Daily Kos

Democrats in Congress

Mon Jul 23, 2007 at 07:30:35 AM PDT

Any reasonable Congress-person who will hear it.

With all due respect.

A bunch of fucking little league baseball players playing in the Superbowl.  This is all you've got?  Censure??  You guys are NOT UP TO THE TASK.  We need to draft some real players.  One's that will put their padding on and play the fucking game instead of running out into the field waiting for the ball to come to them.  It's the wrong game you stupid assholes.

Update:  Yeah, it reads a little wacked out.  But I was very tired when I started, and very angry as I wrote this.  I never thought I would say this, but I feel like I'm losing faith in my Party.  For some reason I thought my party would be more direct.  Instead I feel like it's full of a bunch of wishy washy flippity floppity wet handshakers.  WTF.  I don't like the fact that I am beginning to understand the "Democrats are weak" meme, and it's taking root.
WTF happened to Ross Perot?

Hey Harry.  Any Doofus can go in the ring and get pumped up, in a good way or bad, for a couple of minutes in a fair matchup.  But real courage is required to step forward and begin to do exactly the right thing, the ideal thing, in spite of all odds, and the world telling you it can't happen, where the percieved consequences can alter everything for everyone.  

That is what the Continental Congress did.  That is what George Washington did.

Our Founding Fathers made exactly the right choices.  They did the ideal thing.  Their work was crafted precisely the way it needed to be.  And it was all done in times of greater trouble.  You guys are shoddy and sloppy.  I'm not sure you understand your purpose.  Have you not noticed, the public is not impressed with going for comprimises.  I don't think Madison, Jefferson, Adams, Washington, et. al. would be either.  I called each of them up.  You've got about a 20% approval rating.

They did not comprimise.

No one is really fighting for us now.  No.  No.  You're not.  You see, the ref is down, you're getting sucker punches, kidney punches, body blows.  And you still think it's a gentleman's fight.  But even the other corner is throwing salt at you, and the guy on the bell has been paid off.  Most of the audience doesn't know all this yet.  You're now on your back, and everything is a blur, and you don't quite know what to do.  That's not fighting.  And the advice from your corner is just to hold on until the end of the round.  Someone really needs to do something.

Most of the people in the audience are civil, by far.

I think I know what is stopping you.  Search your feelings.  You're scared.  You still can't believe it is happening to you, can you?  You just wanted to go to Congress and pass some nice legislation.  Why does is this happening to you?  Maybe if you close your eyes and wait it'll all go away.

I'm sick and fucking tired of being on the team of pussies.  Democrats really are the party of Mommy.  And Daddy has been beating the shit out of her, but she still loooooves her man.

And personally I'm tired of being nice.

[Bleep bleep bleep!!].  You took a goddamned oath to the Consti-[bleeping]-tution of this government.  Not to keeping your ideals of civilitity in government or your super-ambitious agenda to stop the war and create utopia.  YOUR FIRST FIELTY IS TO DEFEND THE CONSTITUTION, YOU ARROGANT BASTARDS.  DO YOUR FUCKING JOBS!!!  THE CONSTITTUION HAS VERY LITERALLY BEEN ATTACKED AND YOU'RE WORRIED THAT OUR PEOPLE CAN'T HANDLE THE THUNDER AND SMELL of the one weapon that the founding fathers, the once flesh and blood breathing authors of that oath you took, gave to the peoples house to protect it from an enemy from within?

What a bunch of fucking pussies!!

What the hell do you think our children will learn?  That Democrats, the Party of the Founders of our Government, didn't have the courage to uphold the constitition?  Are the members we have elected that insecure that they cannot take the rightful place in this current thread of history and lay down their political lives - while soldiers sacrifice their whole lives and citizens are forced to lay down their freedom - in the same demeanor of the earliest Party members to defend and affirm what is right LOUDLY SCREAMING IT FROM THE TOP OF THE CAPITAL DOME WITH JUSTICE!!???  That scream of justice should be recorded in history.  It should be recorded that you were willing to sacrifice everything for that document.  You swore an oath.

You swore an oath.

History will record you as weak.  You all say this is a time unlike any other, but you choose to stand back and do your "special positive thinking" "peace unto all" "they will learn from my example" methods to defend a document accustomed to being defended by blood, passionate slavery to ideals, not comprimises, and sacrifice in treasure and reputation for the championship of its ideal expression.  

George Bush and the Republicans are writing all the history now.  The action the Democrats took against him will be just a footnote in the history books.

What did that oath mean? The constitution is already damaged.  It's meaning has been confused, twisted, and therefor altered, alienated... until you set it right.

What we out here see is that you are all afraid of what you may lose, and what you can get out of it is confusing you for what you think you should want and do.

Define the transgressions with a cut from the sword given to you.  Not with a pen.

Your sacrifice is not sufficient.  What history may record about the near future after you've let the dust clear in your refusal to fight is that we may find others who actually go the last measure in everything they have other than life.  Fearlessly for the ideal cause.  Especially in the cause of those who do give that very last measure.

Congressional ratings so low may suggest there is no "you're safe" zone anymore.  There is a great deal of power behind impeachment.  Without even being a widely impregnated meme 50% of the people are there already.  How many more are pregnant and don't know it yet.  All you have to do is tap into it and it'll fuel your wildest dreams.  

"Crashing the gate."  Get it?  Not "someone buy my wares today" but "March of the Valkaries".  Don't be worried.  We've got your back.  And we're not exactly wielding just hoes and pitchforks here.  You're the one's who are scared.  Not us.

President Pelosi.  It sounds good to me.  I bet that is the real fear for her too.  Get a Therapist.  Or confindence coach.  You should have no problem in Cali finding an excellent one (try Santa Cruz).

Get your goddamn swords out and defend our Party's Honor.

Tags: Impeach, Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid (all tags) :: Previous Tag Versions

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  •  Washington Goes to Congress (2+ / 0-)

    Recommended by:
    Fabian, blueoasis

    WASHINGTON: I am Commander-in-Chief of the Contintental Army General George Washington, your Congressional Impeachment Instructor,
    and Founder and defender of this beloved country. From now on,
    you will speak only when spoken to, and the first and last words out of your filthy
    sewers will be "Sir!". Do you maggots understand that?

    CONGRESSIONAL DEMOCRATS [CDs]: (in unison) Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Bullshit! I can't hear you. Sound off like you got a pair.

    CDs: (louder) Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: If you ladies attend my convention in Chicago, if you survive CD training ... you will be a
    weapon, you will be a minister of justice, preying for impeachment. But until that day you are pukes!
    You're the lowest form of life on Earth. You are not even human fucking beings!
    You are nothing but unorganized grabasstic pieces of political shit! Because I am hard,
    you will not like me. But the more you hate me, the more you will learn. I am hard,
    but I am fair! First, there is no racial bigotry here in the Democratic Party! I do not look down on naggers, kikes,
    wops or greasers. Here you are all equally worthless! And my orders are to weed out
    all non-hackers who do not pack the gear to serve my beloved Constitution! Do you maggots
    understand that?

    CDs: (in unison) Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Bullshit! I can't hear you!

    CDs: (louder) Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: What's your name, scumbag?

    FEINGOLD: (shouting) Sir, Senator Feingold, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Bullshit! From now on you're Senator Cheesehead! Do you like that name?

    FEINGOLD: (shouting) Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Well, there's one thing that you won't like, Senator Cheesehead! They don't serve
    brats and beer on a daily basis in my mess hall!

    FEINGOLD: Sir, yes, sir!

    REID: (whispering) Is that you, John Wayne? Is this me?

    WASHINGTON: Who said that? Who the fuck said that? Who's the slimy little communist shit
    twinkle-toed cocksucker down here, who started a netroots candidate to campaign against him? Nobody, huh?!
    The fairy fucking godmother said it! Out-fucking- standing! I will Blog about you all until you
    fucking die! I'll Dairy about you until your assholes are sucking buttermilk.

    WASHINGTON: Was it you, you scroungy little fuck, huh?!

    PELOSI: Sir, no, sir!

    WASHINGTON: You little piece of shit! You look like a fucking worm! I'll bet it was you!

    PELOSI: Sir, no, sir!

    REID: Sir, I said it, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Well ...no shit. What have we got here, a fucking comedian? Senator Joker?
    I admire your honesty. Hell, I like you. You can come over to my house and fuck my sister.

    (Washington sucker punches Reid in the stomach)
    WASHINGTON: You little scumbag! I've got your name! I've got your ass! You will not laugh!
    You will not cry! You will learn by the numbers. The polls are with us.  The people want them out.  
    I will teach you. Now get up!
    Get on your feet! You had best unfuck yourself or I will unscrew your head and
    shit down your neck!

    JOKER Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Private Joker, why did you join my beloved Congress?

    JOKER Sir, to serve justice, sir!

    WASHINGTON: So you're for impeachment!

    JOKER Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Let me see your impeachment face!

    JOKER Sir?

    WASHINGTON: You've got an impeachment face? Aaaaaaaagh! That's an impeachment face. Now let me see your impeachment face!

    JOKER Aaaaaaaagh!

    WASHINGTON: Bullshit! You didn't convince me! Let me see your real impeachment face!

    JOKER Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!

    WASHINGTON: You didn't scare me! Work on it!

    JOKER Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: What's your excuse?

    PELOSI: Sir, excuse for what, sir?

    WASHINGTON: I'm asking the fucking questions here, Congresswoman.  Do you understand?!

    PELOSI: Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Well thank you very much! Can I be in charge for a while?

    PELOSI: Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Are you shook up? Are you nervous?

    PELOSI: Sir, I am, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Do I make you nervous?

    PELOSI: Sir!

    WASHINGTON: Sir, what? Were you about to call me an asshole?!

    PELOSI: Sir, no, sir!

    WASHINGTON: How tall are you, Private?

    PELOSI: Sir, five foot six, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Five foot six? I didn't know they stacked shit that high! You trying to squeeze an
    inch in on me somewhere, huh?

    PELOSI: Sir, no, sir.

    WASHINGTON: Bullshit! It looks to me like the best part of your legislation so far has been chewed up in the Senate Republicans
    and vetoed by the President! I think the American people have been cheated!

    WASHINGTON: Where in hell are you from anyway, Congresswoman?

    PELOSI: Sir, California, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Holy dogshit! California! Only fruits and hippies come from California, Congresswoman Cowboy!
    And you don't look much like a fruit to me, so that kinda narrows it down!
    Do you smoke dope?!

    PELOSI: Sir, no, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Are you a pot-puffer?

    PELOSI: Sir, no, sir!

    WASHINGTON: I'll bet you're the kind of gal that would suck on a bong, meditate for peace, or use magical negotiation skills
    to try to get the Republicans to play honestly while they don't even have the goddam common courtesy to come around to the
    Congress to explain all their lawbreaking or try to reach a conclusion to the war.  I'd be watching them!

    (Washington in the face of Leibermann)
    WASHINGTON: Did your parents have any children that lived?

    LEIBERMANN: Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: I'll bet they regret that! You're so ugly you could be a modern art masterpiece!
    What's your name, fatbody?

    LEIBERMANN: Sir, Joe Leibermann, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Leibermann? Leibermann, what, of Connecticut?

    LEIBERMANN: Sir, no, sir!

    WASHINGTON: You sound like a Republican! Are you a Republican?

    LEIBERMANN: Sir, no, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Do you suck dicks?

    LEIBERMANN: Sir, no, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Bullshit! I'll bet you could suck a golf ball through a garden hose!

    LEIBERMANN: Sir, no, sir!

    WASHINGTON: I don't like the way you talk Leibermann! Only idiots and Republicans talk like that!
    From now on you're Dino!

    LEIBERMANN: Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Do you think I'm cute, Dino? Do you think I'm funny?

    LEIBERMANN: Sir, no, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Then wipe that disgusting grin off your face!

    LEIBERMANN: Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Well, any fucking time, sweetheart!

    LEIBERMANN: Sir, I'm trying, sir.

    WASHINGTON: Dino, I'm gonna give you three seconds--excactly three fucking seconds--
    to wipe that stupid-looking grin off your face, or I will gouge out your eyeballs and
    skull-fuck you! One! Two! Three!

    LEIBERMANN: Sir, I can't help it, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Bullshit! Get on your knees, scumbag!

    (Washington holds his hand with a Vader grip in front of Leibermann)
    WASHINGTON: Now choke yourself!

    (Leibermann puts his hands around his throat and chokes himself)
    WASHINGTON: Goddamn it, with my hand, numbnuts!!

    WASHINGTON: Don't pull my fucking hand over there! I said choke yourself! Now lean forward
    and choke yourself!

    WASHINGTON: Are you through grinning?

    LEIBERMANN: (barely able to speak) Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Bullshit! I can't hear you!

    LEIBERMANN: (gasping) Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: Bullshit! I still can't hear you! Sound off like you got a pair!

    LEIBERMANN: (gagging) Sir, yes, sir!

    WASHINGTON: That's enough! Get on your feet!

    WASHINGTON: Dino, you had best square your ass away and start shitting me Tiffany cuff
    links ... or I will definitely fuck you up!

    LEIBERMANN: Sir, yes, sir!

    Obstruction of Justice: Most people are idiots... But don't tell them. It'll spoil all the fun for those of us who aren't.

    by d3n4l1 on Mon Jul 23, 2007 at 07:23:24 AM PDT

  •  No recommend and no tip for you (0+ / 0-)

    and just one comment.

    Amend this diary or delete it.

    You don't like the way they're doing their job? Fine, say so, but calling them "arrogant b*stards" and "f*cking p*ssies" is simply unacceptable.

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