The title sounds like this would be from a long-time Obama supporter, n'est-ce pas? Well, it's not; one look at my diary history will tell you that much. I'm finding, somewhat to my surprise, that I got over the disappointment of Clinton's loss a while ago, because it's really been a foregone conclusion for a while (anytime Slate.com has a Deathwatch for you, you might as well pack it in, I guess [although I'm glad the life preserver buoyed her up some at the end! 8^) ]).
I do have a serious question for all y'all out there, and I'm sorry if this has been asked before, but I ask it from the bottom of my heart.
As a Clinton supporter and life-long Democrat, I find myself not able to shift gears, even though, like I said, I knew it was over a while back (like, um, Iowa). For me, it's not even so much that I was an ardent Clinton fan (I have/had plenty of problems with her, though I love her for what she's done in the past), but more that I just didn't (and still don't, if I'm being honest) believe in Obama as president.
The reasons I've had are many and complicated and aren't worth going into (if you really want that for context, read my last diary), but those reasons aren't just going to flitter away when Barack and Hillary raise their arms together this Saturday. Right now, I still wouldn't feel right voting for him. When I hear him talk, I still think of Elmer Gantry. When I hear friends of mine praise him, I still think of Chance the Gardener. Would I vote for McCain? A thousand times no. But there is a part of me that fears that I'll never be able to get behind this candidate, even if I can recognize his talents.
But I'm not gonna give up on a Democrat, and I do want to get on board the Hopemobile, even if it's just enough to not have to metaphorically hold my nose in the voting booth. To borrow a computer term, I want to reboot. I want to try to re-introduce myself to Sen. Obama (and not wait until August when the convention will certainly try to do that for me).
My question to you all is this: How would you recommend doing that? What should I read, what should I watch, what should I understand in order to start from square one with him?
Someone on TPM recommended to me several weeks ago that I read his first book, "Dreams of My Father." I still may yet do that, though the English major in me balks at the idea of the lost father cliché. I'd like to hear if people agree that this is a good place to start and why.
I'm probably going to sit down in the next few days with my wife (a more ardent Clinton supporter than me) and watch his 2004 convention speech (I remember seeing it the first time around and thinking he was a wunderkind, but still a "-kind"). Are there any other speeches that you feel are good places to start?
I'm NOT asking for someone to write a manifesto in the comments on why Obama is great, but if there are diaries from the past (non-patronizing diaries, please!) that really spoke to you to sum up what you see as the measure of the man, please suggest that.
And finally, I ask for your patience. I completely respect that you have good reasons to support your candidate, because I respect all of us on here as good progressives and Democrats, and I only ask that you respect that I, also a good progressive and Democrat, have my legitimate reasons to still be skeptical.
That said, I hope you can help me out! Perhaps, in doing so, it will help foster that unity we all are hoping for.
Quick Update: I removed a couple of things that I think, in looking over it again, use a bit of weighted language... enough of that crap from me.