For some reason, Barack Obama and the liberal media are giving John McCain a hard time just because he forgot how many houses he owns.
John McCain strongly objects to this. Below is his strongly worded letter fighting back against those who dare malign his inability to remember the number of houses he owns.
Dear Liberal Media:
I am always forgetting how many houses, cars, planes, oil wells, small islands, and toasters I own. Who can possibly keep count?
Think about it. Imagine you're in of your houses. You have other houses but you're not inside of them at the moment. So you forget you have them. Makes sense, right?
It's kinda like forgetting that Iran and Al Qaeda are mortal enemies. I mean, they're both Muslim, right. And all 1.2 billion Muslims on earth exactly alike and all of them support Al Qaeda and Iran at the exact same time. That's why we have a clash of civilizations -- because all Muslims are Iranians who support Al Qaeda. Oh wait. Except for the Saudis. They give us oil. So they're not really Muslims or Iranians or part of Al Qaeda. See how hard this stuff is to remember?
And then there's off-shore drilling. Sometimes I remember that I used to be against. Then I remember that I am for it. Then I forget if I am for it or against it. Basically, I just find out what Obama's saying and just go with the opposite. At least, I think that's what I do. But who can remember these things?
The hardest thing to remember though is why I am running for president. If someone could remind me, that would be awesome!
Yours truly,
John S. McCain