There's been a lot of vitriol about the passage of Prop 8 flying around this site, and a fair swath of finger pointing. The blame game might help alleviate some anger about Prop-h8 now, but it won't solve our problems and repeal the amendment in 2010. Here are my five suggestions on how to win over some hearts and minds.
Family Visibility
2-Year Door-to-Door Survey
Community Outreach
Un-Bleaching the Pundits
Facts and Stories
Details below the fold... [and don't be afraid to comment]
Family Visibility
A significant portion of the ads in support of Prop 8 and other anti-gay measures frame the issue as "protecting children." There's a nasty meme running around outside of the LGBT community that because we can't breed, none of us have children. The idea is also out there that a child needs both a mother and a father in order to enter society as a well-adjusted and independent adult.
The best way I know to fight this is to fight fire with families. Gay parents have a special interest in seeing this overturned, and they have a special opportunity to change minds--if more of them get active in their PTAs and neighborhoods, and we need to organize visibility around the effects this proposition has on their families and their children, their "protect the children" argument against the next proposition will be diffused long before they make it. If we don't push visibility of gay families and how prop 8 hurts our children, we cede the idea of family to the homophobes.
The Long-Term Survey
People don't like being told what to think. However, honest discussion can spur people to think about why they support a position, and simply asking people what their reasons for supporting an issue are can cause them to slowly reconsider their own beliefs. Imagine this--we get a small force to knock on doors for 2 hours one weekend a month until 2010, asking questions like 'would you be in favor of an amendment to the California constitution guaranteeing all people the right to marry? why or why not?' and questions many people haven't considered, like 'If your niece or nephew were to tell you he or she was going to have a wedding or commitment ceremony with a person of the same gender, would you attend?'
It'll take money and time to organize, but if we get people on the ground starting NOW and going STRAIGHT [or gayly] until election day 2010, we could turn the state around. Imagine--people knocking on doors in every county in California. It gets out the anti-hate message in an unobtrusive way, and meanwhile we are gathering valuable information about (1) who our supporters are, (2) what arguments and misstatements we need to discredit, and (3) what messages and situations cause people to think of LGBT people in their communities, not just shirtless men in parades in San Francisco and LA.
Community Outreach
No two bones about it, the ties between the LGBT community and ethnic minority communities in California are not strong. After all, what has the LGBT community done for other minority groups lately? Door-knocking needs to happen in minority neighborhoods, but we need to get off our butts and remember that minorities need to stick together. LGBT organizations should take a more visible role in advocating for the interest of other minorities. If people come out of the closet while picketing, fighting, and shouting for racial justice and immigrants' rights, the people they're picketing, fighting, and shouting with might be more willing to picket, fight, and shout alongside us.
However, I've got no magic answer for how to accomplish this. I'm no model for this--I don't have connections to groups who need volunteers in the Golden State--I just moved to Chicago. However, I'm counting on my colored brothers and sisters can help. Drag your gay friends to ethnic community events. Drag your ethnic friends to gay community events. They don't have to feel comfortable the first time, but if you start now, it'll be easier to get those friends in both communities to help in 2010.
Coloring the Pundits
Every time I see stock footage of a gay couple getting married on TV, they're both white. Every time I see higher-ups from LGBT advocacy organizations being talking heads on the TV, they're white.
I'm not alone in first thinking of gay white people when LGBT issues are addressed. A little racist? You bet! But people think about the LGBT community through the lens of what we show them. LGBT groups need to train more minority spokespeople and put them further out in public.
Facts and Stories
No matter how much the anti-marriage forces might disagree, our stories are better.
"I couldn't hold my wife's hand when she passed away" is a stronger story than "My daughter asked me why two women were holding hands in the street." If we match their fear stories with our horror stories, we win their hearts. But remember your Psych 101--people remember more strongly the things they hear FIRST and LAST. We need to talk now, and we need to keep talking all the way through November 2nd, 2010.
And remember your Lakoff--every time you tell a story, the frame gets built in the listener's brain. We need to tell our stories. If something awful happens to you because you couldn't marry your partner, get your emotions into a letter to the editor. With constant low-level exposure, people will have dozens of stories sitting in the back of their heads to use for critical reasoning when the next proposition shows up.
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So there's my Spiel. Instead of blaming ethnic groups who didn't support us in the numbers we would have wanted, let's go get their support for the next time around.