I expect to be troll rated to extinction for this diary, but my conscience dictates that I fill in the blanks for you about a lot of the bad things that happened at YearlKos. I think this is necessary so that we don't get a false feeling of security about our own power and about part of the true personality of the overall Kos community. There truly WERE some bad things that happend at the Chicago YearlyKos Convention. If you go below the fold, you won't have to read much of my litany of shame to get the gist of my diary and decide whether to heed my words, or tell me to get the hell off of DailyKos (at which time I will post a brief GBCW diary).
Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate.
First off, there was not enough hate. For a hatefest, the Kossacks in attendance were truly pathetic. Except for a rumored dustup with the Politico people, a soldier in uniform illegally (according to the UCMJ) acting as a political partisan, and that lady from New York who got on the elevator going the wrong way (she dropped only two "F" bombs), everyone was pathetically civil and polite. You people really suck at hatred.
Second, Howard Dean did not wear a tie. Now I'm not saying he should get a $400 tie or anything, but geez, how pathetic is it that one of our greatest voices of the Democratic Party should stoop so low to wear slacks and a white shirt and no frikkin' tie! Again, pathetic.
And not to diss Dr. Dean, he also said the word "idears" twice. Can't this guy speak proper English? This alone was damning enough to cast a shadow over the entire conference.
Third, there were no cardboard standees of Markos. If you wanted a picture with Markos, you actually had to find the guy. This indicates a severe lack of planning and no understanding of convention logistics. Again, PATHETIC!!!!
Fourth, Markos forgot to disseminate the daily talking points. When I was interviewed by a reporter from the Boston Globe at the Clinton breakout session, I actually had to express my own thoughts and opinions. Given that none of my quotes were used in her article, it's obvious that the lack of talking points hurt our Kos cause. Might I suggest next year at least one early morning email during the conference telling us what to think next time? The lack of proactive message control was truly pathetic.
Fifth, the loofah was way too small. I repeat, the loofah was way too small. Bigger loofahs next year, ok?
Sixth, when polls were projected on the big screen (text message voting enabled) not once, I say, NOT ONCE was "pie" a choice. The organizers must be noobs who didn't realize that it is the God given RIGHT of every Kossack to have "pie" as a choice in every poll ever presented. More pie please.
Seventh, that canned Dick Durbin speech? It was like watching an old Godzilla movie. The lip synching was absolutely awful. I'll give the convention organizers a break given the possibility that the giant Durbin on the screen at least resembled Godzilla a bit.
Finally, the guy in the comedy group (Freedom Toast) who played Dick Cheney was WAY too scary. We all know that Kossacks are, above all, a group of fearful drama queens. Playing on our fears for the sake of comedy was, frankly, pathetic.
Thank you for allowing me to use this forum to expose the true cesspool of the YearlyKos convention. I'm glad that this will be the LAST such convention.
Requiescat in pace you non-tie wearing, fearful drama queen, hateful hating haters. I hate you all.