So the discussions have begun...and without the prompting of Kos. Who should be our front page diarists next year? Who gets the nod? Diaries have begun to pop up that are love-in mojo fests of "You're great!", "No, you're great!" Kossacks are lobbying for their candidates and starting to write their diaries of support, the online campaigning begins, and the potential candidates are saying, "Oh-thank-you-so-much, I'm so humbled...you LIKE me! You really LIKE me!"
To which I say: Feh. Screw the front page.
That's my mantra and I'm sticking to it.
I'm a mid-lister, man. That's where the shit gets done. That's where we get down and dirty and flit off diaries without a care in the world. We're writing about shit long before it hits the front page, you dig? I've seen diaries break the stories before it makes front page news here on the blog. The front page is the blog's mainstream media to the mid-list's "alternative press".
We don't obsess about things like "facts" or "links" or "blockquotes". We say what is on our minds. And we don't give a shit what the rest of y'all think.
Seriously, put Bob Johnson's dog Rex on the front page. Make it a daily column! I'd actually read that shit. It'd probably scare the bejeesus out of the wingnuts, too...a coherent liberal dog that we could run for President in '08. He'd start making sense in Peoria, know what I mean?
But noooooo...we've got start debating this before the Thanksgiving leftovers are finished. Because we're such a hyper-obsessive bunch of wankers that need, no CRAVE, ranking everyone into their nice little rubrics.
Well, screw it. I'm not participating. Put whoever the hell you want there. I'm going to stay here in the recent diary list working against the man...whoever that man (or woman) may be. We don't need your fancy "front page" with all that insider access, champagne, bon bons, and ego strokes. We like to get our hands dirty, and we don't want no stinkin' reward. We don't have time to research all that crap and worry hours about whether our diaries strike a chord, or are well-reasearched, or all the legitimate "journalism" type stuff.
Keep your nominations and high school student popularity contests to yourself. I'd like more bandwidth to write shit like "John Kerry is Dead to Me" and "Screw the Angry Left...I'm More of a Mildly Pissed Off Progressive".
'Cause that's way more fun.
I ain't praying to the altar of bloggers anytime soon...even if I plan on selling idols of Armando on Ebay (there's got to be a market, right?). All you mojo-loving fools can get back to work, 'cause there's still more to be done.
And when the "blessed" finally get on the front page, bully for you. Make sure to put it on your resume, and on your mantle next to the Honorable Mention trophy from the chess tournament you participated in whilst a fourth grader.
I'll still be here bitching. You can count on that.