It seems like now, more than ever, we should take a brief moment to reflect. We are mere hours from a monumental decision. It sounds odd, but that observation just sank in tonight for me. For months, nay, years, I've been eagerly following the political situation. The news, the candidates, the primaries - all of it has been whittled down to this. Now's as good a time as any to realize how we got here.
Here's mine:
Personally, I can recall shouting at the television the day of inauguration in 2001. I was younger then, absorbed in my naïveté. I wasn't remarkably interested in politics at the time, but I guess that comes with still being in middle school (maybe naïveté is an understatement). Still, there was some portion of my mind dead set against this.
It was the last day of eighth grade. My friend and I were actively arguing with a teacher of ours. It became clear in retrospect that he was clearly a dye-in-the-wool Reagan Republican. Years later, he would decry French products - yes, one of those people. Nevertheless, I valued his opinion then and if I were to talk to him now, I'm sure I would feel just the same. So, there we were, railing on him that Bush would be the worst President ever. And, honestly, who are we to know? Our minds were only just blossoming, who would value our opinion over his? He was adamant that one day, we would come back and tell him "Oh, Mr. M______, we were so wrong! He wasn't as bad as we said he would be. Matter of fact, he wasn't half bad." I wish that he had been right.
Later that year, I was sitting in a Global Studies class. My teacher, coolly, told us that there was some news going on. He turned the TV to CNN and the blackened hole of the North Tower of WTC. It didn't quite strike me then. It seemed tragic, but in all likelihood an accident. Then, there was word of the South Tower being hit. I went to Biology and was frustrated that he wouldn't turn it on so that we could see what was transpiring. I heard, as it snaked it's way through the high school population, that the towers had fell. Later that day, I sat in my Journalism class. I was naïve then, too. Being a high school student, I was more concerned about being released to go home than the events themselves. I wasn't aware of the depth of the event until I got home. My aunt was sitting in front of the TV crying. She asked me, "How could this happen?" For nearly the rest of the year, Journalism class was spent watching C-SPAN and reading newspaper articles. We had been attacked.
About two years later, I watched the WMD story be raveled. Saddam Hussein has assembled weapons capable of hitting America. I don't recall ever buying the story. Not even briefly. It seemed absurd on its face, but, again, that could be the naïveté. How could those weapons hit America? The country did not seem sophisticated enough to have technology capable of long range strikes. Although there were whispers of biological and chemical weapons, it smelled off. I distinctly remember Hans Blix entering the country and informing the world of his findings. Much later, we would find out how few WMDs were there. This time, I was glad that I was right, but only in that there was no threat. The war, well, was another matter entirely.
My senior year of high school, I was becoming more interested in politics. I didn't know much about Dean at the time and I was a member of the anyone but Bush crowd. I was so throughly disinterested in seeing him president again that anyone would be a more favorable candidate. A friend of mine asked me, when aware of my support of Kerry (once the primary had settled), whether I actually liked him. I didn't really have a response, to be honest. I didn't know much about his policies, but I did participate in a debate between the Young Republicans and Young Democrats. I went to my first political rally for Kerry and, considering my hometown's political slants, it was remarkable how many people we had show up to see him speak. This, of course, made it devastating the day that he lost. We bickered over why Bush won for a while, but after the dust settled, those of us in the Young Democrats looked to the future. We didn't know who would be next for 2008, but we agreed on one thing - the Republicans had no one. The only name that came to mind that seemed feasible? McCain. This one I will absolutely chalk up to coincidence. Four years out, barring an incumbent or popular VP, it's anyone's guess.
After that summer passed, I was adjusting to my new college life. Orientation was a week long in the end of August. I was making new friends and there was a wide range of new experiences to enjoy. We had our fun while there were no classes. That is, until Katrina hit. Once that happened, something broke in me. Staring blankly at the reports coming in, I was aghast. How. How could we possibly endure this? How could one man be so blatantly incompetent? Or maybe, I thought cynically in my new dorm room, this was deliberate? Day after day, more incidents of preventable deaths. Newscasters were there, how couldn't there also be help? After watching the response to the Indonesian Tsunami, how could this possibly happen? It clicked. We didn't have the manpower because we were over in Iraq fighting a meaningless war. The hurricane became a perfect storm, fueled in part by the onset of Global Warming. Deeper yet, I realized that we we had, what we still have, was a government totally unconcerned with the well-being of all its citizens. From that point, I knew I could never be a conservative.
I became more jaded and turned increasingly to the internet, hoping for pieces of hope. Scraps that I could gather up and cling to in such a bleak time. I forget when I came to DKos. Before the 2006 election, but I was merely reading. I couldn't get enough information. I found myself entranced - I wanted to know all that I could and further refine and understand the world. I canvassed for the 2006 election, trying to elect local and state officials. I further helped with the Jason Altmire campaign, canvassing about areas I had never been before. I had grown up in South Central Pennsylvania, so I understood how these people felt, in a way. Their experiences became part of mine over my years of development, even if I wasn't fully aware.
Election day came and I was the regional manager for Video the Vote, a recently founded non-partisan organization bent on recording any and all instances of suspicious practices or faulty procedures concerning voting in light of the 2000 and 2004 elections. I was thrusted into the position, it seemed, but I am absolutely grateful for it. I awoke early that morning and walked through dilapidated streets of downtown Pittsburgh to arrive at the local station for Election Protection. Though it was a midterm election, there was a cornucopia of problems, including a faulty voting machine. It was near the end of the polling day and I was informed of a machine that was incorrectly asking all voters if they wanted to close the polls for the day. I received permission from a woman manning the polling location to view the problem before they closed. Though the date was correct, the machine still thought that the polls should be closed. It wasn't until after it happened that I realized I may have technically committed a felony - though I didn't interfere with any voters, I entered a station without permission of the Board of Electors. I felt that it was too important to let slip by. Nothing came of it, but I would have taken the fall for my videographers regardless. Oh, as a bonus, Jason stunningly defeated Melissa Hart that night.
Thus, we arrive at the current Congress. The number of progressives in the House is relatively strong, but it could be much better. The Senate was thoroughly obfuscated by the Republicans and Bush managed to bend our caucus by the mere threat of the veto. It's clearly not working as is, so something must be done.
And now, after the excruciatingly long primary season and nearly two years of campaigning, we are on the eve of the election. Only now does it truly set in.
Tomorrow, we can elect better Democrats to the House. Tomorrow, we can get those seats in the Senate needed to break the faux sixty vote barrier. Tomorrow, we can elect not only a Democrat with an impressive plan and a backbone, but the first African American President.
After I cast my vote tomorrow, I will be canvassing until the polls close. As kos said, "Leave everything on the road."
Years from now, I don't want to look into the eyes of a new generation and wonder "If only...". Not "If only we had acted, we might have curtailed the drastic climate change." Not "If only we had pressed harder for more health coverage, we might have saved some lives and improved others." Not "If only we had fought harder, our gay and lesbian friends could have families now." No. Not one "If only".
This immanence is what drives my revelation. We can, if we want to, put an end to these statements. We can stop wondering and simply do.
Honestly, this is a horrible time to be a child. It's not a particularly great time to be alive in. The world is not only evolving rapidly, but it is also throughly frightening. Climate change, drastic economy adjustments, and terrorism on top of merely living? It's tremendous. But, greatness was never made through simplicity. Advancement has always been through obnoxious, unbearable struggle. We are always at odds with the present so as to make the future.
This election is, and never was, about us. Elections are always about those yet to come.
All that we can possibly hope for in our blinks of existence is to struggle forward. We have, tomorrow, the enormous opportunity to press on. Tomorrow, we can outright refute that which is the now, not because we are all in a horrible state, but because we must. For that and those which have yet to be.
So, when tomorrow comes, we must get every "If only" out of our system. We must drain them and leave nothing. We must be exhausted by the end of the day and we must fight anew on Wednesday. We are never done, nor should we be. We must press on, because it is all there is.
Naïveté intact, I wait, with bated breath for tomorrow.