On the eve of an election so monumental, I want to take a moment to discuss the concept of "Black Angst." Jonathan Capehart, in today's Washington Post, writes about the nagging fear and anxiety that is plaguing so many of us as African Americans tonight.
Let me begin by saying that I didn't BELIEVE. I received a phone call from a friend in early January 2006 who told me that Barack would be running for President. We had both known Barack and Michelle for several years at that point and were honestly stunned at the decision. We were both incredulous. My former boss signed on to raise money for the campaign, family members became field directors for the campaign, and still other friends joined the ranks of staffers. I decided to contribute as a volunteer given the other responsibilities in my life. I threw myself wholeheartedly into canvassing in Iowa, then Indiana, and finally Wisconsin. I made thousands of calls. I jumped in to coordinate other volunteers. It was almost like sense memory for me. I am an activist and organizer, always have been. This was the easy part.
Still I couldn't really fathom that I would be here tonight. I have spent three straight days making calls to Ohio, PA, and Indiana. I have made over 1300 calls in three days. I haven't been able to stop. I have been possessed. I call and I surf the web at the same time. That's been my existence for three straight days.
I am not new to politics. I have been active locally and nationally for years. However, I must admit that this moment was IMPROBABLE for me. It still is. I still cannot let myself believe that the United States of America may elect a Black man named Barack Hussein Obama as its President -- as the "face" of this country. It is too CRAZY. I will come back to this point in a minute.
Anyway, Capehart confesses in the Washington Post today that he is anxious. I can relate. Yet it is not really nervousness for me about the future of this country which is of course important to me. It is something else. He writes:
Democrats are nervous. I mean real nervous. And it's not hard to understand why. They watched the White House go to George W. Bush in 2000 in the most contested election in modern U.S. history. They watched him hang on to the Oval Office in 2004. And they are wigged out that somehow, in some way, Obama will get tripped up on the road to victory.
But with African Americans, myself included, the anxiety runs so deep as to be almost innate. I couldn't put my finger on it until a conversation with my friend Erana over pancakes and eggs in New York on Saturday. We dubbed it "black angst."
Many of us as Black people living in this country are familiar with the feeling of "doing everything right" and still getting passed over for a promotion or a partnership or a scholarship, etc... Capehart illustrates his fear about Barack's candidacy by defining "Black Angst."
Yes, Obama went to the coveted school (Harvard). He got a plum job (U.S. senator). And he got the house in the choice neighborhood (Hyde Park, Chicago). All thanks to the sacrifices of heroes known and unknown who helped the nation stay true to its ideals. He has also run a nimble and near-flawless campaign. He's ahead in every national poll and statistically tied with or ahead of John McCain in states that President Bush carried in 2004. And he's raised more money than any presidential candidate ever, which has made it possible for him to be competitve in those red states. Yet I still can't allow myself to think for one minute that "they" (the infamous, faceless "they") will let Obama, Michelle and the girls move easily into 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue come January.
You can read Capehart's full essay here:
http://voices.washingtonpost.com/...
There you go... So many of us as Blacks in this country live in constant fear that "they" will not let us advance but so far. For some of us, that concern becomes debilitating and paralyzing. For many more of us, it provides us with the fuel to become "strivers" and to fight against great odds to succeed in a culture that most of us aren't certain ever really wanted us to survive. So there we go! Black Angst is alive and well in election 2008.
I don't know how it will all turn out tomorrow. I do know that I have HOPE but more importantly I have a work ethic and drive that will push me to GOTV like never before. It's TIME for ACTION. This is MY TIME! This is MY ancestors' TIME! I stand on the shoulders of giants and I owe them my very existence.
Lately, I have been going back to a favorite Youtube clip which comes from a church service that Barack Obama attended in 2007. In this clip, Rev. Lowery (a national treasure and American HERO) speaks about the "good crazy people." I love this clip because I agree with him that it is the "good crazy people" who have gotten Barack this far. I want to thank all of the "good crazy people" for your hours of dedication to this campaign. I want you to know that I feel overwhelmed with emotion when I think about the fact that you have joined this improbable journey.
A toast to the GOOD CRAZY PEOPLE -- it's been a blast! May we leave everything on the floor tomorrow.