From the great comedian's standup act, circa 1993.
You know who's really bugging me these days. These pro-lifers ...
You ever look at their faces? "I'm pro-life!" (Pinches up face.) "I'm pro-life!" Boy, they look it, don't they? They just exude joie de vivre. You just want to hang with them and play Trivial Pursuit all night long.
You know what bugs me about them? If you're so pro-life, do me a favor – don't lock arms and block medical clinics. If you're so pro-life, lock arms and block cemeteries. Let's see how committed you are to this idea.
(Mimes the pursed lipped pro-lifers locking arms.)
(As pro-lifer) She can't come in!
(As confused member of funeral procession) She was 98...she was hit by a bus!
(As pro-lifer) There's options!
(As confused member of funeral procession) What else can we do? Have her stuffed?
I want to see pro-lifers with crowbars at funerals opening caskets – "get out!" Then
I'd be really impressed by their mission.
Ah, Bill. At least you died before satire did.