Raven in Philly here to give a bit of a testimony on my experience of this quagmire of a campaign.
I've been a lurker here on DailyKos.com and formerly a registered Republican that, unfortunately, blindly voted for King George twice. After making that disgusting mistake, I was apathetic for the next four years while working on my bachelor's degree. Finally, 2008 rolled around and I became one of those 20-something voters that jumped ship to vote in the Democratic primary here in PA, not to sabotage, but because I wanted to be a part of something meaningful - something positive - and my views had changed dramatically. I voted for Barack Obama.
I hadn't been paying attention to much of the political talk around any of the candidates because I had become so disgusted with it in general. I grew up in a household that had Rush Limbaugh and Associates on talk radio 24/7 and when my parents finally decided to get cable, Fox News is now on the television at almost all times to the point where I think my Evangelical Presbyterian, God fearing parents are breaking the first commandment of "do not have any gods before me" - and I'm sure Bill O'RLY believes himself to be one. I had finally graduated high school, after voting for King George the first time, and escaped to college where my mother thought I would stop going to church and find a tattooed, motorcycle driving boyfriend. Well, I did stop going to church, but unfortunately didn't find that boyfriend.
I couldn't say why I voted for Bush the second time around. There wasn't any excuse for it (and I still feel like I'm going to get hanged when I admit this to people). I was back home because I transferred to Drexel University and it was cheaper to live at home. I remember not being impressed with Kerry and the "Anybody but Bush" mantra irritated me. While I still think that kind of mantra is still stupid, I have a far better idea of what the people were thinking and feeling when they said it.
It wasn't until 2008 and the whole Reverend Wright argument came up that my interest was peeked. I moderate on a forum and a bunch of the members were discussing the different things going on the campaigns and a few of them were adamantly angry about the Reverend and that Obama was a racist. Mind boggled, I started looking into it and thank God for the internet because here I could find actual quotes and YouTube footage that didn't involve the Fox News splicing and dicing technique. I got quickly angry at the people spewing the same spoon-fed mantra by the mainstream news media, especially Fox (which now makes me physically ill to listen to at all). Even though I'm a white female and will never understand personally what it's like to be a black person in America, I didn't find anything that the Reverend said as overly offensive or even surprising. Then again, I am a Philadelphian.
By 2008, I wasn't the same girl that pulled the Republican lever in 2000 and in 2004, so to speak, at the voting booth. I had stopped going to church (which was a struggle with my parents) and even stopped worrying about whether or not there was a God or an afterlife. This isn't to say I've become an atheist or completely anti-religion. I've found that it just doesn't bother me either way. By 2008, I had graduated from Drexel University with a Bachelor's Degree in Criminal Justice with honors and nearly a 4.0 overall grade point average. I work in the Juvenile Justice System* in Philadelphia now. These things, I think, have greatly changed my worldview through education and experience.
The more and more I looked into these different arguments against Barack Obama, the more and more I wanted to vote for him. "Experience," "Elitism," "OMG NO FLAG PIN," Reverend Wright, "Don't fall for his eloquence" (what does it say about our country when we get excited over a man can enunciate and pronounce the English language correctly?)... all of these things became what looked like to me as completely specious arguments and it made me angry. The hypocrisy of it all infuriated me. The baleful "liberal media bias" excuse that my parents constantly toss around (and totally believe whole-heartedly that Fox News is "fair and balanced") made me see red. The ridiculousness of all of it, while there were real issues to talk about like our over 4,000 dead soldiers, the Iraq mess, torture, the economy and our dollar, gas prices (never thought I'd say "Thank God for SEPTA") made me so angry and frustrated in a way that motivated me to change my registration to read "Democrat," so I could vote for Obama. With the past "debate" between Obama and Clinton and the crap shoot that it was.... I couldn't wait to vote for Obama in hopes that PA could maybe, just maybe, help put an end to the whole thing, so all our efforts could be focused on defeating the Republicans in November. Well, I tried, at least.
Granted, I think this duking out between both Democratic candidates is great in the sense that it has inspired so many people to vote (though, sadly, I still have some friends that are entirely pessimistic about the whole thing). For once, it seemed like my vote might actually matter and though I can tell myself that my vote ALWAYS matters, this time around it seemed like it might have a direct effect that I can see. Well, even though my man didn't win PA, I was glad to see Philly went for him when I thought it would be Clinton with Mayor Nutter (that name still makes me chuckle) and Rendell supporting her. I was also glad to see she didn't get the landslide that she wanted. However, I was really hoping he could come out on top to nip this whole thing in the bud.
Despite my anger over all the pettiness that has been going on, what spoke to me the most was the slogan on Obama's website:
"I'm asking you to believe. Not just in my ability to bring about real change in Washington... I'm asking you to believe in yours."
As someone who fell into the trap of apathy, this spoke to me and it wouldn't have mattered who really said it because I still would have looked at the issues and what has been unfolding and made a decision for myself (instead of just following the party line). The point of that quote is to inspire us to do what we can do make the change we want to see.
It's kind of funny how people talk about their work ethic, that nothing is for free - you have to work for it - then stay home on Election Day because their "vote doesn't matter." I can understand that feeling of despair as a citizen in a free country, but at the same time I think we need to remember that just as we have to work hard in our lives to get that job, to have that family, we need to work hard to move forward as a country. Sitting on our couches isn't going to make anything change.
So, I tried and it has made all the difference to me.
((*Leaving intentionally vague for job security.))