voters), electors chosen by the Trump campaign to serve the Republican ticket (some of whom LOVE Donald Trump) would act faithlessly and vote for Pence or someone else, and Republicans control the Senate. All of this is possible, but not bloody likely.
And even if the GOP tried this, think how badly it would depress turnout. Even now, with Trump exposed as scum of the earth, he still has many ardent fans who would be furious if the hated establishment managed to force him out of the race. Do you think they'd go along with this plan? It’s utterly doomed. And so are Republicans.