WASHINGTON (MAy 18) -- Following calls for "a repackaging of its damaged brand name," the Republican National Committee recommended on Friday that the party be renamed "Purple Haze," a suggestion that was immediately vetoed by several elderly white men in suits.
"We realize the importance in today's world of being 'with it,' and 'hep,' said former House Speaker Newt Gingrich, "but we do not have to become 'hippies' just to get votes."
Republican Presidential candidate John McCain agreed.
"We can't just tie-dye our shirts and pretend to be Timothy Leary," he said. "Today's young people see right through things like that."
Mr. McCain is said to be considering a cameo appearance on Mod Squad.