Washington Post TV columnist Lisa de Moraes does a fantastic job this morning with her story on the complaints received by the FCC about the Olympics ceremonies on NBC (
Opening Ceremony: The IX Olympic Gripes). Wondering what people would have found to complain about? Apparently the latest assault on American culture is...Greek Culture. De Moraes, who can rival Bill in Portland Maine for snark quality, describes the source of their consternation:
Non-fans of women's breasts are very well represented among those who communicated with the FCC about NBC's Olympics coverage. But, reassuringly, there is also a good representation among male genitalia skeptics. Some even fall into both the non-breast and non-genitalia camps. One such asked, rhetorically, "How could NBC be allowed to show the male genitalia on national television" during the opening ceremonies.
"I am referring to when the giant white mask that broke apart into a statue of a nude man," the writer explained. (Actually, the writer is referring to the gigantic replica of a Cycladic head, so popular around 2700 B.C., that broke apart to reveal a replica of a Kouros sculpture, all the rage around the 6th century B.C. See photo.)
"First we had to be subjected to the breast of Janet Jackson in the Superbowl an [sic] now an even more gratuitous display of pornography an [sic] indecency during what was suppose [sic] to be another family viewing event," this writer concluded.
Rest assured, there were plenty of modern offenses to complain about during that family viewing event: women's beach volleyball.
In reading the filings, it would appear some of our Games competitors -- a few members of the women's beach volleyball team, to be exact -- are disciples of Vice President Cheney to the extent that in the excitement of competition they used the same word he used in the excitement of a photo shoot on the floor of the U.S. Senate last June.
Ironically, technical advances have allowed networks to provide more "ambient sound" at sporting events to help viewers feel more like they're actually there. Grievously, when you're actually there, you are made aware that all athletes appear to have been raised by truck drivers.
You have to wonder why these viewers were even watching the women's beach volleyball event, since attractive women in swimsuits seem to be destroying America:
Still another letter focused on NBC's profile of swimmer Amanda Beard during the Games, in which she is described as a sex symbol, a notion supported by a slo-mo video of Beard emerging from a pool. <snip>
"Instead of celebrating the greatness of mankind as represented by the Olympic spirit, [NBC] showed pictures designed to incite lust and immorality -- roots of many of the social ills facing our nation today," the writer penned.
I'm sure these writers were just about to turn off the TV and pick up their bibles, but they felt the need to write the government to protect the rest of us from being force to witness what they themselves had just seen.
It is on this note that I would like to point out yesterday's wp.com article from Terry Neal: GOP Corporate Donors Cash In on Smut.
In this world of irony, corporate leaders at companies as diverse as News Corp., Marriott International and Time Warner can profit by selling red state consumers the very material that red state culture is supposed to despise. Those elites then funnel the proceeds to the GOP, which in turn has used the money to successfully convince red state voters that the other political party is solely responsible for the decline of the civilization.
Yes, it seems that the red areas of red states are giving their donations to the Republican Party in a roundabout way: they buy porn, which goes to corporate America, which gives to the Republicans, who rant about porn. Rupert Murdoch himself profits hugely from the porn industry, raking in literally hundreds of millions of dollars through DirectTV and EchoStar. More money than Larry Flynt and Hugh Heffner combined, actually. You think all that money is coming from blue states? Consider one Utah case:
Randy Spencer was the attorney that the court appointed to defend a the Movie Buff video store in American Fork from local prosecutors who had charged the store's owner with 15 counts of pornography for renting tapes such as "Jugsy," "Young Buns II" and "Sex Secrets of High-Priced Call Girls." The prosecutors claimed the store was violating the community standards of suburban Provo.
Spencer, who describes himself as a devout Mormon, challenged the prosecution's definition of the community's values by subpoenaing records that showed Utah County tolerated the consumption of porn in several outlets: Utah County cable subscribers had ordered at least 20,000 explicit movies in the past two years; the Sun Coast Video store in the town of Orem was deriving 20 percent of its rental sales from adult movies, even though adult movies only made up 2 percent of the store's inventory; Dirty Jo Punsters in nearby Spanish Fork was racking up on average $111,000 dollars per year selling sex toys, blow up dolls and other adult fare; the Provo Marriott across the street from the courthouse sold 3,448 adult pay-per-view movie rentals in 1998 alone.
"I was assigned to the case, and it was a real evolution for me," said Spencer in an interview last week. "The same religious values that I have are protected by the same Constitution that protects my neighbor's rights to do some things that I might not necessarily do."
Hmm, could it be that people were flying in from Granola-and-Volvo Land to experience the selection of porn in Utah County, and thereby driving down the standards of the community? Obviously nobody in that community would be buying anything. And certainly, if it weren't for the mom-on-pop video stores, there would be no porn industry at all to worry about.
It's almost impossible to get a handle on how much money corporate America is reaping by peddling smut. General Motors Corp. is not eager to brag about how many dirty movies it sold last year through a subsidiary.
In the Utah County trial, Spencer asked the jury why a lone, small business vendor like Peterman should be held to a higher standard than the likes of W. Mitt Romney. At the time Romney was on the board of Marriott International, which was making huge margins on piping porn into hotel rooms. Currently, Romney is the Republican governor of Massachusetts and his travels around the country have helped fuel speculation that he might run for president in 2008.
Yup, that's the bad news, folks. If you buy porn, you really are hurting America, if only because you're funding Republicans. You won't be able to get away from red states in Hell either, as they're buying just as much (or more) porn than the blues. So I'll leave you with one last quote:
In the end, the Rupert Murdochs of the world could not exist without the Utah Counties of the world. His political party needs their voters. His businesses need their patronage.
Happy Holidays, y'all.