After Dick Cheney backed out of a Jean Schmidt appearance at the end of the 2006 campaign, speculation has been rampant about which Republican would ever again agree to appear alongside the embattled congress-entity from, I'm sorry to say, my district, OH-02.
Ted Stevens, maybe? Larry Craig? Ann Coulter for a Halloween Wicked Witch-a-thon?
Neither John McCain nor Sarah Palin allowed Schmidt to appear along with them at any of their numerous stops in southwest Ohio this year. The contest prize of a genuine (rhymes with pine) Jean Schmidt red-white-and-blue campaign emery board for the first non-photoshopped photo of Schmidt and Palin together has so far gone unclaimed.
But now, not one but TWO Republican schmucks have agreed to appear at a Schmidt event tonight, at an "Old-Fashioned Campaign Rally and Bonfire." (Shall we assume that the Schmidt idea of an old-fashioned bonfire is burning books? Or Democrats in effigy?)
Anyway, to end the suspense, the two Schmidt-schmucks are......
JOE THE PLUMBER! and Cincinnati wingnut shlock-jock BILL CUNNINGHAM!
I kid you not, this is not snark. And let's refrain from any jokes about the Schmidt clogging your pipes. Or not.
If you're so inclined, Schmidt and the schmendricks will appear as an ensemble tonight, Nov. 1, 7:00 to 9:00 PM, at the Hoffman Family Farm, 836 Loveland-Miamiville Road, Miami Township, Ohio.
Bring books to burn, or marshmallows, if you insist. I may be coaxed into parting with that emery board for a really good photo of Mean Jean, Joe, and Cunningham in a menage-a-trois pose.