This is the silver-bullet climate change technology solution we have been waiting for! I have just invented the most energy-efficient vehicle ever. Near-zero emissions! It is compatible with existing fuel stations, and drivers can also very easily carry their own fuel. My design is one hundred times less expensive than conventional automobiles! The vehicle is low-maintenance and inexpensive to repair. Its compact, space-saving design will eliminate traffic jams in all but the most severely crowded areas. It is so compact that we frequently won't need to set aside dedicated parking facilities for it. As if this wasn't enough, it will address major public health problems too!!! Move over Thomas Edison, move over Henry Ford, I am the new Great American Inventor for the 21st Century! Buy my Rookie Card now while you can still afford it!
I call my invention the "bicycle":
With a human driver on board, the "bicycle" looks like this:
This vehicle is the most energy-efficient vehicle ever created! Not even the swimming salmon (#2) or the human walking is as efficient as this! (link) This vehicle will slash the greenhouse gas emissions of the transport sector, which are almost as large as emissions from livestock! (link)
This vehicle is significantly smaller and more compact than a conventional automobile. Already, I have signed deals with the Departments of Transportation in Washington State, Colorado, Minnesota, California, and Florida among others to introduce my technology as a means of reducing traffic congestion and have received interest from the Federal Highway Administration, which writes:
Vice President Gore launched a Livability Initiative in 1999 with the ironic statement that "a gallon of gas can be used up just driving to get a gallon of milk."
My standard design is compatable for single-user travel, which is the most common form (link, link). A variant of this actually places the driver in an enclosed structure. I call this version the velomobile. I also have invented custom designs that can handle two people or more! I have bicycles specially equipped to carry people as passengers, which I call the "cycle rickshaw", which works like a taxi except with near-zero emissions! I even have an ulta-state-of-the art 15-person vehicle I call the "buscycle"! Mass transit will never be the same!
For those carrying large amounts of cargo, I offer special versions of my "bicycle" with extra-large storage capacity for all your cargo carrying needs. Examples of my cargo bicycles can be found here, here, here, and here.
As you can see, I already have a sophisticated global distribution operation in place.
My "bicycle" also costs only a small fraction of what today's "automobile" costs! (link, link, link) The cost-conscious traveller should look no further! Leave the automobile to rust in the junkyard of the past, and drive yourself a shiny new or used bicycle into the 21st century!
...To "pre-buttal" some common criticism:
- Yes, bikes top out around 15mph; cars around 80mph. But within cities, the two often fair the same. The shortest travel times are often non-car trips within higher-density, mixed-use "smart growth" cities, where the distances to be traveled are small. (My current commute is a 15-minute walk through Boston- I'm actually too close for it to be worth dragging my bicycle outside.)
- For longer trips, busses and especially trains are the best options. Take naps, read, work, etc while traveling! I think we should build up Amtrak to world-class standards. (Planes are less efficient, but are of course required for the longest of trips.)
- Yes, cars are useful for certain circumstances, especially carrying very heavy cargo and getting to remote, far-off places. But these are a small minority of trips.
- Bikes aren't always comfortable given the weather. Not everyone will bike year-round in Rochester, NY. (Snow biking rules!) Being able to walk and take transit are important options.
- Not everyone can bike (such as those not strong/agile/etc enough). True. For these people, walking and transit are again good options. Some of these people also can't drive, e.g. the blind, and we should accomodate these people too. Finally, no one under 16 can drive. While they make up a relatively small portion of the electorate (uh, zero percent), that's a huge portion of the population reduced to passenger status; parents are in turn reduced to chauffeurs.