Did Bush have an 'accident' during My Pet Goat?
Mon Oct 11, 2004 at 06:24:26 AM PDT
As
this CNN report shows, news raised in blogs and on the internet(s) can break into the mainstream media, especially stories that they overlooked or otherwise failed to adequately cover when they first had the chance.
I don't want to spread any unfound rumors, but with all of President Bush's speeches recently in which he tries to characterize John Kerry as a wuss ("You can run but you can't hide..."), we have no choice but to open a window into related character analysis and examine a rumor that's been swirling around:
Did George Bush wet his pants during the time he sat motionless and silent on 9-11 after being informed that America was under attack?
Let us start out by stating that there is no verified evidence that the President had an accident, but there has been one
unconfirmed report that the children in the school later reported seeing it happen.
Even some conservative bloggers have discussed pants-wetting in relation to the events of 9-11 (though the target of the discussion is ambiguous - scroll down or search for "pissed his pants" for the appropriate comment)
The circumstantial evidence of an accident offers a compelling reason to seek out definitive proof one way or the other. Looking at the video clip, you can see the President sat completely still with his legs crossed for an extended period of time, which is presumably the best approach to allow the fabric of his suit to absorb any stray fluid before it could reach the floor. Additionally, you will notice that he maintains the positioning of the book so as to cover the primary area where a camera might pick up visual evidence.
However, to date no one has offered a compelling explanation for the President's behavior that morning, other than a transparently retroactive "He didn't want to alarm the children." This link aggregates several media views on the President's reaction. One described him curiously as "unable to function," and all fail to find any rhyme or reason to his distinct lack of action. Momentary paralysis from the fear or embarrassment of having an accident cannot be ruled out.
I'm not sure if there is any video available of Bush immediately after the reading to compare the pants he's wearing before and after. However, its reasonable to expect that the White House travels with sufficient wardrobe that a replacement pair of similar pants would be available nearby for the President to change into very quickly, and that any such video would not be of good enough quality to really look for evidence of any "quick change." That being said, such evidence should be examined by professionals if it exists.
Needless to say, this theory should be treated delicately. All it would take is one major media personality, one talk radio host, one public official, one Democratic congressman, or even one Democratic congressional candidate for an unwinnable seat just trying to get his name in the headlines to even hint at it, and it would spread like wildfire.
The blogosphere would pick up on it. The chattering gossip hounds that comprise the American media would be all over it, ostensibly reporting on the rumor itself, but using their detached meta-narrative as intellectual cover for rolling around in the same dirt as everyone else. Respected political leaders would be forced to disavow any knowledge about it on cable news shows.
Anyway, for the President's sake, I sure hope this rumor doesn't trickle across the internet, leak out to the mainstream media, drip steadily into the monologue jokes of late night talk show hosts, and leave a dark, seeping stain on the discourse of this election. That would really stink.
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