Your Favorite Candidate Can't Sing for Sh*t

John McCain would totally freakin' pwn and/or serve your favorite candidate in the finale.

If McCain were a giant oak tree, your favorite candidate would sound like a bundle of sticks falling in the forest when nobody's around to hear it compared to him.

Exhibit A: Hillary Clinton
               ^{aka "HRC", aka "Her Royal Clinton", aka "Right Triangle", aka "The Keeper of the Gates", aka "MC DLC", aka "VRWC Inc."}

Exhibit B: Barack Obama
               ^{aka "The Quick Brown FOX", aka "N*Danger", Secret Service Codename: Mr. BOjangles}

Exhibit C: John Edwards
               ^{aka "Lil' Millworker", aka "The Prince and the Pauper", aka "Southern Comfort"}

Exhibit D: Dennis Kucinich
               ^{aka "M-Peach", aka "Mulder", aka "The Keebler"}

NOTE: None of the other candidates bothered to show up for my YouTube talent search.

•  Tips

  

  by Trix on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 04:06:57 AM PDT

•  "Wockets Wed Gware"

  http://www.rollingstone.com/...

  by Theghostofkarlafayetucker on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 04:12:27 AM PDT

  •  ...and fish in the sky,

    ...and a big... monkey pie...

    by keirdubois on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 06:58:58 AM PDT

•  I was having a bad morning

  until I read... errrr.... listened to this.

  Thanks. I needed that.

  by Timroff on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 04:13:09 AM PDT

  •  It's like I always say...

    A bowl of Trix is better than a cup of Joe.

    by Trix on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 04:16:22 AM PDT

•  Wockets Wed Gware ! C & L had this link up yest.

  About the trainwreck of Fred Thompson's big opening splash in Iowa, highlights your "bad singing theme"...by Matt Taibbi

  http://www.rollingstone.com/...

  by Theghostofkarlafayetucker on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 04:15:27 AM PDT

  •  I'm a Matt Taibbi fan...

    I'm definitely gonna read the article.

    Thanks for the link.

    :-)

    by Trix on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 04:17:08 AM PDT

    •  Looks like feedback on the tubes this morn nt

      by Theghostofkarlafayetucker on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 04:23:19 AM PDT

    •  Me too

      I actually just got "Smells like Dead Elephants" and highly enjoyed it.

      by keirdubois on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 07:00:11 AM PDT

•  Well, at least one candidate

  had the humility to be a backup singer :)

  by kyril on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 04:29:41 AM PDT

•  If that's how they sing...

  I don't want to see 'em dancing.

  by The Raven on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 04:36:03 AM PDT

  •  Giuliani can out burlesque the lot of them :) n/t

    by Trix on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 04:37:25 AM PDT

    •  rofl

      Worst mental image of the day... so far.

      I'm trying to imagine him in "Cabaret".

      by Plutonium Page on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 06:01:30 AM PDT

•  Can Fred Thompson have a round of applause?

  by Trix on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 04:41:10 AM PDT

•  Pat Paulsen for President

  Censored 1974 Merv Griffin Show appearance.

  by Trix on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 05:04:28 AM PDT

  •  Dude....

    ...

    You = Controversy Magnet.

    by malharden on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 05:45:58 AM PDT

    •  It's all good bro...

      I consulted the "Should I Use Blackface On My Blog" flowchart before posting.

      :-)

      by Trix on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 05:49:43 AM PDT

      •  But seriously...

        that's a historical document concerning a perennial presidential candidate/social satirist... it's not even the same zip code as the Harvey Milk incident.

        by Trix on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 05:52:18 AM PDT

        •  I know. Not your fault.

          Some of us are just a tad sensitive at the moment. Not your fault.

          by malharden on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 07:10:12 AM PDT

          •  Cool

            check out that flowchart link I posted upthread... it's very funny... and totally non-offensive.

            :-)

            by Trix on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 07:13:53 AM PDT

      •  That belongs

        in some blog hall of fame.  I love how Chapelle gets a pass.  ROFLMAO!  Thanks!

        by jlynne on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 08:52:04 PM PDT

•  It says something sad about us...

  ...as a nation, that none of our representatives can sing a lick.

  A hundred years ago, community singing was one of the most important social activities for a huge number of Americans.  Now music is something we buy, not something we do.

  by WarrenS on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 06:42:31 AM PDT

•  It's a damn good thing that

  singing ability is not a prerequisite.  We'd end up with this guy for President:

  ARRRRGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!

  by jlynne on Tue Oct 30, 2007 at 08:54:56 PM PDT