First a touch of spur-of-the-moment humor followed by today's main course:
Rumor has it that it's now down to just George and Laura. No more Barney. It apparently happened this way. George started bawling his head off in the White House living quarters because 'everyone expects me to be so damn perfect" and then he slipped to his knees, possibly in prayer, maybe exhaustion or something he ingested...
At the moment Laura entered the doorway to see what the commotion was, she spied Barney hike his leg and urinate on Bush.The question now is this: might there the equivalent of Guantanamo Bay for canines? All reporters have been able to learn is that Alberto Gonzales says such would be legal regardless of who committed a terrorist act as enemy combatants can be non-human.
Okay, here's an attempt at 'serious humor' if such an onymoron exists. We've kept some of the following song titles as is and 'adjusted' a few others. But heck, we guarantee that all are reality-based. See for yourself as we match up favorite and not-so-favorite song titles to some of those in the news.
* For Alberto (Sancho Panza) Gonzales -- "I Fought The Law..." this is the only part he sings as he either doesn't know or simply refuses to continue on with "...and the Law Won."
* For Tony Snow -- "It's Hard Out Here For A Pimp" What the press sings in reply is "Dr. Heckyll and Mr. Jive"
* For Dick Cheney -- what else but "I Shot The Sheriff but gosh, at least I didn't shoot the Deputy...yet"
* For George Bush -- fast becoming his mantra is "I Will Survive" It used to be "With A Little Help From My Friends"
* For Condoleeza Rice when dreamily thinking of her 'husband' George Bush - "I Will Always Love You" and yes, Harriet Meiers oftentimes joins her in a duet
* For the Shia and Sunni in certain Bagdad neighborhoods -- "Another Brick In The Wall" That is, when they aren't, with double helpings of irony, singing "Another Day In Paradise" or "Neverending Story"
* George Bush to Angela Merkel -- "I Want to Hold Your Hand" and "Light My Fire"
* Newly applicable but highly unlikely for Paul Wolfowitz to be singing -- "Another One Bites The Dust"
* Here's what many are singing behind George Bush's back -- "A King Without A Crown" and "(No) Sympathy For The Devil"
* For George Bush, Dick Cheney, Donald Rumsfeld, Doug Feith, Richard Perle, Bill Kristol, James Woolsey, et al, -- "Don't Stop Believin'" or "All I Have To Do Is Dream" or even sometimes, with a little creative re-working, "Making War Out Of Nothing At All"
* For the U.N. inspectors in Iraq way back when -- "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Lookin' For"
* For the U.S, military personnel in Iraq and Iraqi citizens -- "Stayin' Alive"
* Yet again for George Bush alluding to everything he touches -- "Appetite For Destruction"
* Applicable to George Bush and sung by all -- "Hail To The Thief" and "Total Eclipse of the Heart and Head"
* Dissenters of the conventional wisdom about the expected ease of invading Iraq- - "That'll Be The Day" These same people were spot-on accurate when they sang of Dubya as "The Great Pretender"
* What the Bush parents obviously forgot to teach Dubya -- "You Can't Always Get What You Want"
* What the American public needs to repeat and repeat and repeat -- "Won't Get Fooled Again"
* No answer and a no vacancy sign is what Goorge Bush gets when he finds himself "Knockin' On Heaven's Door"
And finally, with a small editorial change, the entire world gleefully singing "Bush on the Run"