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2006 DARWIN AWARD WINNERS!

Darwin Awards Condoms:  Keep yourself out of the gene pool.
Darwin Awards Motto:  The Tree of Life is Self-Pruning.
Darwin Awards Hero:  "What would Darwin do?"

2006 DARWIN AWARD WINNERS!

Darwin Awards Condoms:  Keep yourself out of the gene pool.
Darwin Awards Motto:  The Tree of Life is Self-Pruning.
Darwin Awards Hero:  "What would Darwin do?"
 
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2006 RUNNER UP: Copper Kite Darwin Award -- Confirmed
 
"One string short of a kite."  
 
(19 March 2006, Belize) Benjamin Franklin reputedly flew his kite
in a lightning storm, going on to discover that lightning equals
electricity.  However, certain precautions must be taken to avoid
sudden electrocution.  Kennon, 26, replicated the conditions of
Ben Franklin's experiment, but without Ben's sensible safety
precautions.  Dennon was flying a kite with a short string that
he had extended with a length of thin copper wire.
 
The copper made contact with a high-tension line, sending a bolt
of electrical lightning towards the man.  Just bad luck?
Kennon's father told listeners his son was an electrician, and
"should have known better."  Kennon is survived by his parents,
six sisters, and five brothers.
 
Vote!
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2006 RUNNER UP: Hammer of Doom Darwin Award -- Confirmed

August brought us a winner from Brazil, who tried to disassemble
a Rocket Propelled Grenade (RPG) by driving back and forth over
it with a car. This technique was ineffective, so he escalated to
pounding the RPG with a sledgehammer.  The second try worked--in
a sense.  The explosion proved fatal to one man, six cars, and
the repair shop wherein the efforts took place.

14 more RPG grenades were found in a car parked nearby. Police
believe the ammunition was being scavenged to sell as scrap
metal. If it wasn't scrap then, it certainly is now!

Vote!
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And the 2006 DARWIN AWARD Winner is...

HIGH ON LIFE: "Take a deep breath..."

(3 June 2006, Florida) Two more candidates have thrown themselves
into the running for a Darwin Award. The feet of Jason and Sara,
both 21, were found protruding from a deflated, huge helium
advertising balloon. Jason was a college student, and Sara
attended community college, but apparently their education had
glossed over the importance of oxygen.

When one breathes helium, the lack of oxygen in the bloodstream
causes a rapid loss of consciousness.  Some euthanasia experts
advocate the use of helium to painlessly end one's life.
The pair pulled down the 8' balloon, and climbed inside. Their
last words consisted of high-pitched, incoherent giggling as they
slowly passed out and passed into the hereafter.

Sheriff's deputies said the two were not victims of foul play. No
drugs or alcohol were found. The medical examiner reported that
helium inhalation was a significant factor in their deaths. A
family member said "Sara was mischievous, to be honest. She liked
fun and it cost her."
 
OVER 50 SUBMISSIONS
Vote!
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Darwin Awards Haiku:
      Dude had a screw loose.
      Glad he didn't reproduce.
      Darwin saves the day!

               Stupidity kills.
               Absolute stupidity
               kills absolutely.

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The Darwin Awards 4: Intelligent Design (get it? heh heh)
Available wherever fine books are offered to the public!
 
The Darwin Awards Movie is coming in 2007, probably as soon as
the summer!!!  More information: http://movie.darwinawards.com

Also See:  Stubbed Out
Faithful Flotation
Score for Goliath

DARWIN AWARDS: Chlorinating the Gene Pool.
DARWIN AWARDS: Gene Pool Belly Flops.
DARWIN AWARDS: Die and Learn.
DARWIN AWARDS: You are the weakest link!
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Copyright 2006 www.DarwinAwards.com.

Originally posted to DARWIN AWARDS the Evolution Revolution on Wed Jan 03, 2007 at 02:51 PM PST.

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