There are two women in my life that have been the driving and positive influence for me; my mother and my paternal grandmother. My mother passed away in May, 2007 and I miss her every minute of every day. My mother lived in the next neighborhood over from me and I talked to her everyday. Every Sunday was an unofficial "family day" and her and I would drive to my brother's, so Nana could spoil her granddaughter rotten.
I thought getting through this past year of holidays without her was the most difficult thing we could go through. She was my best friend and, no offense to any other moms out there, the greatest mom in the world. Last week, I found myself weeping (again) that my mom wasn't here for this historic election. My mom was a lifelong liberal and spent years as a volunteer for local politicians, as a member of a Democratic group, a Union shop steward. My mom believed in voting and the importance of participation.
My mom took me to a Women's Lib march when I was 4 and I learned to sing (at the top of my lungs and in public) "I am Woman, Hear Me Roar" Ah, 1972! She let me participate in any protest or march when I was old enough to decide for myself and we marched yearly together at the "Women Take Back the Night" rallies.
When I was in high school, she gave permission for me to go to a Pro Choice Rally in Los Angeles (a 7 hour bus ride each way). My friend and I were the youngest people there, who were not brought by a parent. We both got involved in "Aids Walk" and marched for Peace in San Francisco during the Gulf War. My mom didn't just talk the talk, she walked the walk
My mom would have LOVED to vote in the primaries. In my heart, I think she would have started out supporting Senator Clinton, but once the primaries were over, she'd be in love with Senator Obama. I KNOW she would have been inspired by him, like I'm inspired by him. I've really been teary-eyed that she's not here. But she's in my heart and she's inspired me over a lifetime to vote, to participate, to work for the future (and for change).
My grams is an amazing woman. We just celebrated her 91st birthday two weeks ago. She's still living independently, mentally sharp and physically active. Things might not work as well as the did in her 20's, but she's a hell of a beautiful, strong, smart woman.
She was married at 18 and went on to have 4 sons. I was the first granddaughter and she used to tell me that she had to get 110% to prove that she was just as capable as her husband and her sons. If one of the boys got one wrong on their driving test, she would get NONE wrong.
She told me the other day that grandpa was a Republican and he used to tease her that they canceled each other out, but the both always voted (he's another amazing influence, gone much too soon from my life). Grams taught me to stand up for, and to believe in myself.
Of the many things Grams has done for me, the reason I had to include her in this diary is because of two very interesting stories about her. The first is just darling to me - my grams used to have the biggest crush on Cab Calloway and I can see why.
The second is that she told me that back in the 1930's, grandpa hired a farm hand to help out; a black man. And everyday at lunchtime, grams would call the hired hand and grandpa in for lunch. One day, the hired man's girlfriend came over and my grams invited her to join them for lunch. The girlfriend was too afraid to come in and sit at the same table with my grandparents. My grandparents didn't understand that fear, because they didn't think of the color of their worker's skin, but treated him with respect as a hard working man. Grams always told me that making people afraid was foolish and people were people no matter the race, etc. It made her sad to remember that black people had a reason to be afraid. She told me this story one day after my father, had made a casual, stupid, racist remark. She told me the story and said she didn't know how one of her kids could have learned prejudice. And she's right; proving that prejudice is taught!
Grams will be voting for Senator Barack Obama and NO on Prop. 8. She was sad that Senator Clinton didn't win. There's a part of me that aches over that; there's not much chance a female president will happen in her lifetime. But she's proud to support Senator Obama and helping us change the future to something more positive.
So thank you Mom and Grams and every other person who's been a positive influence in my life. And a huge thank you to all the volunteers of campaigns and those who donated.
I love you, mom!
P.S. I just saw the news about Toot. It's thanks to great women and men like her and my mom that we have so much to be proud of. My deepest condolences to Senator Obama and his family.