Our criticism must go beyond the "quibbling" about details, it must attack the concept of this war. Details can be argued forever, the action/reaction game can be played indefinitely - that is for the most part what is going on now.
They are far from incompetent, their accomplishments are major by any measure, if you look at it from the perspective of their overall plan. All criticism that does not attack the illegitimacy of this war plays right into their hands.
We have created an environment of war, for us to be upset when fighting breaks out in a war zone is only venting. As wars go, this one has not been that difficult for the Americans - if you want to know what a difficult war is read about the German-Russian War of 1941-1945.
Our modern sensibilities are appalled at what is happening and the loss of life on both sides, but in the Cheney-Rumsfeld-Neocon mindset it has been very successful, the losses are all well within acceptable levels. They are, after all the ones making the decisions, not us.
The inescapable fact is they are imperialists, they wanted control of the area, they established it fairly easily. We need to pull back from the dramas of the day and hit them on the overall framework.
They clearly desire escalation and will continue to take actions towards those ends. We need more troops? Well darn, I guess we will have to send them (wink, wink). We need to spend more billions? Yeah, got to, gotta support the troops (wave flag here).
Those poor high-spirited Iraqis can't get along, we HAVE to stay there until we can sort things out for "those people". They aren't used to governing themselves - Saddam never let them, the bastard. Better put up some permanent bases, our boys can't sleep in the sand every day you know.
We spend hours parsing their spin, proving it to be lies, all the while their overall plan is given short-shrift, "tin-foil territory" treatment. As some have said "We are changing the world".