This is why you don’t take medical advice from failed meat-mongers who stare directly into the sun. As he was preparing to have his ass handed to him by Joseph Robinette Biden Jr. (Uncle Joe presented said ass on a handcrafted olive-wood charcuterie board with a lovely selection of European artisanal cheeses, a single Bosc pear, and a box of Fruit Roll-Ups, so it’s all good), Donald Trump made a habit of whining about COVID-19 (because it’s something that happened to him, you see) and claiming the crisis would magically disappear the day after the election. You know, because the only reason people’s lungs were turning to concrete all across the country was that the media wanted to make Donald Trump look bad.
Here Trump was on October 24 during a superspreader rally in North Carolina: “That's all I hear about now. That's all I hear. Turn on television—'COVID, COVID, COVID, COVID, COVID, COVID.' A plane goes down; 500 people dead, they don't talk about it. COVID, COVID, COVID, COVID.' By the way, on November 4, you won't hear about it anymore.”
I don’t know which part of that is dumber: the idea that the media would mysteriously stop reporting on the biggest global health crisis in 100 years or that planes carrying 500 people were crashing left and right and no one was bothering to cover it. Either way, Trump’s rhetoric was dangerous, because the implication was that COVID-19 was not a serious problem and was being hyped up merely to damage Trump politically.
And so he shouldn’t be surprised when people’s lives are ruined because he said stupid, self-serving shit aimed at keeping his ocher arse in the Oval Office and out of a rectangular jail cell. Idaho trucker Paul Russell is a case in point. While traveling from Florida to Idaho, Russell contracted the coronavirus, eventually spending two weeks in the hospital. And now he’s fucked, basically:
Now, Russell said, he can’t work anymore. The long-haul trucker has become a COVID-19 “long hauler.” He survived the virus, but it did long-term damage to his body.
“I’m gonna be on oxygen the rest of my life, according to my doctor,” he said.
Now, ultimately, Russell is responsible for his own fate. He refused to take COVID-19 seriously and, according to The Statesman, “once thought the coronavirus wasn’t a real threat” and “didn’t believe in masks.”
Well, he does now.
“Before I came down with the virus, I was one of those jackasses who thought the virus would disappear the day after the election. I was one of those conspiracy theorists,” he said.
Instead, he was in the hospital with COVID-19 a week after the election.
Gee, where did he ever get the idea that the virus would disappear the day after the election? Who might have told him that? Hmm, I don’t know. Could it be …
SATAN?!?!?!
Russell also reports he’s now afflicted with memory and speech problems. His lungs are scarred, he experiences dizzy spells, and his heart races even when he’s not exerting himself.
“All these people that are saying that it’s fake, blah blah blah, they’re lying to themselves,” he told The Statesman.
Yeah, they’re either lying to themselves or listening to the wrong people. Honestly, though, I think it’s more of the latter.
”This guy is a natural. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry." — Bette Midler on author Aldous J. Pennyfarthing via Twitter. Say “ba-bye” to the former guy. The long-anticipated EPILOGUE to Aldous J. Pennyfarthing’s Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump is now available for FREE. Download your copy here! And don’t forget to check out the rest of AJP’s oeuvre here.