Iraqi adviser calls Cheney “scurvy little spider”
Fri Oct 19, 2007 at 09:57:22 AM PDT
In a turn of events that seemed inevitable to many of us years ago, but is sure to cause all sorts of Neo-Con agitation, Iraqi National Security Adviser Mowaffak Al-Rubaie has declared that Iraq will not accept a permanent American military presence. The official goals of the invasion were debunked a long time ago, but now Cheney must be realizing that even his secret goals are not going to be achieved. One part of the story I really liked was how it says that “That message was delivered directly to Vice President Dick Cheney at the White House.” Eliminate the middleman, and all that.
Below the fold is how I imagine a brief conversation would go between Al-Rubaie, a neurologist by training, and Vice-President Cheney.
Iraqi National Security Adviser, Mowaffak Al-Rubaie: “The people of Iraq, the Parliament, the Council of Representative and the government of Iraq, all say no, big fat no, N, O, No military bases for Iraq because we believe that is in direct encroachment to our sovereignty, and we don’t need it.” [actual quote - Ed.]
Vice President Dick Cheney: “You don’t need it? You don’t need it? I own you! It doesn’t matter if you need it!”
Iraqi National Security Adviser, Mowaffak Al-Rubaie: “What Iraq needs is housing for our own people, we don’t need billion dollar outposts for our allies to live in!”
Vice President Dick Cheney: “Ingrate! Without my support, the rabble in your country will tear you and your government to bits!”
Iraqi National Security Adviser, Mowaffak Al-Rubaie: “This rabble you're talking about... they do most of the working and paying and living and dying in this community. Well, is it too much to have them work and pay and live and die in a couple of decent rooms and a bath? Anyway, my father didn’t think so. People were human beings to him. But to you, a warped, frustrated old man, they're cattle. Well, in my book he died a much richer man than you'll ever be.”
Vice President Dick Cheney: “Cattle? Look at you. You used to be so cocky. You were going to go out and conquer the world. You once called me ‘a warped, frustrated, old man!’ What are you but a warped, frustrated young man? A miserable little clerk crawling in here on your hands and knees and begging for help. No securities, no stocks, no bonds. Nothin’ but a miserable little $500 equity in a life insurance policy.”
Iraqi National Security Adviser, Mowaffak Al-Rubaie: “But at least I aspire to be a sovereign warped, frustrated young man! What are you but an appendage of the corporations that own your soul?”
Vice President Dick Cheney: “A miserable little clerk crawling in here on your hands and knees and begging for help. No securities, no stocks, no bonds. Nothin’ but a miserable little $500 equity in a life insurance policy. You’re worth more dead than alive!”
Iraqi National Security Adviser, Mowaffak Al-Rubaie: “You sit around here and you spin your little webs and you think the whole world revolves around you and your money. Well, it doesn’t, Mr. Cheney. In the whole vast configuration of things, I’d say you were nothing but a scurvy little spider!”
[Mowaffak Al-Rubaie exits. Cheney calls Chief of Staff David Addington into his office.]
Vice President Dick Cheney: “David. I told Al-Rubaie that he was worth more dead than alive.”
Chief of Staff David Addington: “Yes, Mr. Cheney.”
Vice President Dick Cheney: “Make it so.”
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