Daily Kos

Why I support President Bush

Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 02:53:34 PM PDT

It hasn't happened yet, but I am hoping that some eager news reporter will ask me at the pump how I feel about gas prices, which will allow me the opportunity to extoll the virtues of our excellent President.

Reporter How do you feel about gas prices at the pump?

Me I think you have to look at the big picture. I'm a high income guy. What with the windfall tax cut I have thanks to President Bush, it would be churlish of me to complain about the $85 it takes to fill the tank of my SUV.

Reporter But don't you think these prices are a problem for most people?
Me I don't care about most people. I care about me. And for my money, President Bush is a guy who delivers. Considering what the President has done for me and my business, paying more for gas is all well and good. I only regret that I didn't see the gas price increase sooner so that I could get in on the action. Those oil and gas guys are making profits that are truely obscene.

R What kind of work do you do?
M I'm a consultant to corporate executives.  I help them develop asset conversion strategies.

R You mean you help corporate executives raid the assets of the companies they manage? Don't executives have a fiduciary responsibility to their stockholder, employees, and to the public?
M Son, concern for employees is so last century. As for the stockholders; they're mostly rich people, so they understand. If any big stockholder gets too upset, we put him on the board or show him how to use these same stragies at his own company.

R But isn't that breaking the law?
M It's only wrong if they convict you. Our President understands that. That's part of the Bush genius.

R So you think Bush is smart?
M A genius. Look, it is hard to gain the kind of stranglehold on power that he has in a democracy. Winning an election when only serving the interests of the wealthy is not easy. But he found a way. A few "hail Jesus" and lots of people vote for you. Smear the other guy; call him a liberal, a tool of the terrorists, or better, a queer, then fix the election by controlling the ballot box in the few states you need. And I'm living proof this works, the few thousands that me and each of my friends contributed has come back many times over in tax cuts, a relaxed regulatory environment, and "don't ask, don't tell" enforcement of corporate actions.

R But he started a war that he can't stop, American troops are getting killed and injured every day, global warming is proceeding unchecked, global terrorism is rising; doesn't any of this concern you?
M The war is for the benefit of the poor people. They seem to like it; it's mostly them over there fighting it. Nobody I know is involved so it's no skin off my nose. And as for global warming, I think it helps for it to be a few degrees warmer, especially in winter. But it is Bush's personal philosophy that I find inspiring. You can't listen to the naysayers and the complainers. You have to live your life.

God Bless America.
God Bless the American Flag.
God Bless our President, George W. Bush.

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Permalink | 95 comments

  •  It is enough to make your laugh (4.00 / 8)

    through your tears - -

    It is just too close to home -- but I agree with you -- I would love to hear that on TV and then listen to all the GIPs fall in a death faint on the floor --

    the emperor has no clothes -- now the truth is out.

    "Proud to proclaim: I am a Bleeding Heart Liberal"

    by sara seattle on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 02:54:08 PM PDT

  •  Let us know when you find THAT reporter. (4.00 / 5)

  •  And to think I was worried (4.00 / 65)

    ... for a moment I considered posting an "irony alert". Thanks, guys, for the comments.
  •  People should recommend this... (none / 1)

    ...because it is sad but true.
  •  Why I recommended this diary (4.00 / 5)

    Because it's the funniest diary I've ever read and the kind of subversize humor I think we should use against these wing nuts since most of them can't understand satire.
  •  Truly horrible. (4.00 / 11)

    How did you manage to see into the hearts of all of Bush's "Pioneers" and "Rangers?"

    BTW: The SUV was purchased last year by his company and written off as a heavy equipment expenditure. (That loophole was closed this year)

    And, as mentioned above. Where did you find that reporter? Your Bush loving scumbag was so realistic, but your reporter was wholly unbelievable.

    Gotta make it somehow on the dreams we still believe. - R. Hunter.

    by mungley on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 03:22:42 PM PDT

    •  Little known fact (none / 0)

      The 'wholly unbelievable' reporter was actually Jeff Gannon. Since he no longer works at the White House, I guess he's interviewing the (wholly unbelievable) man on the street.

      The plural of anecdote is not data.

      by bobinson on Sun Aug 21, 2005 at 10:03:43 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

  •  BRAVO! (none / 0)

    ...thanks for this post... it has made a foggy day in the Bay bearable...
  •  Praise the Lord, And Run Down The Grave Markers! (4.00 / 3)


    Yikes!!!

    Suddenly, my Inner Freeper has the run of the place. :(

  •  I'd love to see this (4.00 / 19)

    ...turned into a commercial.
  •  so unrealistic! (4.00 / 6)

    what reporter do you know of that would ask a question like this?:

    R "But he started a war that he can't stop, American troops are getting killed and injured every day, global warming is proceeding unchecked, global terrorism is rising; doesn't any of this concern you? "

    If only there was one.

  •  One of my pro-Bush co-workers told me this week, (4.00 / 6)

    "At the end of the day, we are better off without Saddam in power, because he would have ended up doing something awful to us."

    Huh?  More awful than the Iraq War serving as a poster child to anti-American leaning people around the world to become terrorists and suicide bombers??  Saddam was an irritation to us, but he had no access to WMD's.  If we "took out" every dictator around the world that was an irritation to the USA, America would have no soldiers left, and America would have to file for bankruptcy.  

    War is not cheap, not cheap in terms of the hundreds of billions of dollars it takes to fight them, and not cheap in terms of the tens of thousands of lives the war destroys, maims, and kills.

    And violence begets violence (i.e. just as in the laws of physics, for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction).  Unless one was correct in assuming that Iraqis would "greet us with flowers and chocolates", our invading Iraq without international backing was pure folly.  

    Bushies make no sense.

    -4.75, -5.33 Cheney 10/05/04: "I have not suggested there is a connection between Iraq and 9/11."

    by sunbro on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 03:50:50 PM PDT

    •  saddam was a bad man, no doubt (4.00 / 2)

      but he was a bad man when we were propping him up.  If Margaret Thatcher hadn't challenged GHWB's manhood, we might be propping him up to this day.  The truth is, he never did anything bad to us other than trying to have GHWB killed.  And I'm not sure there is good evidence that was Saddam.  
      •  solution to the conundrum (none / 0)

        is not to get easily irritated by dictators.

        Basically, what "irritates us" if a bastard barks at the hand that propped him.  I say "bark" because no "biting" is necessary.  It is an ancient principle.

        You do not offend mafia by mere membership in non-gangster public, or even by a membership in a competing gang (granted, some other reason for irritation may emerge).  But if you were a "made man" and than you left the gang, some stern measures are called for.

      •  i'm sorry but (none / 1)

        i've gotta say it.  we were all better with saddam in power.  he at least kept the religion out of the government.  anyway, wanna attack a mideastern country and make a difference?  saudi arabia's calling your name.  at least saddam had the sense to call himself the president.  that's at least more democratic than "the king."

        Hey, wait a minute, there's one guy holding both puppets!

        by mediaprisoner on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 07:12:14 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

    •  "At the end of the day..." (4.00 / 8)

      It's dark.

      Man, how tired I am of that stupid phrase, at the end of the day...as if it is blindingly obvious that we're all so much better off, and we just shouldn't think about it any more.

      War is not an adventure. It is a disease. It is like typhus. - Antoine De Saint-Exupery

      by Margot on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 04:32:00 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

    •  It's not "just" the lives & $$$ (4.00 / 3)

      Even though the lives lost [and damaged] and the huge amounts of money poured down the Iraq rathole [with quite a bit making its way to Halliburton et al.] SHOULD be enough to convince folks this war is not worth it, we should remind them that there are many other costs.

      Think about the many needs we have at home that could be addressed with the money and talent being wasted in Iraq:

      --building schools and paying teachers;
      --providing health care and affordable medicine;
      --supplying job training and jobs;
      --creating affordable housing
      --repairing OUR crumbling infrastructure;
      --cleaning our air, water and SuperFund sites;

      and on and on.

      Add to that the experienced officers in the military and National Guard who are leaving, and the fact that none but the most desperate will sign up for the "volunteer army."

      And finally add the fact that we've pissed off both our "enemies" (and created even more of them) AND our "friends" (such that they'll never join or believe us).

      NOW tell me how this War of Errors has made us "safer."

    •  The USA is Virtually Bankrupt Now (4.00 / 2)

      How much money is the government borrowing from foreign banks and other interests (gov'ts)?  2B (yes that is B for billion) every day.

      Be assured, it is far from sustainable with current tax schemes.  Of course, with the kingly sums of money (most of which goes unused) allotted to the wealthiest of our "fellow" Americans, the debt could be paid off with relative ease in a matter of 20 or 30 years.  

      This could be done while benefitting the domestic economy, encouraging the domestic production, and services sectors - think about how much employment could be created in habitat restoration.

      •  When Repubs cry during the campaign... (none / 1)

        that "Democrats are going to increase taxes!" the Dems should not beat around the bushes. "Hell yeah, we're going to tax the shit out of all your wealthy friends!"

        i think they're attacking me cause i'm awesome. how's that??

        by missreporter on Sun Aug 21, 2005 at 06:36:18 AM PDT

        [ Parent ]

    •  This argument always drives me INSANE (none / 1)

      because it is analogous reasoning to teaching your five year old child that it's okay at the end of the day to have smashed another child in the face just because that other child might have done something to him at some point in the future...

      It makes absolutely no bloody ethical or moral sense.  How can these people take themselves seriously?  Are they idiots?  Think of the literal etymological derivation of the term idiot-- having to do with something oriented toward or driven by the self, unconnected to other ways of making things work.

  •  sad but true (none / 1)

    indeed!

    -8.00, -8.26 "Fascism is capitalism plus murder." - Upton Sinclair

    by djMikulec on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 04:18:06 PM PDT

  •  Holy merde...this was fun to read... (4.00 / 2)

    A real tour de force, ilan.

    tour de force [Fr.],
    a feat of strength, skill, or ingenuity; often one that is is merely clever or spectacular.

    A nice little French expression for the cleverest of donkeys in elephant's clothing.

    You didn't think you were actually going to fool us, though, did you? Your usage of 'don't ask, don't tell' in your clever little tale (although not bandied about in the typical Clintonian military policy fashion) blew your cover BIG time. Don't you know by now? You're not supposed to use the other side's frames! Don't Ask, Don't Tell is our meme, see?

    Nice try, though...<wink> Nice job!

  •  A Few More Words For Ilian's "Me" (none / 1)

    "Me" - Look we lost 58,000 in Vietnam for "democracy" and they had no oil. Just a lot of worthless jungle and rice paddys. In Iraq we can certainly lose 10,000 - 12,000 men, no problem until at least 2009, likely a lot longer, as long as we control the oil. This is a win/win for the USA.
  •  Eye catching title! (4.00 / 2)

    I got out my flame-retardent keyboard before I read it.  ;-)

    Hilarious!  Recommended.

    Arrogant lips are unsuited to a fool-- how much worse lying lips to a ruler - Proverbs 17:7

    by BarbinMD on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 04:47:28 PM PDT

  •  I do believe (4.00 / 2)

    you are disassembling again, ilan. That means...

    Today's Special: Chickenhawk, slow-baked in its mother's basement.

    by Earl on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 05:08:33 PM PDT

  •  I held my breath (none / 1)

    when I clicked on this diary. As I read the first couple of paragraphs, I gradually allowed air to flow through my windpipe and lungs. Whew!

    This "interview" aptly describes the lunacy Dubya has created for the masses who cry at the gas pumps, and the millionaires who grin as their bank accounts bulge.

    The guy who people say they admire because he is like the guy next do is a modern-day Nero. I wonder how will this modern-day nightmare end?

    -7.38, -5.23 "Though the storm may be raging, and the billows tossing high, Lord I feel like going on."

    by CocoaLove on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 05:17:59 PM PDT

  •  I Love Bush! (none / 1)

    (But not our President)

    </bumpersticker>

  •  I've got the blues from blue collar beauticians. (4.00 / 5)

    My hairdresser today said "Well the economy is so good, Clinton did not do that".  I wanted to walk out with my hair all in foil at that point, but instead said: "What do you mean?'
    She started to tell me about all the jobs we have now, I stopped her with no, it is not true.  We, in Tennessee have lost 200,000 manufacturing job, the good jobs are gone.  Plus we have the cost of gasoline.  
    Her response was well Democrats could have done something about oil, it is not just the Republicans fault.  I stated how can we  when we control nothing in the Congress, Executive or Judiciary branches.  I then went on about the Energy Bill and ANWAR and if only Mary Landrieu were a better Democrat... we would not have these problems.  But why bother?

    Many of the workers  do not think we have any thing but positive things taking place.  I sounded like a naysayer even when I said gasoline was $8-12  a gallon during Clinton and now it is at $67., she did not think anything of it.  What to do? Bush has convinced them they are better off than 7 years ago, this is just crazy!  Not only that it is making me crazy just talking about it.

  •  Soaked keyboards throughout the nation (4.00 / 3)

    Are you sure you don't work for some computer peripheral manufacturer? Because you just caused a fair amount of potent  potables to exit the nasal passages with rapidity.
  •  Dr. Mr. Bush Supporter, (4.00 / 9)

    As a member of the super-rich class, I condemn your comments.  We who are in the class to which you aspire but may never achieve have several rules.  If you ever want to join us, please be advised that you fail to follow the rules at your peril

    First, never talk to reporters. "We" just don't do that. We have spokespersons.

    Second, never brag about your SUV, because the person you're talking to, if it is me, flies a Gulfstream.  My co-pilot get's paid six figures to fetch me ginger ale.  Oh, and he takes off and lands, too.

    Third, you should feel sorry for people on a status only higher than yourself.  That's right, because it's you "merely rich" folk that should be worshiping at the feet of people like me that you can make all that money.  You should feel bad that I don't make more.

    Last, if I own a country, by God I can make war on it, through it, or because of it.  I own a couple of them, and when things get boring, I call up Rummy for a war starter kit.  Haliburton sells one real cheap.

     

    The rhetoric of the right wing is being fixed around the policy of disinformation.

    by MoronMike on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 06:32:19 PM PDT

  •  I only care about me, too. (none / 1)

    And my money.

    Chaos: Not just a theory, its a way of life.

    by Agent of Fortune on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 06:52:41 PM PDT

  •  I often feel this way about Hummer drivers (4.00 / 2)

    I think, it's great that gas prices rise to it costs them a ton to drive their big dumb ass SUV. But then I remember that they have the money to buy a Dummer, so the price of gas to put in it isn't an issue.

    It's the contractor driving to the jobsite that suffers, not the rich moron in his Dummer.

    •  To take the level of discourse down a notch ... (4.00 / 2)

      I hope that the gentlemen of the thread will pardon me if I share that, when I see a man behind the wheel of a Hummer, all I can think of is how inadequate he must feel about what's under the hood, so to speak ...

       ... because for anyone dumb enough to buy a tank like that, size obviously matters.

      "Nature favors the apt, not the strong or the weak." Louis Sullivan

      by Lilibeth on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 07:26:32 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

    •  Squeeze on the workers (4.00 / 2)

      When revolt about fuel prices comes, it will begin with the independent truckers.  They take loads on contracted flat rates, they are responsible for all their expenses.  While the shippers may have had to somewhat adjust their rates in order to get any drivers at all, I strongly doubt that freight contract rates paid to independent truckers have kept pace with diesel costs.  
    •  Penis Size (none / 1)

      is inversely proportional to Car Size.  So all SUV drivers have little dicks.  And as we all surely should expect, little dicks vote for Bush.
      •  Well .. not entirely (4.00 / 2)

        Porches and cars like Ferrari Mondial's are not big cars, and certainly tend to be outward compensation for other things. Though I admit the styling and the engineering of both badges of automakers is outstanding. Can't fault them for the assholes who buy their vehicles that are top of the line (in those terms).
  •  Brilliant (none / 0)

    n/t

    The Permanent Republican Majority lasted about as long as The Thousand Year Reich

    by lawnorder on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 07:35:17 PM PDT

  •  Didn't You Cut in Front of Me (4.00 / 4)

    in your red Hummer

    as you talked on the cellphone

    and changed lanes without signalling

    near Greenwich, CT

    on 95-North today?

  •  Sadly, I have had this conversation (4.00 / 2)

    Okay maybe not exactly but I have a friend who with his spouse pulls in around 1/2 million a year.  And some of the sentiments in your diary are exactly what and why he is pro-Bush.  Saddens me deeply because it is so short sighted.

    "You have attributed conditions to villainy that simply result from stupidity"

    by newfie on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 07:50:14 PM PDT

    •  You outed me (4.00 / 8)

      I confess, the idea for this diary came from reading the earlier recommended diary about someone interviewing people at the gas pump -- for real, and the innane things that people struggling economically said about their heartfelt support of Bush, and my wife's story of someone she knows who explained her support for Bush in the last election in terms almost exactly as I wrote in this diary.

      I wish I could lay claim to being more creative, but there is too much truth in this piece.

      •  I read that as well. (4.00 / 2)

        What we have here is a convergence of the I get my news from the bible and don't need to know anything else and the hell, I am saving a bundle with these tax breaks crowds.  That is what brought this regime into power.  

        "You have attributed conditions to villainy that simply result from stupidity"

        by newfie on Sun Aug 21, 2005 at 05:23:31 AM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  "get my news from the bible" (none / 1)

          That is a classic quote, in more ways than one.

          That one should be patented!!!

          •  That is an actual quote on the diary (none / 1)

            A woman was asked a serious of questions - one of which was where she got her news re: Iraq and she answered from the Bible and the 700 Club.  I wish I could find that diary but it was one that runs in a series.  I don't have time now but I will look later.

            "You have attributed conditions to villainy that simply result from stupidity"

            by newfie on Sun Aug 21, 2005 at 08:51:31 AM PDT

            [ Parent ]

    •  Donald Trump (none / 1)

      He's basically admitted those are his reasons also during interviews on national tv.  No shame.

      Money, money, money...

      He had reservations about Iraq but not enough to risk losing a few bucks.

      Having said that, are you guys aware that the richest 2% of Americans actually voted more for Kerry?

  •  and don't forget to kiss the flag! (none / 1)

    right on and with such great humor!

    Unfortunately, the truth doesn't brother them!

       

    "Spying on the populace is a giant step toward totalitarianism." -- Bob Herbert

    by hws on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 07:50:37 PM PDT

  •  I've actually heard people say this (none / 1)

    "My economy is doing great, so as far as I'm concerned, the economy's just fine!"

    Now, myopia is a human characteristic, to be sure, as is selfishness, as is ignorance.  So I don't know how you can possibly reach people who decide to think this way, other than showing them the dangerousness of such thinking, not for the world but for THEM.  Everything has consequences.  

    D-Day, the newest blog on the internet (at the moment of its launch)

    by dday on Sat Aug 20, 2005 at 09:11:14 PM PDT

  •  OMG (4.00 / 4)

    It NEVER occured to me before reading this but THIS is exactly how I need to go about my "conversion plan". Instead of arguing with people, just go along with what they say and add to it with comments like these.  

    I work in a company that is 95% pro-Bush. Instead of fighting them all the time, I can slowly convert them THIS way!

    Great idea. thanks!

    PS. I am imagining some really good/funny bumper stickers right now too.

  •  What on earth would ever make you think a (none / 0)

    reporter would press you for replies on reality?

    They would never press you about the death and mayhem in Iraq... they would never in a million fucking years ask you a softball set-up by posing the question about amoral corporations and their vested interests. Ain't EVER going to happen.

    Good rant and all, but pure fantasy to ever get the opportunity to have a reporter with the brains or the balls to actually probe for the truth, and reality.

  •  Best Diary of the Century (none / 1)

    I would like to see it put into a Web Toon
    with the words coming straight from the mouth
    of Hannity.
  •  Too unrealistic! (4.00 / 3)

    A reporter would never say this:

    "R But he started a war that he can't stop, American troops are getting killed and injured every day, global warming is proceeding unchecked, global terrorism is rising; doesn't any of this concern you?"

    That would make the GOP look bad... and we can't have that.

  •  In the fine tradition of Jonathan Swift (none / 0)

    A Modest Proposal: For Preventing the Children of Poor People in Ireland from Being a Burden to Their Parents or Country, and for Making Them Beneficial to the Public

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Modest_Proposal

    and while at Wikipedia, have a look at
    http://wikimediafoundation.org/wiki/Fundraising

  •  Tee Hee (none / 0)

    if you want another laugh......

    Check out the BRAC commissions recommendations for revamping the military.

    It is a combination of enron style economics, relocating political strong holds for the red states to make them stronger, saying fuck you to the blue states, under the guise of bringing the military into the 21st century.

    While there are some good ideas, it is so so so political.

    A nice big base in Aberdeen Texas. No bases in the Northeast???

    Overthrow the Government ~Vote~

    by missliberties on Sun Aug 21, 2005 at 09:44:50 AM PDT

Permalink | 95 comments