Crossing the lightrail tracks with a bit of ham, a couple slices of deli cheese, and a "fresh-baked" piece of bread in hand, I turned into the mid-street stop. The little guard rails protect both myself and other passangers from the cars whizzing by on both sides of the rail that runs down the middle of the street. I sighed, because, in front of me stood an impressive array of some four high school kids decked out in their bling but carrying clipboards.
This has been going on for months, and I've developed several tactics to deal with them:
The Homeless Ignorance
The first trick is to use the same method you do when there's the homeless guy on the street that you don't want to talk to. Avert your eyes, look straight ahead, and just keep walking. I have trouble with this one, mostly because I don't do good at ignoring anyone -- I usually have enough curtesy to lie to the homeless people and tell them I don't have any change. Though, when they ask if I can spare a dollar, I can honestly answer, "No," because, in all reality, I'm poor as hell too. Which leads into...
The Response
Sometimes, like me, you end up speaking to them. The trick here is not to engage them. Just answer their question, say "No, thanks." Maybe "Not right now," or even just hold up your hand and shake your head in that ever-understood, "No, stop, don't bother, and go away, please." gesture.
Engage Them
You could also stop whatever it is you're doing, and give a well-reasoned response. You could even agree, and give them what they want (only once). You could say no after all this, but that's just mean.
Toy With Them
Sometimes, you know more than they do. Actually, if you're reading this, and you care, you probably do know more than they do. Enjoy your brief intellectual superiority and verbally bat them around like a cat does a mouse before going in for the kill. Or, just walk away when you grow bored.
These are the methods I've developed to deal with those so, so annoying signature-gatherers.
Here in Oregon, we've farmed out the legislative responsibility to the citizens themselves. Citizens draft initiatives, gather signatures, and, if enough signatures are gathered, the initiative makes it to the ballot. We even passed a law that said you can't pay signature gatherers based on the number of signatures they gather, so as to discourage forgeries or multiple-signings.
What it all means is, for roughly the first seven months of an election year, Oregon citizens are accosted in every public place by an army of clipboard-bearing, paid-by-the-hour highschoolers unendingly.
I'd just like to celebrate the fact that, at 5 o'clock, Friday, July 7, the deadline to turn in signatures for various initiatives passed. I actually stayed home Friday, away from the bus stops, in fear that I would murder someone if they asked me to sign anything again.
In case you're wondering, a quick look at what the Secretary of State says about the issue (pdf) on some of the good stuff:
- #57 - Prevents a public body from condemming private property if the intention is to convey it to a private party. Gathered: 136,939, Required: 75,630
- #24 - Oregon Supreme Court & Court of Appeals Judges to be elected by district - Gathered: 174,553, Required: 100,840
- #102 - Requires specificed corporations to file a statement containing tax-related information into the public record. Gathered: 83,937, Required: 75,630
- #23 - Prohibits insurance companies from using credit score/credit worthiness to calculate premiums. Gathered: 133,597, Required: 75,630
- #51 - 48 Hr. notice to parents of a minor before abortion. Also allows for lawsuits and physician discipline. Gathered: 115,845, Required: 75,630
- #122 - Allows Oregon residents w/o Prescription coverage to participate in the Oregon Prescription Drug Program. Gathered: 127,944, Required: 75,630
- #40 - Requires Access to Health Care as Fundamental Right, Legislature adopts a plan expanding Health Care; Constitutional Amendment. Gathered: 115,845, Required: 100,840
- #37 - Campaign Finance Reform, adds disclosure, limits/prohibits contributions, more reporting requirements. Gathered: 124,522, Required: 75,630
- #6 - Limits State Spending increase to a percentage of population increase plus inflation. Gathered: 161,652, Required: 100,840.
Now. Most of the time, if you have a really, really, really, really good stretch of luck, you'll have roughly 75% of the signatures deemed valid. Reasons for disqualificaton include things like "already signed" and "not a registered Oregon voter". That said, my guesses:
- 57 - Yes
- 24 - Yes
- 102 - No
- 23- Yes
- 51- Yes
- 122- Yes
- 40 - No
- 37- Yes
- 6- Yes
(and wow, that's longer than I thought it'd be, and you know what, I'm not spell-checking!)