Could Sarah Palin have been hiding a repressed libido? The many faces and transformations of Sarah Palin since joining the McCain presidential ticket are shockingly telling. Those changing faces have fascinated me so much (and perhaps you too?) that I have decided to conduct a small and very brief psychoanalysis of Sarah Palin’s awakening libidinal impulses in the context of her $150,000 clothing spree.
Let me begin with what I called “the incredible arousal of Sarah Palin” in the title of this article. And I want to be as purposefully ambiguous and cowardly as possible, hence my decision to hide my duplicity and duplicitous thoughts behind the many meanings of the word “arousal,” which, indeed, can mean “stimulation,” “awakening,” “excitement”, among many other meanings and insinuations which I prefer not to list here.
Which, then, allows me to say this: I am no sex doctor, but I know how to recognize an arousal when I see one. Remember the Sarah Palin of old? The one who used to dress and look like a depressed Alaskan moose? Well, it looks as though, deep down in her cold and reclusive Wasilla somewhere in Alaska, Sarah Palin may have been hiding a repressed libido which, for some strange reason, only John McCain, of all people, was able to tap into, and … unleash. That guy has an instinct for women, I tell ya. Obama is no match for John McCain’s nose for the hot and… dirty. Look at how slimy and smeary, and juicy, the McCain campaign got once Sarah Palin got into it. John is the Mac, my friends, John is the Mac. Thanks to Sarah, the Mac got his groove back big time.
In an article on WWD.com yesterday, Irin Carmon reported that Tom Broecker, the costume designer of “Saturday Night Live” (SNL) had a very hard time convincing Sarah Palin that, to fit well with the Palin character that SNL had developed, the real Palin needed to wear the same clothes as Tina Fey, the fake Palin. Carmon quotes Broecker as saying:
In speaking with her, I had to get her to understand why she needed to wear the same thing as Tina [Fey]. We had gone off and created it for the first time a month ago, a look we identified as Sarah Palin. She had moved on in her own image of herself. I said, 'I know you've moved on you're wearing tighter clothes, more black but this is the character of Sarah Palin.
Carmon concludes:
The compromise, he [Broecker] said, was Palin returning in her own clothes the second time she appeared on the show to cheer on Amy Poehler's Palin-themed rap.
And of course, you betcha, she did.
So, it seems that, in a matter of weeks (less than two months) since being “tapped” for VP, Sarah Palin has grown greedy by the day and, perhaps, a bit insatiable. The SNL clothes were, suddenly, way below Sarah Palin’s pay grade, as she sought to fully own her newly acquired sex-symbol image. Gone is the moosy Sarah Palin who used to pride herself on being a simple hockey mama from Wasilla. Gone is the Joe-Six-Pack lady who used to claim to be a woman of the people. It is in the league of the Paris Hiltons and Britney Spears of the world that Sarah Palin wants to play now, and she is darn good, perhaps too darn good, at it.
Which begs the notice: John McCain seems to have really unleashed a monster here, my friends.
And it seems his bet paid off big time since, each time Sarah Palin has generously offered herself to us, we turned on, and tuned into, our TV sets by the millions, and, by golly, broke the audience record every single time. Sarah Palin’s VP debate broke audience records, and so did her appearance on SNL. We tuned into the show to see SNL mock the hot lady, not because we hated her, but because we loved her and we loved it, even when we despised her. It was a beautifully painful sight, as well as a painfully beautiful thing. Sarah got big ratings for her appearance on SNL, and that was indeed the whole purpose of Sarah going there in the first place: she wanted them big.
Now, it is well known, or at least stereotypically so, that expensive clothes and shoes are to a woman what a good porn movie is to a man. It looks as though, after getting used to the high life that comes with the $150,000 clothing budget that McCain had reserved for her, and experiencing the sensual feel that only expensive clothes are able to give her as they softly rub against her skin, Sarah Palin got hooked. It simply became harder and harder for her to come back to the earth of normal people and regular Joes and Jones. Because wearing $150,000 clothes can become as addictive as drugs or sex, one can only sympathize with Sarah Palin. Poor thing. How could she possibly have been able to compete with Cindy McCain on those stages, looking all moosy with her old Alaska clothes, huh? So, John McCain is right: Sarah needed clothes. The Mac could certainly not afford her looking too moosy out there. That would not be right. In fact, that ain’t right.
And so here we are with the new Sarah Palin. Having lived in Wasilla most of her young and adult life, and having repressed for too long her longing for great things and great happenings, Sarah Palin’s genie is now, thanks to John McCain, out of the bottle, and there is no going back. Sarah has become aroused in a very sexual, and sensual, way and there is no going back to the dullness of Wasilla with its moose-looking clothes.
The kick Sarah Palin gets out of her $150,000 clothes is probably as arousing to her as jet-skiing is to Todd Palin. Todd will no longer be, never ever again, and forever, ever, ever, the only one having fun in Wasilla. No longer will he be the only one to enjoy the fame that came with his snowmobile rides and world-championship gigs out there in Alaska. Sarah has discovered herself, and there is nothing Todd will be able to do about it now… Sarah now got game, baby.
For those who have any doubts as to Sarah Palin’s repressed libido and the incredible, almost steroidal pleasures that the presidential campaign of John McCain has afforded her, especially with those $150,000 clothes, it suffices to look at the way Sarah Palin talks and the type of sexually-charged vocabulary she uses on the campaign trail.
Sarah does not just want to go to Washington to change things, she wants to go to Washington to “shake things up.” I, for one, have been wondering what exactly Sarah has been alluding to…
Sarah not only salutes the fact that the government had to “step in there” to bail AIG out of its sinkhole, she also lauds her mavericky association with John McCain as one in which the independent pair is bent on “coming in there” to stop the cronyism of the corrupt <span style="text-decoration: line-through;">hole</span> ole’ boy system that Washington has become.
Sarah is not just going to Washington to shake’em up (whatever that means), she is relishing her future role as Vice President of the United States, a job which she described in a KUSA interview as a great job because the Vice President, who is in charge of the US Senate (so she said), “can really get in there with the senators.”
With all this very virile rhetoric from the moose-hunting lady from Alaska, all that is left to do, really, is for her and John McCain to “slam it in there” and, possibly, pull Osama bin Laden from the caves of Afghanistan, should they get elected, or not. After all, John McCain already knows how to get Osama bin Laden. He won’t just tell us.
No wonder, then, that the only issue that has really had some sort of traction for John McCain and Sarah Palin has been their proposal to drill all over America. For the pair, drilling is the do-it-all, fit-it-all remedy to America’s economic woes. To save themselves, Americans must drill, and drill now. And so Sarah took this message to heart and, looking us in the eyes, began chanting, quite invitingly, “drill, baby, drill.”
This message was so powerful that some blogger, somewhere on the Web, thought Sarah was really taking to him personally via the TV screen. Sarah can also be very messianic, just like Obama, but in a much more powerful way. The “drill, baby, drill” message is simple enough for all to hold on to.
And throngs of Americans at her rallies, beguiled by such an appeal, became aroused to the message. Encouraged by their response, Sarah realized she was really on to something. So, she kept hammering: “Drill, baby, drill.” And as she threw her hands in the air during her SNL appearance last Saturday, I could almost hear Sarah Palin whispering: “get in there and drill, baby, drill; drill like you just don’t care, and throw you hands in the Ayers….”
Are you aroused, yet?
I am.
The “drill, baby, drill” motto is so important to Sarah Palin that, when Joe Biden, during their one and only debate in St. Louis, Missouri, made the mistake of dulling her message with his lame “drill, drill, drill” rendition of it, Sarah promptly corrected him by saying, “the chant is ‘drill, baby, drill’.” This correction came after she tried to preemptively mollify the old man’s expected surge with her very suggestive “Hey, can I call you Joe?” line at the beginning of the debate. Or did she actually mean “Joey,” as in “Joey the Plummer,” or “you my little bad boy Joey with the reputation of getting in there and saying too many things all at once, as in verbal ejac…”, or as in “lookey Joey, see what you missing?”
And Joey Biden, unfortunately (or fortunately?), backed off, intimidated by the fear of appearing too manly, too eager to get in there and slam her with all those lines and parries and assault strategies that his campaign gave him. Yet, Palin looked so inviting, so eager, and so ready for any assault Biden could have slammed her with. She may have felt a bit disappointed by Joey's performance, that's for sure. She may have even felt a bit insulted that he failed so blatantly to pound her, just because she is a woman. That is sexism, simply and bluntly.
<span style="line-height: 38px;">But I digress, I think.</span>
Or do I? Not really. If you look carefully at the headlines nowadays, it is all sexual. Looks to me like all the bloggers and journalists have jumped on the Palin bandwagon. Nowadays, Obama does not just criticize Palin’s misleading rhetoric, he slams her. Obama or McCain no longer simply go up in the polls, they surge. I may have even seen an ABC News headline back in July that spoke of McCain rising. Why? Had he not risen recently?That sounds a bit disingenuous, especially when I consider the fact that I recently read an article in which McCain was hammering Obama.
I am not even going to mention The Miami Herald's infamous blog called "Naked Politics," a blog which makes it a central objective of its existence to tell the "raw truth about power and ambition in Florida." (I wish it said "Alaska" here). Not to be outdone, they recently wrote of Palin pounding Obama.
Now, I don't know about you, but all this sounds rather debased, and arousing, to me. Politics as we knew it is no more, my friends…
And all this, I say, is Sarah Palin and John McCain's fault. They should have known better.
So, what did I take from this whole drilling thing? Simply that Biden’s “drill, drill, drill” version was probably not as romantic and sensual as Palin’s “drill, baby, drill” call. The word “baby” has been a very powerful word in our society since the years of Rock and Roll, and it was not right for Biden to even think of subverting it. Palin would not allow it, and neither would the millions of Americans who have proclaimed their allegiance to the only celebrity in America who has publically proclaimed drilling to be a national duty.
Thankfully, I was not the only one to see something sexual in that drilling exchange. The Economist saw some sort of a gender-card being played in that exchange too. Here is what The Economist wrote:
“The chant is 'drill, baby, drill',” she corrected, playing some kind of gender card against herself.
Against herself? Maybe not. That woman knows what she wants, and I betcha Bill Clinton would not, in his wildest dream, even consider waiving his finger at her through the television screen to disown her with his legendary “I did not…. with that woman.” Sarah Palin is the type of woman one must own, even if that means being impeached forever from public office. So, I imagine Clinton would have proudly looked Americans right in the eyes and said, I am sorry folks, but I really must acknowledge all my sins exactly as you have heard them, whether true or not: “Yes, I did… with that woman. Guilty as charged. Now take me to jail where I will happily serve my sentence, whatever you want it to be.”
So you see, my friends, I did not invent this whole thing about Sarah Palin’s incredible arousal. And I am sure John McCain knew what he was doing when he chose her and transformed her into a sex symbol rather than a Vice Presidential candidate. The cost of her $150,000 makeover is such that the intent is very clear: Sarah Palin was brought in to turn on the men, and perhaps John McCain himself. It helps to be pallin’ around with a drilling… (ooops, there I go again), I mean, a running mate who is sexy. Even John McCain knows how to recognize a hot VP when he sees one. He also knows how to acknowledge that his own wife kinda looks scarily coldish, and perhaps… a bit frozen, when standing on the same stage as his mavericky partner. So, it helps to get in there and warm things up a little bit.
As for Todd Palin, I can only conclude by saying: Beware, Toddy. Sarah is a goner, my friend, mark my words. Come November 5, after you guys have lost of course, Sarah will once and for all be well above your pay grade. Soon, when you finally go home to resume your pallin’ around with your old boys of the Alaskan Independence Party, I bet you will be bemoaning having let the pit-bull with the lipstick out, and there is nothing you will be able to do about it. You will have only yourself to blame, and perhaps John McCain too… my friend...
Brought to you, and authorized by, The Barack Obama Unofficial Advisory Council (ourselves)
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Dr. Daniel Mengara
The author is the founder of the Barack Obama Unofficial Advisory Council. He is an Associate Professor of French and Francophone Studies at Montclair State University (New Jersey). He is also the leader of Bongo Doit Partir (Bongo Must Go), a movement of expatriated Gabonese citizens opposed and seeking an end to the 41-year-old dictatorial regime of Omar Bongo in Gabon.