Today is a terrible day in the history of American media. Something has gone terribly wrong. Since this morning, I'm hearing nothing but talk of Sandra Day O'Connor retiring.
The front pages of CNN, Foxnews, and MSNBC websites all currently have up Sandra pictures. And there's tons of instant debate on who's going to be nominated to fill the empty seat on the big bench.
Let's get some perspective people. We need to calm down. With this SCOTUS media blitz, we're not getting updates on what's REALLY important...
Obviously, I'm talking about sharks!!
I mean, what the hell is going on here? Alberto Gonzalez as a possible replacement? I should only be hearing the name 'Alberto' is he's a 10 year old boy whos genitals were gently cupped by a pop star
And who the hell are these Roe and Wade people? They aren't Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, thats for damn sure. Sandra Day OConnor isn't a scientologist, and therefore isn't interesting
The problem is, the MSM has its priorities all screwed up! Normally, they just avoid all the boring crap that comes out of Washington - and that's the way I like it. The DSM shows Bush lied about Iraq War Intelligence? Put that crap on page 16 where it won't get in my way. I don't want to hear about it; who do I look like, Encyclopedia Brown!? Put Ben Affleck's latest marriage on the front page! (thanks for that, by the way, CNN)
I have to admit I'm a little scared. What if this dust up in Washington lasts a little longer though? What if it isn't just over immediately? The news networks will have to relocate their resources to better cover the news. CNN won't have time to do live press conferences from the beach talking to shark attack victims if they have to cover some lame debate about possible fillibusters of a supreme court nominee. What if our beloved reporters get lost among the unfamiliar streets of our nation's capital?? And how will we hear about the DJ changing his story (again) if Greta has to leave Aruba to go interview Antonin Scalia?! Sure, nothing really new has happened on the latest missing white girl story, but if we aren't focusing on it 24/7 we won't immediately know when something does!
I know I speak for all Americans when I say I'd rather watch crap then be aware of the world around me. So, I urge everyone to call your favorite MSM outlet and tell them to get the spotlight back where it belongs.