(A seven part series.)
It's day five of my weeklong journey into conservatism. By writing this, I have violated a rule of GW Bush. Weeks are only four days long.
Day five: It's the Stupid Economy.
No matter how much money you throw at the economy, it never does what you want it to do. This is because the economy has nothing to do with money. Money is for rich people. The economy is for everyone else. The economy is comprised of two things: statistics, which have been statistically proven to be liars, and bad news. Liars with bad news is not what this country needs. It needs liars with good news.
(more beneath the fold)
All problems with the economy stem from the Democratic Congress. Although the democrats are a minority in Congress they are not a good minority like Condeleeza Rice or Colin Powell when he isn't being uppity. Through their minorityship, the Democrats are able to generate all that is bad in the world including the budget deficit, the insurgency in Iraq and all cars smaller than HumVees.
Social Security, a first class program, needs to be privatized. As a Private First Class, we can send it to Iraq where money is desperately needed to help repair the buildings that were bombed last week so that they can be ready in time to be bombed next week.
Many senior citizens, those who can remember Roosevelt, Truman and Kennedy, voted against Bush. They need to be drugged. Fortunately, with the Medicare Drug Supplement, they will only have to pay half price to be made into zombis.
Free trade will lead to free labor, a good thing. Every day will be Labor Day when all Americans will be on a permanent vacation from their jobs.
Bush is the greatest financial avatar since Hoover who, in his day, rescued our country from the Clinton-era inspired depression.
Bush's economic wisdom is transcendent. It can be summarized as:
Let's go to Mars. Best of all, it's free. Let's invade Iraq. Best of all, it's free. The tax cut will pay for itself. Iraq will pay for itself. The trip to Mars will pay for itself when we sell earth souvenirs to gullible Martians. There IS such a thing as a free lunch: just skip out the back door and leave others at the table to pay for it.
Tomorrow: Day six. The Bush Legacy Continued. Scientism and Religionology.
link to day one, Embracing the Bush Family History:
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2005/8/23/182115/010
link to day two, George W. Bush. A life. Yep.:
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2005/8/24/9412/98786
link to day three, Embracing the 2000 Election:
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2005/8/25/16577/0043
link to day four: The Bush Legacy. Foreign Policy and Terrorism.
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2005/8/26/162146/895