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I know, I know it sounds a bit crazy, but bear with me on this one.
When I first heard about the national enquirer article citing Gee Duhbya drinking again I of course celebrated thinking    "man this is it, everyone is going to know what a drunken immoral clown this a-hole is". But when I actually read the article, I was taken aback at how this portrayed him as a man who has just too much on his shoulders, and cared too much. And what a great gal his stepford-wife is for caring about him. And he cares sooooo much for the dead soldiers, that he just can't help him self, he has to take a shot of Jenna's, hidden bottle of Jack. .

Now if you look at this from unka Karl's view, although it could backfire, the risk reward ratio is pretty good. First 60% of Americans now think GW is a hopeless dunce. So this story does nothing but reinforce their "reality based" opinions.  While 60% is huge, it's not nearly as telling as say 89% thinking he's a H.D, those are impeachment numbers, and house-of-card falling numbers. So Karl is after that 29% that is for the most part hopelessly stupid, (yet are 100% of the national enquirer readership) but who may actually get it when they get slapped cross the mug with the rotten fish called "high gas prices" and are unable to drive to the 7-11 to pick up that pack of Marlboro lights and busch tall-boy. Yes they may be stupid, but thankfully they are also selfish. So Unka Karl is trying to do some preemptive strikes on the terminally stupid, by appealing to their only sympathetic streak, the one being saved for the knucklehead in chief.  Or better yet, he's providing them with another excuse to support Bush as "good, Christian man "when talking with their friends, while sitting around scratching off lottery tickets and comparing tires on their trailers. As for the other 11% they are the video-of -bush-eating-babies supporters.
    I think that unka Karl knew this was coming, that Bush was just too out of hand and it was going to get out there. Maybe Bush would fall off another non-existent bike, or choke on air, or something similarly as stupid, and some college news guy not associated with any major news conglomerate decides to actually do some reporting.  So Karl had to get out in front of the story, and give it this spin. Now when Bush finally does admit he has been drinking again ( Over/Under 3 months, just before Christmas) he will garner huge amounts of sympathy, and how about that horrible press digging into his personal life, and what a guy admitting he has a problem, and dadgummit, theres `ol Jeebus ready to jump right in and throw him back on that wagon.  Now if that doesn't bring a tear to they eye of every national enquirer reader right at Christmas I don't know what would. (OK, maybe a rescued puppy story) . Plus this has the added benefit of taking the heat off of Rove just before he gets indicted for high crimes.
   So tell me, should I use Reynolds wrap, or the store brand when building my new chapeau.

Originally posted to samsdad on Mon Sep 26, 2005 at 06:59 PM PDT.

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Comment Preferences

  •  I use the "non-stick" oven foil... (4.00)
    I loved the line "choke on air"....

    I wouldn't put ANYTHING past these criminals. There are many ways to get a message ot there and you have hit the target audience dead-on.

    You might be right.

  •  Reynolds Wrap Freezer Duty all the way. (none)
    But it made for a fun read!

    He who gives up liberty in exchange for security is deserving of neither

    by joby on Mon Sep 26, 2005 at 07:05:31 PM PDT

  •  Sounds and feels just like something doughboy (none)
    rove would do...I must admit I tried to imagine which "insider" would dare reveal this and then I wondered why a "newspaper" owned by murdock would "break" the story....hmmmm  I immediately thought something smelled fishy...Just like the fake~real national guard story they fed to Rather..Shameful we have to be so supicious of these people but we do.
  •  I think Rove (none)
    has met his cranial match in you. Are you ready to take him on for the Dems?
    •  Any time (4.00)
        I could take down Rove with one synaps tied behind my ear. Its all about being agressive, and not listening to the other side. There was an awsome poker analysis the other day that hit it right on the head. The aggressive poker players usually win. Rove knows he can throw lies out there, and all he will get in return from the Dems is " but..but.. Thats a lie. i'm mortified"  Yep, and three days later, all the brain-deads remember is the lie, not the retraction tucked in to page 17A.

      The Dems have been on the defensive for 5 years now. Time to take it too them. In an interview bring up the "GW is drink again meme" Except do it like Karl.Here let me help the Dems on this. Heck send out Biden, have him say on MTP:

      " Well you know the National Enquirer had a story the other day that the president is drinking alcohol again and it may be impairing his judgemental abilities. Well I think that is just beyond the pale. I mean look at what happened to our country when the Enquirer had the story about Bill Clinton. I'm sure there are very good reasons why Bush's judgement has been impaired lately, but i doubt its because of alcohol abuse ....again"

      See how easy that is:)

      •  Hey - liked your post - (none)
        but I'll tell you, I'm not so sure about this:

        "that the president is drinking alcohol again and it may be impairing his judgemental abilities."

        Frankly, I'd probably trust the asshole more if he was drunk all the time.  He'd probably handle reality better, and nobody would let him play with the football.


  •  And when Bush passes out, it will be old news (none)
    You know how it goes in the press now. Anytime a report is not the absolute first time for a Bush story, it's old news. I'm putting my money on the falling off the bike scenario as the one where we learn he is drunk again.

    And speaking of bikes, if Bush just has bikes - and no horses - at his place in Texas, how can it be called a ranch? Isn't it just a "place in the country"?

  •  Friend - (none)
    find your paragraphs and double space them. You need some air or white space to make more readable.

    Then, take the Jiffy-Pop and pop it. The tin foil helmet that results is ready made.

    Seriously, I wouldn't put ANYTHING past these Machiavellian bastards.

    peace -

  •  Somehow I can't recommend... (none)
    ...but I'd give you a 4 if you put up a tip jar.  I can't bring myself to recommend your diary because it isn't snarky enough as a joke, or "facty" enough as a serious diary, but I loved reading it!
  •  Want proof of why the story is complete B.S.? (4.00)
    Read this sentence:

    '"When the levees broke in New Orleans, it apparently made him reach for a shot," said one insider. "He poured himself a Texas-sized shot of straight whiskey and tossed it back. The First Lady was shocked and shouted: "Stop George!"'

    Right. You thinking what I'm thinking? There's no way this happened. First of all... Bush knowing that the levees broke while still in Crawford? I don't think so.  This is a man who has chronic newsphobia.  And secondly, Bush giving a rat's ass that the levees broke, let alone knowing what was at stake when they did?.  Again, uh uh.

    •  Does anyone think (none)
      That Bush even knew what a Levee was? I wish people would stop with crediting Rove with everything. I still can't figure out why Bush would put Rove in Charge of the Rebuilding of NO, knowing that he could get indicted by Fitz. Either these are the dumbest people who ever walked the face of the earth or they know something we don't.
      •  Oh he does too know what a levee is (4.00)
        It's what you drive your Chevy to.  And it's dry.  So it can't possibly flood.  All those stories are hoaxes.

        Chaos, fear, dread. My work here is done.

        by madhaus on Mon Sep 26, 2005 at 07:34:50 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  No, no no... (none)
          The Levee is a parish in Louisianna. That's what they call counties there - parishes. And there are some pow'rful Baptists in parts of Louisianna, that have voted to ban the sale of licker - that's what 'dry' means.

          So, when that feller wrote that song `bout The Levee bein' dry, that's what he meant. Crawford is not in Louisianna, but in Texas, and they don't have parishes there, but there is a bar named The Levee, but that ain't dry, cuz it's a bar and all.

      •  Speaking of Rove... here's what I don't get. (none)
        Why hasn't Hollywood come out with a "devil in human form behind the president" movie by now? They're constantly rehashing old plots. Why don' they just take this one from real life?
      •  Yes, stop. (none)
        "I wish people would stop with crediting Rove with everything. "


        As far as I can tell from the evidence, Karl Rove is an amoral thug with no conscience. But to hear some people on the left talk, you'd think he was the most brilliant evil mastermind in history.

        Rove this, Rove that, blah blah blah. Folks, Karl Rove ain't all that smart. The only reason he succeeds is because he can recognize people's fears and prejudices and has no qualms about exploiting them even if it ruins an opponent.

        I hear a lot of crackpot theories analyzing every bit of information or misinformation that comes from anybody within ten miles of the White House and trying to piece together "what Rove is up to."

        I think some people ascribe to him a lot more capability than he has.

        •  I'd say (none)
          the attributes you attribuate to Rove are perfectly adequate for the job.

          I need to steal a good sig.

          by John West on Mon Sep 26, 2005 at 11:27:17 PM PDT

          [ Parent ]

          •  Well yes, and (none)
            ...that's the point. He has the brains and the skills needed to win elections, if you don't mind exploiting and ruining people to do it. But what he doesn't have is the evil genius it would take to meticulously orchestrate every event, every statement as part of some huge chess game, as some imagine.
  •  what I want to know (4.00)
    is how America will feel when W starts snorting coke again?

    "I'd take the awe of understanding over the awe of ignorance any day." - Douglas Adams.

    by shpilk on Mon Sep 26, 2005 at 07:28:56 PM PDT

  •  Bush's Alibi: 'I Was Drunk' (none)
    I confess I am always quick to wonder what is spin, but I haven't been able to figure out any good reason why rumors about Bush drinking again could be beneficial to the White House.

    Only an extreme scenario could justify a Rovian ruse of this nature. After all, what's worse than falling off the wagon? Perhaps the 'drinking' is a cover story for an even more serious for of drug abuse? (See previous comments on Bush's jaw-thrusting here and here; the latter is a doctor's opinion.)


    Perhaps Rove is preparing Bush for an 'I Was Drunk' alibi, to cover for his own role in lying this nation into war? After all, Patrick Fitzgerald did subpoena the notes and records for the White House Iraq Group, so we may be hearing a lot of ugliness about what Bush knew back in August 2002, back when Bush, Cheney, Rice, and Miller were all pushing that bogus uranium story on the media... But then again, that would get Rove into trouble, and we all know Rove would never take the fall...

    Sometimes the simplest explanation is the best explanation. And sometimes the Enquirer just gets things right (they pay their sources and they get sworn affidavits). Drunk is drunk, and drugs prescribed (probably in desperation by Bush's doctors) to avert his alcoholism seem to be showing on Bush's face these days.

    The telling detail for me in this story is the statement that people around the President are reported to be concerned that he is 'falling apart.' Well, that's obvious: you only have to look at Bush these days for a pretty serious confirmation of the notion that, yep, he's pretty much falling apart before our eyes. Any argument on that?

    "[I]n all due respect to your profession [journalism], you do a very good job of protecting the leakers." -- Bush on Oct 7, 2003

    by QuickSilver on Mon Sep 26, 2005 at 07:29:37 PM PDT

    •  Maybe he's preparing for (none)
      a Twinkie defense at the impeachment?  (And we know who's the Twinkie, don't we?)

      If a thousand men were not to pay their tax bills this year, that would not be a violent and bloody measure, as it would be to pay them, and enable the State...

      by HenryDavid on Mon Sep 26, 2005 at 07:34:20 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

  •  You may be on (none)
    to something.  Don't rush out for the Reynolds yet.....


    by martik on Mon Sep 26, 2005 at 07:30:53 PM PDT

  •  I agree there's something fishy (none)
    The drunk story sounded too much like the pot smoking story--the one, shortly after the election, where the family friend revealed that some old interview tapes had Bush admitting he tried pot (but was so worried that it would give the wrong impression to the children, so he never admitted it publically).

    But why would this be planted?  How about this for a theory:

    Bush is indeed drinking more and more and Rove thinks it will come out sooner or later.  So to make the story toxic--something the corporate media won't touch--he places it in The Enquirer.  So, if there might be a story ready to break, it could now be discounted as the equivalent of a bigfoot sighting.

  •  Theorized this already (none)
    It's a plant.

    But by whom?  Rove?  or somebody else sidling up to another reveal?

  •  To catch a thief, (none)
    you've got to think like a criminal.

    Sad how many of us have stayed up nights probing the twisted mind of Rove, and tried to play three-dimensional political chess with his evil shadow flickering on our living room walls.

    Good work!  It certainly fits the M.O. of so many other Rovian moves; I'm glad when others nudge me into applying that lens to each new item of news.

    If a thousand men were not to pay their tax bills this year, that would not be a violent and bloody measure, as it would be to pay them, and enable the State...

    by HenryDavid on Mon Sep 26, 2005 at 07:37:09 PM PDT

  •  As much as I like the idea... (4.00)
    ...that the White House put out the Bush drinky-drinky stories because they wanted to portray the President as a lovable, tragic Otis figure... I can't really buy it.

    We keep falling into the trap of assuming Rove is as brilliant as his marketers keeps telling us he is. He's not, he's just a vicious, slandering liar who gets where he needs to go by being willing to erase more ethical lines than anyone else around him.

    I don't think the White House would willingly put out a Bush off-the-wagon story because it contradicts their primary line used to sell Bush -- that he's a strong, resolute, confident leader. A strong, resolute, confident leader doesn't drown himself in a bottle when the going gets tough. Hard to see any way to spin that as a positive.

    What I think is really happening is that, in the wake of Katrina and a few other (more purely political) disasters, underlings on the White House inner staff are getting really, really nervous and beginning to stray from the normal White House discipline, becoming far more willing to give the straight skinny to reporters on deep background. It's basically a rats-leaving-the-ship effect. Bush's failures inspire disloyalty among a staff that never respected him much to begin with.

  •  I Don't Buy It (none)

    But still, as one who respects Serious Tinfoil, I salute you.

    "In this world limits are not only inescapable but indispensable." (Wendell Berry).

    by proudtinfoilhat on Mon Sep 26, 2005 at 08:07:08 PM PDT

  •  Say, does anybody remember Daniel Schorr (none)
    saying something about the fact that "everybody" in DC was talking about a serious medical problem Bush had but that wasn't public? And then he never let on what it was?

    I thought I read about it somewhere . . . and it probably wasn't all that recent.

    Did I dream this?

  •  cynics anonymous (none)
    Just before Christmas, in a public display, neath a Christmas tree with snow flakes AND a puppy. I think you understand Mr Roves thought process well. When it comes to ratings you have to be creative.
  •  Everyones got it backwards! (none)
    Rove planted the FALSE story so they could show shock that a story like this, from the National Enquirer, would be the talk of the liberal media.  He will say it proves you can't believe ANYTHING they say.  Don't fall in the trap --
  •  Adjusting my tinfoil hat so it points to (none)
    the proper vortices, how about this:

    The Enquirer story is the backdrop for Bush stepping aside.  It's gotten so bad, so unreversible on so many fronts that Karl has devised an "exit strategy" for George.

    Enter Dick Cheney, one of the "grownups" who can help mend a broken country.

    Vorticies responding with harmonic radiation?  


    We now return programming back to your control.

    The rhetoric of the right wing is being fixed around the policy of disinformation.

    by MoronMike on Mon Sep 26, 2005 at 11:03:18 PM PDT

    •  Hey, that's my idea! (none)
      I came down with it the day they dragged Cheney down to the Gulf Coast for his very own photo-op. He'd already be prez if not for that doctor fella saying those dirty bad words during the shoot.

      I need to steal a good sig.

      by John West on Mon Sep 26, 2005 at 11:34:50 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

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