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My Fellow Americans,
Our nation has lost its way. We seem to be stumbling in the dark while our American way of life crumbles around us. This is because the leaders of our nation prefer to be ruled by ideology instead of the common sense we were all born with. Let me give you an example:

One most vexing problem for our lawmakers is illegal immigration. Our lawmakers have suggested several solutions that are all impractical. Those solutions range from building a fence (or fiery mote as Steven Colbert has suggested) to placing National Guard troops along the borders as President Bush has recently done. These ideas all ignore President Bush's basic foreign policy.

The Bush Doctrine clearly states that the United States has the right to wage preemptive war against countries that are a threat to our national security. Porous borders are certainly such a threat. Now is the time to invoke the Bush doctrine and invade Canada and Mexico. Their puny armies would crumble under the superior forces of the United States military. No doubt we would be welcomed as liberators. After the invasions, we could simply make Canada and Mexico US territories with a clear path to statehood.

The benefits to such a solution are manifold. Our southern border with Belize and Guatemala would be much smaller and easier to defend. We get all the cheap labor we need plus the Canadian and Mexican oil reserves. As a bonus, our new citizens to the North might even make us all a little more polite. And the problem of adding all those new stars and stripes to the flag can certainly be solved by a clever American graphic designer.

But our nation's leaders lack the imagination to suggest such common sense solutions. I urge you to call your lawmakers immediately and tell them to stop being ruled by their ideology and start using common sense.

Originally posted to Dallas Dem on Tue Jun 06, 2006 at 09:27 AM PDT.

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