NEW POLL JUST RELEASED!!!
A whole SHIT-TON of people are voting for Barack Obama! Black people, old people, white people - including SUPER-PASTY white people - angry people, happy people - an entire gigantic F**KLOAD of them are voting for Obama!
Contrary to a recent article that states some TOTALLY OBVIOUS shit, I'm here to convey to you some other TOTALLY OBVIOUS news: people are fed up with Republicans and would rather vote for a 12 year old spelling bee champ than pull the lever for four more years of this crap.
And, in case you haven't heard, white folks are even putting down their basketballs long enough to vote for Obama in...INDIANA.
Indeed, entire legions of pigment-deficient voters are casting their votes for Obama in...MONTANA.
In Iowa, where 106% of residents are white, Obama is absolutely crushing McCain.
Even South Carolina, home to racial harmony and understanding, shows Obama surging to within striking distance of McCain.
And if that wasn't enough, scores of overalls-wearing white voters (like myself) are having a dueling banjo contest in West Virginia to see who loves Obama more.
Personally, I've never in my life seen so many damn white folk excited to vote for a black man. Hell, not even Will Smith would be getting this many votes, and let's be honest, Will Smith is one lovable dude (though that Scientology stuff is kind of weird). The only guy who give Obama a run for his money is Wayne Brady, but I heard he's a libertarian (Paul/Brady '12?).
So here's my press release:
POLL: ENTIRE CRAPLOADS OF WHITE FOLK ARE VOTING FOR THE BLACK DUDE - CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT SHIT?
The economy is in the tank. Obama has the brilliance, temperament, and vision to prove to the country that he's not only capable of being President but that he's going to be a damn fine one, at that. So ignore this shit, stop the hand-wringing about race and the Bradley effect and all that nonsense, and get to work trying to convince these people that Obama is the best man for job.
UPDATE: First time on the rec list. Thanks, everyone. Just trying to have a laugh. And, more importantly, just so everyone "gets it" - the story here isn't that some white Dems may not vote for Obama. No, the story in this election is the overwhelming majority of Americans, black and white and every other hue, who have taken a liking to Obama, who trust him, who like his ideas and his vision for this country, and are planning on voting for him in unprecedented numbers. THAT is the story of this election, and it's one we should all keep in mind as we canvass, phone-bank, and talk to our friends and neighbors.
And to people who don't like my curse words: SYFPH!!