Finally, a general on active duty in Iraq who UNDERSTANDS!
In Turkey, pressure builds to attack Iraq
http://www.latimes.com/...
By Tracy Wilkinson, Los Angeles Times Staff Writer
October 27, 2007
ISTANBUL, TURKEY --
...For days, tens of thousands of Turkish troops have been massing along the 200-mile southern border with Iraq, and commandos have entered several miles into Iraq in hot pursuit of rebels. Combat helicopters and F-16 fighter planes daily attack suspected guerrilla hide-outs and escape routes...
...On Friday, Army Maj. Gen. Benjamin Mixon, the commander of U.S. forces in northern Iraq, said he planned to do "absolutely nothing" to counter (Kurdish rebel) activity, and that he was neither tracking the rebels' movements nor reinforcing the military presence in the region.
(continued)
This guy’s my new favorite general. He’s the man who should be in charge of the US armed presence in Iraq. He should replace Petraeus. Hell, he should be the next president! Because he’s the only guy over there who actually seems to appreciate the dimensions of what is going on in Iraq; the implications.
"Sir! Turkish troops are crossing the Iraqi border and attacking Kurdish rebels! The Kurds are returning fire! What shall we do?"
"Absolutely nothing!"
"But sir—"
"What part of that military directive did you not understand, son? We're in enough fucking trouble in this country as it is! You don't think we have enough enemies, already? Listen! If the Turks start rolling across the border with tanks and aircraft and firing on the Kurds, and the Kurds start firing back--the standing order for you and the rest of our troops is to do absolutely nothing! I think that’s the clearest order I’ve ever given in my entire career, soldier, there's nothing for you to misunderstand!"
"But we can’t just stand here and let them overrun our postions—"
"Yes we can! And we will, so long as I am in command of this operation—and I am! You are not to interfere with either Turkish or Kurdish engagements in this theater, you let them kill each other, not our troops, do—you—understand—what—I—am—tellin’—you?"
"Yes, sir. But are we simply supposed to sit back and watch as they—"
"I don’t care! I don’t care if our troops stand back and watch or not! They can stand back and watch, they can sit down and watch on CNN in the barracks, or they can watch "Gilligan’s Island", for all I care. But the one thing I can not and will not tolerate is someone getting us into the middle of YET ANOTHER fucking shooting war between local hostiles! With the Turkish Army, yet, can you believe it? What’s next, the Albanian fucking Coast Guard? Is this water? Get me some ice—"
"But if we see that they are—"
"Pretend that you DON’T see them! Pretend we are busy doing something else, building a hospital, sweeping up or something—just let them go by! Pretend we are shepherds watching our flocks by night! If they wave as they go by--don’t even wave back! Pretend you don’t KNOW what’s going on, and that even if you did, you JUST DON’T WANT TO GET INVOLVED!! Those are the "rules of engagement" in this particular theater! "DON’T ENGAGE!" That’s "the rules!"
"What if they fire at us?"
"Why the hell would they want to fire at us, major? They’re already fighting each other! But if they do—and if AND ONLY IF they do—tell our troops they have my permission to DUCK—AND THAT’S IT! If I catch one stupid son-of-a-bitch firing one single round without my personal permission in advance—I’ll court-martial his ass on the spot! Dishonorable discharge! NO, even better—I’ll embed him with a Kurdish militia unit! If I catch anyone firing even ONE shot, they go straight into a Kurdish militia unit. Sunnis and Shi’ites down south aren’t enough for him, he wants to fight Turks and Kurds now, too—fine! Fine, tell him to put on a different uniform and go fight if he wants, but for Christ’s sake don’t drag the rest of us into yet another military shithole."
"But don’t we have a strategy for this eventuality, sir?"
"YES! As a matter of fact, I do have a strategy for this eventuality! I wrote it out a year ago, because I knew if we weren’t out of Iraq by now the Turks were going to invade to prevent the creation of a Kurdish state! Everybody with more than half a brain saw that one coming—so I wrote up a "big plan," look, here it is—(pulls bound report out of his desk) Here it is, it’s all about what we should do in case the Turks get involved in this war, too! This is my plan, it’s called "Operation Don’t Do A Fucking Thing If The Turks Get Involved In This War, Too, Because Then We’ll Be In An Even Deeper Military Shithole Than The One Bush Has Got Us In Right Now!" Catchy title, eh? Do you want to know what I call my plan for what to do if we start fighting IRAN, now, too?"
"No, sir."
"You’re damn right you don’t. You’re smarter than you look, major. Now get the fuck out of here. And don't--do--anything! Absolutely nothing! And that's an ORDER!"