I'm a relative newcomer here, and to be blunt, I was a fair weather fan, a closet liberal. I showed up in this universe on April, walked around, talked to some folks, liked the neighborhood, decided to rent an apartment.
I saw my life in Kos, and more to the reality based community, as almost a marriage of convenience. I've been independent all my life, and really never saw much difference between Republicans and Democrats. I saw (and see) Bush as the head of a theocracy that threatened the very fabric of what is left of America, and although 'jumping into bed' with liberal Democrats seemed odd, it initially was a means to an end. Bush had to go, and if I had to be here and volunteer and contribute to the democrats to do it, I would. But in time, I starting using 'we' and 'us' to describe Kos. I started to believe.
At 1:30 last night, knowing what was going to happen, I cried myself to sleep, and told myself I would drop Kos and this environment, and tune out like I had done prior to this election. I was going back in the closet. After all, it didn't really matter, right? right?
But something odd has happened to me today, and I'm at a loss to explain it. We stepped in the ring last night and got bloodied. Saying anything else is a lie, and we are better than a lie. I live in East Texas. I went to lunch and my car got keyed. I got back to hear my boss refer to 'liberal fags' and 'my man Colburn'. But here is the thing: I'm not leaving. Not Kos, not America, not East Texas. Here is my mantra: This stings, but this is a war. A war that will be fought for decades. A war to stop my brother from dying in Iraq. A war to stop this now not so subtle creeping fascism in this country. And we have been Pearl Harbor style ambushed - for the last 20 years have lead to this morning.
Are we going to win? I don't know. I know I walk among the believers here, and my view is slanted. I know that I WILL NOT stoop to their level. I will not allow the ends to justify the means. I will not have trouble looking myself in the mirror, nor have my sense of shame removed. But I will also not sit by. I will not quit. I will not let them take this country without them having to shed metaphorical blood every inch of the way. I will not relent. Ever.
We got ambushed to get to this day. How and why can be discussed later, because we have work to do. From now on, I don't shop at Wal-Mart. I don't let things like that Colburn Bullshit slide. I'm a progressive, a liberal. And from now on, I fight. Low on ammo(money), with less troops (organization) then them, but loaded with ideals, I fight. Join me. Join US. I'm not saying we win, but its time to march on the black gate.