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From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE...
Good morning! Hope your weekend was Fab-O. Here are a couple quickies before we get to the C'ing and J'ing...
Quickie 1: So I'm thumbing through the TV section of the new issue of Entertainment Weekly, and I see a listing for the Top 15 cable shows for September 13-19. The O'Reilly Factor is at the bottom of the list. Let's see who beat him: Four out of the top 15 are episodes of SpongeBob SquarePants. Two slots are taken by episodes of The Fairly Oddparents. Also beating Billy that week: The Weather Channel.
Quickie 2: Conan O'Brien: "TV evangelist Jimmy Swaggart is in trouble for saying that he would kill any gay man who looked at him romantically. In response, a spokesperson for gay men said, `Hey, we're gay. We're not blind.'"
Now on to the red meat. Cheers and Jeers starts in the Extended Copy section... [Swooosh!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!]
Cheers and Jeers for Monday, October 4, 2004
By the Numbers:
Days 'til the Second debate: 4
Days 'til Veep debate: 1
Days 'til General Election: 29
Estimated viewers of Thursday's debate: 62.5 million
Estimated viewers of first Bush/Gore debate: 46.6 million
Number of times Bush mentioned how his job is "hard work" in Thursday's debate: 12
Number of vacation days Bush has taken while in office: 500 (As of April, 2004)
http://www.electoral-vote.com/ : Kerry 238 Bush 296
CHEERS to Newsweek. In this week's Conventional Wisdom Watch, only one person gets a down arrow. Any guesses who? http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/6161069/site/newsweek/. What a nice way to start a Monday.
CHEERS to the `Kerry Effect.' The day after he wins the debate, the Dow Industrials soar 112 points after weeks of lackluster trading...and weather forecasters deliver the good news: No more hurricanes. Will Mount St. Helens will go back into hibernation if Edwards wins tomorrow night?
JEERS to "Hard work." George Bush said it 12 times during Thursday's debate as if he'd never heard the term before. String `em together and it's enough to make you either laugh or cry: http://homepage.mac.com/njenson/movies/hardwork.html. Y'know, there's an easy way to settle this, sir: Show us your calluses.
JEERS to celebrity departures. Janet Leigh dies at 77: http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=578&e=5&u=/nm/20041004/ts_nm/people_leig
h_dc. She once said she could never take a shower again after filming the murder scene in `Psycho.' Making her future co-stars thankful for the invention of deodorant.
CHEERS to poopy polls. Kerry is winning in Marine latrines: http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=1548&u=/afp/20040930/lf_afp/iraq_us_vote_040930152
430&printer=1. Our favorite: "Here I sit cheeks a-flexin'. Bout to make another Texan."
JEERS to the Coalition of the Boltin'. Poland---which Bush defended a little obsessively Thursday night---is leaving Iraq next year: http://gadflyer.com/flytrap/index.php?Week=200441#895. Sure hope that doesn't cause the Solomon Islands to have second thoughts.
JEERS to the original election stealer. In 1876 Republican Rutherford Hayes lost the popular vote by 264,000 and won only when the Electoral Commission handed him the keys to the White House. But it's kinda hard to kick a dead guy on his 182nd birthday. Pay your respects here: http://www.findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GRid=464&pt=Rutherford%20Hayes. Then go make a special birthday donation to the DNC.
CHEERS to Josh in PHL. Kossack reminds us that Howard Dean will be on David Letterman tonight. P.S.---If you only read one chapter from Dean's new book (`You Have the Power'), make it Chapter 5, his eye-opening dissection of the press. Careful your jaw doesn't hit the floor when you get to his kind words for AP's Nedra Pickler.
CHEERS to Moore vs. Coulter. They've got new books out tomorrow, and USA Today chronicles the smackdown: http://www.usatoday.com/life/books/news/2004-10-03-moore-coulter_x.htm. But C&J wonders why media critic Jack Shafer describes Moore's book---a collection of letters from troops and their families---as "partisan" and "trash-talking." Ease up on the coffee, dude.
JEERS to life the way it never was. On this date in 1957, `Leave It to Beaver' premiered on ABC. June did housework in pearls, frilly dresses, and high heels. And I thought I was the only one.
CHEERS to pretty unicorns. How sweet. But the rest of Bush's "found" debate notes are fodder for a mental competency hearing: http://www.thetalentshow.org/images/bush_rules_1.jpg. Oh look...the Psychiatric Board has an opening on November 2.
Cheers and Jeers Flashback: May 4, 2004
JEERS to Bush's Bus of Bravado. Prez heads out to job-strapped Ohio and Michigan to talk about...jobs. With so many people out of work, he should have no trouble attracting a crowd.
JEERS to internal combustion. Triple-A says gas prices to reach $2 per gallon "soon." Paging Mad Max---we may need you to defend our `precious juice.'
Floor's open. What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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