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My dear Elders, beloved GiYUSites, Right-Wing Likudniks,

Today, I am here to offer a status report on our six pointed plan, each point representing a point on our beloved star,

  1.   To make the U.S. invade Iraq.  Mission accomplished.  I'm particularly proud of our accomplishments on this one.  By ensuring that Bush Jr. was elected, everyone is blaming it on his daddy's failure, thus hiding our involvement.
  1.  To control the media to ensure that no one ever hears anything unpleasant about Israel.   Unfortunately, stories about IDF actions in Gaza and Lebanon have gotten out.    We need to work on this so I am asking every last one of you to use your Jew gold to buy up stocks or entire media corporations.   Oh and publish more copies of the fake Protocals in the Arab world, it always makes people suspicious.
  1. To flood Daily Kos with comments the minute someone dares to  criticize Israel because G-d knows that Daily Kos is such an important site that an entire people has to focus our efforts on it.    We need to hire more individuals to join the site and protect Israel's honor.    Our GIYUS site has been compromised.  Our new site will be http://www.whitehouse.gov   Look on the pets page for important news!.
  1. To make sure we control the new U.S. congress.  This was easy.  All American politicians are in our pocket anyway.  
  1.  To equate all criticism of Israel with anti-Semitism.    Every time someone makes a comment about Israel's policies we need to swiftly respond with a claim of anti-Semitism.    After our Mossad agent's wonderful Holocaust denial conference, the anti-Semitism card should play a little easier.
  1. To ethnicly cleanse our beloved land from the Euphrates to the Nile of anyone who is not a Jew through genocide.   This is requiring much subtlety and by allowing the Palestinian population to triple in just 60 short years, we have hidden our work in this area.  Mossad is doing a great job by framing Al Queda for 9/11 and faking all those suicide bombings and Qassams.     It may take us many years to reach this goal but the good news is that we have already developed a method of preserving their children's blood to make matza for a century!

If we all do our part, we will reach our goal within the decade.  I can't think you enough for your dedication.

Originally posted to Pumpkinlove on Sun Dec 31, 2006 at 05:57 PM PST.

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