"Yeah, two lesbians kissing is HOT!"
This is a comment I've seen made here often enough that I want to explain something about it. I saw it numerous times in the demographic poll on sexuality. I saw it most recently in Bill in Portland Maine's diary about the Snickers ads in the super bowl, but this isn't about that particular poster, or the poster who replied with "thanks for posting what I didn't have the onions to post." (Onions=balls, right?)
I'm going to assume that most if not all of the folks who post these comments consider themselves to be relatively enlightened guys. Maybe it's done in a sort of semi-ironic Beavis & Butthead humor kind of way - ie, you know it's a bit obnoxious, but you think it's kind of funny to be obnoxious on purpose. Or maybe you just like to talk about your sexual fantasies.
Either way, it's not so good. Here's why.
Some caveats: I'm all in favor of sex, and of sexual fantasies. Anything you want to fantasize about in the privacy of your own home (or your favorite internet porn site, or your local swingers party) is really, really fine with me.
But you're doing some troubling things when your response to anything more or less LGBT-related is "lesbians kissing is hot!"
You're reducing an entire group of women to sexual objects. Think of any other group-identifying adjective you could place before women, and see if it's something you would post - even if it really were your fantasy.
(all) "Latina women are hot!"
(all) "Disabled women are hot!"
(all) "Working-class women are hot!"
(all) "Moms are hot!"
You see how that would be a problem, right?
"But wait!" you say. "Lesbians are all about making out with each other, so what's the matter with saying that's hot?"
The problem is, lesbians don't make out with each other for your pleasure. I've been a lesbian, and I'm quite sure about this one. Also, despite what feminist theories suggest you may subconsciously or consciously believe, lesbians can have really hot sex without you being involved in any way.
Just like (well, probably somewhat more than) any other group of women, queer women as a group are not generally into being objectified by men they don't know.
And while there are lots of hot dykes of all sorts, my guess is that what you really mean when you bring up "lesbians kissing" is not actual lesbians, but porn actresses who perform woman-on-woman sex, or your two favorite super-models. What you're really doing is equating "lesbian" with male fantasy object.
And if every time lesbianism/gayness/queerness comes up, you bring out your fantasies... well, it's just icky. And besides that, it reduces lesbianism to a category of porn, rather than the real identity and experience of real people. And it changes the subject from whatever substantive L, G, B or T issue might have been under discussion.
And that's the main thing, really - it wouldn't bother me so much to see "lesbians = hot!" on a thread about, you know, what we think is hot. (If there were such a thread.) Like I said, you can fantasize any way you like. But your fantasies about fictionalized versions of lesbians don't belong on threads about LGBT issues, any more than your fantasies about women in nice suits would belong on a thread about Nancy Pelosi.