There are so many more important diaries to read that I cannot recommend you read this one. Especially since it sounds like an entry for MySpace... but:
I Just Got Dumped. The hard and cruel kind.
My boyfriend and domestic partner of 5 years just came home from work and announced he's moving out and feels he needs to be on his own. Our anniversary was Halloween. I thought we were very committed and the type of people who would grow old together happily. I was really happy. Now my heart is probably breaking and it's a little hard to breathe. He is amazing, and I guess so am I? I thought he was the love of my life, but now I'll embark on a new journey?
He said he thought of it about two days ago and knew it was the right path. He didn't feel like he could talk to me about it because it isn't a logical thing that breaks down into words - a rut, a feeling of the wrong direction, a need for change. Yeah, I'm shocked and having a different strong emotion every 9 minutes. It's harder, as he lives here, while looking for a new apartment. Ultimately, like all things, it will be for the best.
My advice after the fold:
I really lack perspective because this is so new.
I'm really not an expert advice giver - so take that for what it's worth.
It's just that I see a few things about my part in it and how engrossed and unaccessible I have been for some time now. I blog a lot, I have been really consumed by politics and GOTV. I didn't listen or pay much attention over the last month when he wanted/needed it. Events were making me short tempered compared to usual and I spoke of politics a lot - which, was draining for him. It's best that it's ending; or, at least I will feel that way eventually - I hope to - I'll have to. I don't have a choice in it really.
Please remember no matter how engrossing and important this election cycle - take time for the people you love. I blew it.
I had my eye on this larger political perspective for so long I forgot about the one person who was right here in my world.
Now my best advice (that I can only project in lieu of actually feeling it for the time being) is faith. Faith in yourself. Faith in a positive future - even if your expectations don't always meet your reality.
Give a hug, or drop a line today to someone you care about and I will feel like this experience is something positive and worth getting through.
I don't regret one single minute in my life - even if I don't always succeed at what I attempt or the relationships I choose. At least I'm always moving forward and working for a brighter future?
(sniffle)
Thanks for reading - it means a lot.