We are being called.
All of us.
But more than others, we graying baby-boomers are being called to fulfill the promises we made in that shining moment of our youth when life was full of possibility, danger, and the chance to make a difference for ourselves and others by opposing the corruption of the old order.
Lets forget for a moment about sex, drugs and rock and roll. Lets put Woodstock, Monterey and Altamont aside, let Haight and Ashbury be just an intersection in a not so great part of San Francisco, and lets remember what was important then as now. And let us rise to reclaim the legacies we squandered: Birmingham, Sproul Plaza, Kent State, Chicago, places where we were called to risk our lives and futures for something other than power, money or the safety of silence. Let us risk again because we must.
Perhaps its because I, at 59, having ridden the waves, and wallowed in the troughs between, look backward at my own life and see more missed opportunities to make a difference than successful attempts at securing my own future. Perhaps its because I am 'wired' to be depressive, overly self-critical, envious and desirous that I now see ahead only an inexorable, accelerating slide into the inevitable losses that age brings. Or it may be that I fear I will not be able to muster the strength and commitment to lean against the helm of life's ship and bring her course right again, on to Ithaca— wherever that may in reality be. Whatever the case, the voyage ahead will demand more than I think it will. And since God isn't my personal co-pilot, it will be up to me, and those who sail with me to make it happen.
I fear that for too long, and in too many ways I have turned away from the horror of our unraveling sense of humanity, our common purposefulness to achieve not only for ourselves, but for others good as well, something of meaning and lasting useful value. Even though I have considered myself a liberal or progressive, have voted that way, supported my candidates and causes with money, it seems a weak effort in the face of our current crises. And though my youthful sentiment and outrage faltered before the looming cascade of life's demands, the energies which informed and animated that younger self have not yet fully fled.
I feel them rising once again in response to a momentous peril, to a make-or-break moment in the history of our nation, culture and society. The cycle is grinding its way toward a crisis and will demand that those of us who once held the courage of our convictions to again rise. We must, if we are to reclaim our moral authority and engage our children and their children in ways that ensure we will overcome the gravitational pull of our darker natures that threatens to pull us and the world as a whole into an irreversible death spiral.
We have become the old order that must be overthrown.
The values of this nation articulated in our constitution are under attack from within more than without. The distractions of security have overwhelmed our capacity for reason and compromise. Our leaders have become the mirror of our worse selves—petty, lying, greedy and bloodthirsty. We have allowed them and ourselves the luxuries of complacency in the face of global threats of our own making: the environment, geo-political hegemonies, exploitation of resources, ignorance of cultural and ethnic liabilities, human rights, and the toleration of intolerance by any and all. Without a re-commitment to the principles of basic human decency, justice and opportunity we may prevail, but we will not win. Rather , we'll only hasten the decline that cannot be undone.
We have given over the authority to rectify our selves and our nation to the other. If we fail to reclaim our own voice, someone other than ourselves will speak and act for us, as they are now, creating the conditions we find ourselves facing as a price for our acquiescence. What is at stake is not only our own humanity, but the salvation of all that has come before us, supported and nurtured us, given us shelter and a place where we might be safe enough to choose not to speak up.
Such irony—the conditions of our freedoms threaten to undo them. The wealth that supports our growth, undermines our growth. The institutions we've created to preserve our democracy are used to destroy it.
Our safety and freedom are now clearly in danger, and the paradox is that I must risk both psychological and physical security I have come to expect to make the changes needed if I am to live with any modicum of respect. To establish equilibrium, the old balances must be undone. Everything depends on us individually and collectively, and it must be done alone and together.
So I am being called. Called to greater awareness and to the action that awareness demands. Late in life perhaps, but better late than never. What have I got to lose besides my false security? What can be recovered? Real freedom, dignity and self-respect.